Monday, September 30, 2002

yummy delicious scumptious juice finger-licking food:)
*grInz*
it was well...one of the best wedding dinners i've ever attended. hahaha:) cool atmosphere, nice colours... there're even two large screens for me to watch zhen qing before the dinner starts. good looking couple:) hahaha. what can i say? the bride looks really pretty...model prettiness...and the guy (my relative) well...he looks a bit beng. *lol*
but then so are his friends who went on stage to go 'yum seng'.
my mum says that they're only about 21 years old and has a child. have dated each other for 1 year ++. hopefully they'll stay together for the rest of their lives happily:) (i refuse to believe the child part though)
on the other hand...i heard some bad news on the ride back home... something about one of my cousins committing suicide. by jumping off the building. eeeeekz. i wonder what caused her to act out her suicidal thoughts.
i'm going to nanyang jc. hopefully the environment there will force me to study.
so near my house as well...and no place to go to after school to eat. which means i'm forced once more to come back home. which i guess is good as well:)
mum has been extra nice... keeps telling me 'not to think too much' and just go on and do my o levels and try to score well and get into hcjc:)
-and the years go by so fast, wonder how i'd ever make it through-
i still can't taste anything:) *heh*
-she's taking her time making up the reasons,
to justify all the hurt inside,
guess she knows, from the smiles and the look in their eyes,
everyone's got a theory about the bitter ones-
whole bunch of nonsense today. non-sense. non-cents. nononono. not dollars. thankew. i forgot to bring my money to school too...only had like... $2 in my wallet. ah wellz. and i sincerely thought we were going to hy's house to do physics. double ah wellz. going for stupid wedding dinner tonight. don't even know the stupid person. oh. it's my dad's dad's brother's daughter is getting a son-in-law. which means that my dad's cousin from his paternal side is getting a son-in-law. how nice.
how confusing.
i wonder what'll happen if i really get bad results for my o levels... then i'll really be devastated. triple ah wellz.
-there's hope in the darkness-

Sunday, September 29, 2002

ooh. something from trivia.
what is another name for a transvestitie?
_ _
the answer is tv.
i have a tv at home. i watch programmes on the tv everyday.
:P
a more interesting fact:
who invented the scissors?
answer: leornado da vinci.
i am by the way, not an uranist and am glad that there are no aliens on Saturday.
an uranist is a poof and Saturday is also the name of a planet.
i love trivia. muahahaa.
it's terribly hard though. *frownz*
horror of horrors. i've lost my sense of smell.
and apparently, my taste buds has decided to follow as well.
strangely enough i can sense the spiciness in curry.
sighz.
i hope they come back soon. food substances intermixed with amylase and saliva tastes like water.
anywayz, i've finished reading the book. took me 3 hours...dragged till 1.45 in the morning. it wasn't as thrilling as i've thought it would be. more like this person's a psychopath. too absorbed into fantasy and role-playing. the four horsemen indeed.
oooh. i've found out who said the quotation that choo wrote at the back of my obs photo.
'do not follow where the path may lead. go instead where there is no path and leave a trail' - george bernard shaw.
i wonder if the shaw plaza's named after him. hahaha:)
my mum says i can save the chicken for my sister after i told her i can't taste anything and asks her if she wants the chicken instead.
stupid senses.

Saturday, September 28, 2002

reading 'pop goes the weasel' by james patterson now... trying to intermix books with doing homework and revision. i guess the latter two can mingle well together:)
so-close was very nice...cool technology once more. reminded me a tad about minority report...the difference? one's set in the future, this one's set in the present. and it seems more possible than the tech in minority report:) really cool fighting scenes as well. haha. flexible people. karen mok has a good body. i have a more positive image of her since the movie:) didn't really like her in movies before this. 'so-close' is about the standard of 'minority report' ... just a bit more rushed. apparently, they cut out some scenes 'cos the original movie was too long. i would have liked it to be long though. hahha. two hours is barely enough.
i felt that the scene when lynn had to give directions to sue to save her when she herself is being attacked by goodness knows how many lousy crap people was quite touching. and the scene when sue was crying was so...heart-wrenching.
what can i say? it's really nice:) worth every cent of my $8.50.
going on trivia. apparently jitsy says there's no more challenge since ishak went off. interesting. are you an aficiondo in chess?
"The rule for us all is perfectly simple. Do not waste time bothering whether you "love" your neighbor; act as if you did. As soon as we do this we find one of the great secrets. When you are behaving as if you loved someone, you will presently come to love him." - C.S. Lewis
ahz. nice person who said that. he appeared in trivia yesterday.
"The rule for us all is perfectly simple. Do not waste time bothering whether you "love" your neighbor; act as if you did. As soon as we do this we find one of the great secrets. When you are behaving as if you loved someone, you will presently come to love him." - C.S. Lewis
ahz. nice person who said that. he appeared in trivia yesterday.

Thursday, September 26, 2002

-It's kinda funny how life can change
Can flip 180 in a matter of days-
that's from 'one love' by blue.
all of a sudden, i'm interested in watching the chinese 'so close'. it sounds really good after the previews i've seen. haha. and the official website's cooL! it's at http://www.so-close.com:)
Real, constructive mental power lies in the creative thought that shapes your destiny, and your hour-by-hour mental conduct produces power for change in your life. Develop a train of thought on which to ride. The nobility of your life as well as your happiness depends upon the direction in which that train of thought is going. - Laurence J. Peter
my train of thought is zooming off the track of sanity into the marshland of madness. a grey mist hangs around, the coolness of the water in the air turns slowly to a lonely cold. my last sight of the drooping branches vanishes while the slooshing mud embraced me into eternal darkness.
come to think of it. it doesn't sound like a very interesting prospect to have...mud sucking me in.
i don't think i like prelims very much. the gep branch has probably made a giant mistake by getting me into the programme.
primary school...it was ... get into nanyang (or anderson), then get into hwa chong jc, then go into university, get become a teacher and teach. brilliant.
today... it is.... already in nanyang (but should probably have in other school), try to get into a jc (my foot), get into the university, train for psychology, become a teacher (or psychologist).
gracious.

Wednesday, September 25, 2002

i found the phrase in (surprise surprise) my horoscope.
a 'lost sense of order'.
- when i was young, it seems that life was so wonderful, a miracle, oh it was beautiful, magical
and all the birds in the trees, they make me sing so happily, so joyfully, oh playfully watching me-
hahaha. interesting phrase to put in a song
- love, peace and unity! -
something i got from joke-of-the-day:

Which gift would you like? To determine your personality, pick the gift you'd most like to receive...Make the choice now before you go on...don't look until you've made your choice...

1. Candy
2. Flowers
3. A sweet poem
4. Sex
5. Dinner/Dancing
6. Waffle iron

1. CANDY
It means that... You are a sweet person who enjoys traditional gifts and hopefully likes to share. OR... You're a selfish chocoholic who values a sugar high over everything, even true love.

2. FLOWERS
It means that... You love the beauty of nature, the scent of flowers and appreciate this timeless romantic gesture. OR... You get some twisted joy out of watching vegetation wither and die. (guess i'm sadistic)

3. A SWEET POEM
It means that... You're a hopeless romantic, a cultured person who recognizes the power and beauty of the written word. OR... You're used to cheap gifts and like to pass yourself off as a cultured person who recognizes the power and beauty of the written word.

4. SEX
It means that... You are a passionate soul, a free spirit who is not afraid to express your sexuality with another consenting adult and feel that the physical side of love can be meaningful and beautiful. OR... You're a filthy degenerate who is no better than a rutting animal living solely for one carnal experience after another.

5. DINNER/DANCING
It means that... You enjoy the company of that special someone and the romantic setting of fine cuisine and candlelight. OR... You're easy to please and probably willing to sell your body for food and a few quick turns around the dance floor.

6. WAFFLE IRON
It means that... You're a practical person who believes in gifts that you can actually use. OR... You have absolutely no idea of what gift-giving is all about and probably have some sort of deviant sexual fetish involving kitchen appliances.

Tuesday, September 24, 2002

-que sera sera, whatever will be, will be
the future's not ours to see,
que sera sera, what will be, will be-
hah. isobel reacted rather violently when she saw my msn nick that goes ''for what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?" 'cos apparently she saw a phrase similar to that in 'the book of good gardening' which is owned by the wolfs from the parallel world which is from the book 'the talisman'. she says it's a brilliant book and that she was doing injustice to the book by summarizing it. it sounds familiar actually. shall borrow it if i can find it:)
'the interpreter' is nice. there are actually some mind-grasping parts. some parts in which i felt it was rather true. (not of stupid love and what sorts of crap there may be) which will trigger raw feelings in people, then some medical stuff incorporated in it as well.
hahaa. i shall repeat the line at the back. it says that 'the interpreter' is "an exploration of moral integrity, emotional isolation and profound passion."
oh wellz, enough said about books. going to the central to buy a bag later:) 'cos i met yengyong and yunlei on the way back. so i've decided to accompany them as well... seeing that yengyong looked so stoned and yunlei was trying hard to cheer her up. ah wellz:) hopefully, she's better now. she doesn't want to tell me what the prob is... said something about "it'll make you feel sad as well." yun's mood got affected, so she left us for 'her friend' working in safra first, while i walked around with yengyong trying to find a present for joanne:) *grInz* didn't work though...we ended up trying to look for -whatyacallit-...you know, the thing that qingz wore to darren hayes' autograph session for her. she seems happier. even cracked some stupid jokes. hah.
there should really be a manual for comforting people. but then again, if someone really writes it, it's going to be really basic. 'cos everyone has a different way of being cheered up. and different preference. oh wellz:)

Monday, September 23, 2002

i've got a headache.
from the successive practicals:) hehe:)
went with them to eat sushi today...10 of us. whoa. four went for buffet. the remaining six of us, after eating a few plates, decided that the next time we come, we should come for buffet too. it's only $13! which is the price of about... six dishes...and qingz and jits they all have already happily consumed four plates, after which they still felt hungry. haha:) so we started lamenting about how we should have gone for buffet instead...especially when all the fried (non-oily) plates of stuff started appearing after the gas was restored:)
*slurp*
i got the unagi sushi, a kani tempura and an egg tempura (especially ordered. muahahaha). then i shared the jiao zi with weezi and wanling:) the next time, if i get buffet, i shall get three unagi, 1 egg tempura, 1 dumpling, 2 fried tofu, the salad and probably the dessert as well:) and other stuff if i'm not full by that time. don't think i will. too bad i don't dare to eat all the raw stuff, nor can i eat the seafood stuff.
hah. then of course we went home. 'sent' yengyong home, then 'sent' weezi home. then yunlei went to me to the central. she was buying food for 'her friend' who's working at safra...so i just took her around the place. ah wellz. in the end we still ended up at the tokopachi sorta balls place. another name though. anywayz, that's not important, what's interesting was that the guy who was managing Hebrews, was actually working there. haha:)
oh. and finally there's a sports store in toa payoh. sportslink. i shall venture there one day.

Sunday, September 22, 2002

do singaporeans have real singapore spirit? do we have that passion for our country?
are the people who wrote messages for team singapore today really supporting them? or did they merely write the messages 'cos of the prospect of winning 'attractive prizes', as quoted from the card?
i wonder.
the existence of human beings who smoke are starting to annoy me greatly.
cigarettes should be banned from singapore...just like bubblegum. all kinds of stupid stinky alcohol should be banned too..taking for eg. beer. wine's fine though.
let me see...what else should be banned?
viruses and bacteria should be banned from singapore. they should all be exterminated. oh wait, i change my mind. the good bacteria can stay, the lousy ones that are incredibly harmful, shoo away. dust too. foul words should be banned as well.
there. i shall think of more things to ban next time:)
hui qing says mammon inc. is just okay...
but after reading it, i thought it was really good:)
though i thought the portrayal of singapore was a bit... too extreme. i mean, not all singaporeans behave the same way. probably the portrayal of the oxford people were a tad exaggerated as well. oh wellz:) some stuff are rather stereotypical as well. in the religious context. for both religions mentioned in the book.
good book nonetheless.
going to read 'the interpreter' by suzanne glass next. the name dominique seems to have appeared various times in the books i've been reading these days. so interesting.

Friday, September 20, 2002

Researchers have come up with a neurological reason for why men are said to be more hot-headed or aggressive than women. Researchers at the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine used magnetic resonance imaging scans to show for the first time the relative size of the sections of the brain known to constrain aggression and monitor behavior is larger in women than in men. This finding could lead to new therapies to help psychiatric patients control inappropriate aggression and dangerous patterns of impulsive behavior. Lead author Ruben Gur says, "Perhaps the most salient emotional difference between men and women, dwarfing all other differences, is aggression. This study affords us neurobiological evidence that women may have a better brain capacity than men for actually 'censoring' their aggressive and anger responses
so cool. two whole days for entire relaxation. today and tomorrow:) *beamz* then it's time to start studying again. so sad. hehehe:) at least i won't have to worry about anything for these two days...no homework, no exams, no tests. what's done cannot be undone:) so i shall just wait for my exam results to come out. i hardly think that 15/25 for comprehension is considering as 'quite strong'. i hope my compo and summary are okay!:) hehehee:)
hmmz. i want to watch spykids 2:) *grInz* and the second harry potter movie. should be quite interesting:)
we went to junction 8 today to eat...and buy yengyong's present...hah. gotta buy a good present for joanne this year...'cos apparently i didn't get her one last year. oh wellz:) stupid movie theatre manager...he came and scolded us... said something about 'this is not a restaurant' so mean! i'm boycotting junction 8's movie theatre. hah.
oooh....today's horoscope's interesting. it goes:
Fall in love, make your art or somehow flood the world with your wondrous essence. Your mind is in orbit and your heart is in ecstasy. The strangest way to do things is the best.
*lol* i'm amused. it sounds....strange. *grInz* how nicely vague it is. i'm falling in love all over again with the library. *roflmao*

Wednesday, September 18, 2002

Too often we are scared. Scared of what we might not be able to do. Scared of what people might think if we tried. We let fears stand in the way of our hopes. We say no when we want to say yes. We sit quietly when we want to scream. And we shout with the others, when we should keep our mouths shut. Why? After all, we do only go around once. There's really no time to be afraid. JUST DO IT. - Nike advertising campaign
*hahaa* so interesting:)
there're two stray kittens at the void deck right now. i don't know what to do...they don't seem to be mewing any more... oh wellz.
i saw them this morning...heard them mewing throughout the night. both of them...about a few weeks old? old enough to go exploring on their own...not old enough for their claws to hurt though.
'cos i saw one wandering around when i came back from school today...saw it being peered at by one whole bunch of workers...so i just went up, stroked the underneath of its chin and carried it away to find its brother/sister... oh wellz. so cute you know! when both of them saw each other, they went rubbing against each other. then they follow me into the lift. they didn't though...seems to be rather scared of the door. oh wellz.
then i came up and looked at clover sleeping blissfully away. and i thought: hahaha. clover you're lucky to be here and not wandering around being lonely. *grInz*:)
comp seems to be compensating me for not working well for the past few days...it's going at an ultra speed now...everything's super fast. rather amusing. it seemed to have saved up its energy just for today:) *heh*
going out on friday and saturday. i hope:) will be a nice break from all the mugging. and studying. and trying to understand concepts. *grinz* physics mcq was a killer for me. how crap. i thought bio was okay...tougher than i wanted it to be, but quite okay. oh wellz...i don't know:)
*beam beam beam* miss choo told me that my structure for LOTF was very clear...very good. and she asked why i can't do the same for daily assignments. hehehe:) hmmmz...normally i get 14/25 for the essays... i know...very lousy..but oh well:) i hope i get at least a 16 this time. hahaha. for the LOTF. and give me a 16 for my unseen *prays* 32 in all...then i'll only need a 43 for my social studies... hmmz. nvm:)
i'll never be able to get a 43 for social studies...considering that i didn't even complete my 2(b). oh wellz. shall leave it all up to the teachers:)
i really hope i get good results this time. *prays prays prays*
not like the midyears...getting really terrible marks. oh pray let me get good results....:)

Sunday, September 15, 2002

all of a sudden, i have a craving for potatoey stuff:) *grInz*
and a good dose of window shopping cum movies cum chatting with friends cum walking around in shopping centers just being silly.
and to top it off i've just watched the channel u variety shows which basically tell you where good food can be found...with really nice shops manned by nice looking people. hahaha.
staying at home all day doesn't help...i miss the good ol' outdoors. just give me a place to explore!
i'm turning into a hermit. sooner or later, i'll have a crooked back and will slowly crawl out of the house screaming at people.
i'll be the famous singing hermit.
and if i do get out of my house, i'll be so uncomfortable with human company i'll tell hitting everyone in my sight...and crash all windows! and destroy the town of townsville!
and it is only when buttercup comes and kidnap my guitar and threatens to put it into the fire then i'll turn quiet and go near her.
however! she did me wrong. she hit me on the head with my guitar and put me into jail.
...
how drama.
singlish! (points up, slightly to the left)
it is btw, the nineth most memorable thing that tourists have voted about singapore.
there're actually tourists who love singlish. how cool:)

Saturday, September 14, 2002

am i proud of my school?
yeah of course i am... our school teachers are so anxious about the students it may just strike some people as amusing... *heh* one perfect example being the american accented nice literature teacher who came rushing into the library, shouting 'jin yue! is jin yue here?!' realising after that particular action that she has just caused a disturbance in the library, she smiled, and then asked what to do...so well, naturally the students told her to shout again.
grace says we're supposed to appreciate the fact that teachers are anxious about us. *grInz*
-did the wind sweep you off the feet,
did you get a chance to dance by the light of day-
i'm suffering from a lack of exercise...sooner or later, you'll see all the skin paling once more, the piling of fats around the body (ooh, we actually have a hormone that helps to make sure that the layer of fats under our skin is even throughout the entire body) and my face will get so pudgy you won't recognise me:)
interesting idea:)
new image. should be quite cool as well. *beamz* then i'll have a new identity...for some time or so.
zhuanghui's getting nostalgic about stuff.
-lay back, it's all been done before-
nostalga...something can be spread so easily.
it's starting to affect me. but i can't let it do so...for once i start, i can't stop easily. hahaa.
so some other day perhaps, when the sun is a mere lukewarm source of light and the breezes are light, then i shall reminisce.
but not tonight. the science papers draw near and any fluctuations in emotions would greatly affect the grades.
tonight i shall sleep in peace:)

Friday, September 13, 2002

idiot. i've only got 3 qp out of the global quest 'cos my comp was lagging like anything.
idiot idiot idiot.
'does your dog do that too?' on the topic of dogs farting.
'yeah he does...'cos ...well, he's a dog'
jamieyyl@hotmail.com is jamie yeo's personal e-mail address. am i interested? not really. now if you give me darren hayes' personal e-mail, i'll be perfectly delighted:)
i change my mind about the new version of 'can't help falling in love with you' by a*teens. *sigh*
i've gotta agree this time that they did destroy the song. the bridge is ...distorted out of proportions. so sad.
i shall go play with clover. and revise bio or something:)
haven't listened to the radio for the whole three weeks. i can't believe it. just turned on the radio ...and heard 'dilenma'. hmmz. the new song 'one love' by someone (blue?) was playing. quite okay i guess. but not up to my expectations. hahaha:)
-through the good and bad i will stand true-
evil cityguards. one just poured hot tar over me. what kind of a lousy cityguards are they? must have been the evil influence from Ivar. hah. or velrak. velrak irritates me greatly. irritating all the helpers as well. kept boasting about how he has good eq and all that crap stuff on newbie channel. i bet jit can beat him anyday. hah. imagine being beaten by a level one when he's at level 10. lousy crap lah him.
remind me to download 'the time is high' by atomic kittens. heard it during the holidays while i was with jitsy... couldn't remember to download it though:)
-i'm not the kind of girl who gives just like that
the time is high but i'm holding on
i'm gonna be your number one -
hah. interesting, cheerful song:) chirpy and all that stuff. hard to find such songs now:) i appreciate them singing the song. it reminds me of b*witched's style:)
camping at garbage currently. giving free garbage cans to everyone i see. everyone who needs it anywayz:) this izlong person's collecting them though. strange.
-see you at the crossroads-
comp's lagging again...really irritating, 'cos it seems like the comp's going to hang on me any moment:) oh wellz, nvm about it:) i shall make do with whatever there is. and type this out properly:)
had elect literature exams and a-maths paper 2 today...horrendous a-maths paper 2. couldn't perform at all. the whole time i did it...i was thinking, interesting day, i should be at home sleeping. hah.
elect literature was better i guess...got into the lit mood rather fine:) *grInz*:) sheila's notes were rather good...the way of piling her info. giving them a title, then sub-titles, then one or two quotes. i wonder if that's how she memorizes her stuff. hehe:) i did the prose. could have written out of point for the how did the narrator feel when he witnesses the execution. izzit just during the time when ryan is hanged? oh goodness. nvm about it.
sympathised with the hangman 'cos he's gotta do it again and again, then he has to face with the fact that he's the one who took away ryan's life, again and again...and he's so old and all that stupid crap. did passage based. hahaha. spotted the qn right on for superstition and fear:) *beamz*
actually i got the inspiration from the guidebook talking about religion in LOTF. but nvm..it can be my idea. haha:)

Thursday, September 12, 2002

"The lesson which life repeats and constantly enforces is 'look under foot.' You are always nearer the divine and the true sources of your power than you think. The lure of the distant and the difficult is deceptive. The great opportunity is where you are. Do not despise you own place and hour. Every place is under the stars, every place is the center of the world."- John Burroughs
human geography is really tough today... i bet most people took 3 physical and 1 human qn. haha:) mrs yak set the human geog qns...so crap...
i hope i'll be able to do okaily in it...heh:)
hmmmz. channel i on the vcd tv... how nice. finally.

Monday, September 09, 2002

diva rangers rock. what else can i say?
diva rangers absolutely rock.
even a triton thief doesn't rock that much.
diva rangers rock.
haha.
The Positive Side of Life...
Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun every year.
How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on.
Birthdays are good for you; the more you have, the longer you live.
Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.
Ever notice that the people who are late are often much jollier than the people who have to wait for them?
If Walmart is lowering prices every day, how come nothing is free yet?
Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.
Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened.
We could learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colors....but they all exist very nicely in the same box.
A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
-the greatest story love has told-
higher chinese got me really down... but 'heaven by your side' has got me up again:)
*heh*
i guess what's over's over...can't do nothing about it anymore. one can lament about the stupid questions...but still, no corrections to be done, no reversal of time to study again ... no regrets to be allowed for it. so i guess, all that we can do is...move on. we still have 9 more days of exams. hehe:)
i'm going to cook maggee mee.
ssttTTTttaarrVVIiiinnggg....

Saturday, September 07, 2002

-ni3 zai4 zhui1 qiu2, gu1 du2 de zi4 you2-
so strange. everyone seems to say 'do check with cindy about this and that' but no one seems to have e-mailed cindy about it. oh well, if they don't, i shall do exactly that. gotta tell her the street team add anywayz.
i wish i knew some big celebrity personally or something.(to the sudden reminder or sun yanzi being at shauna's house...)
or maybe not...i don't want to have to book an appointment to go out with my friend:) hahahaa:) that would be so sad.
went to popular today...to buy all sorts of stuff. including my long-awaited chemistry ten years series, a physics guidebook ('cos i'm only allowing one day for physics studying) and chiew's ruler. some other stuff as well...but not worth mentioning.
qing suggests that i tell miss choo that i've lost my LOTF if i get good results for my lit. hehe. and that she'll probably slaughter me for not telling her if i get bad results. i hope i get good results. hahaha:)
'have you ever' - brandy

[Chorus]
Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever

Have you ever been in love
Been in love so bad
You'd do anything to make them understand
Have you ever had someone steal your heart away
You'd give anything to make them feel the same
Have you ever searched for the words to get you in their heart
But you don't know what to say
And you don't know where to start

[Chorus]

Have you ever found the one
You've dreamed of all of your life
You'd do anything to look into their eyes
Have you finally found the one you've given your heart to
Only to find that one won't give their heart to you
Have you ever closed your eyes and
Dreamed that they were there
And all you can do is wait for the day when they will care

[Chorus]

What do I gotta do to get you in my arms baby
What do I gotta say to get to your heart
To make you understand how I need you next to me
Gotta get you in my world
'Cuz baby I can't sleep

[Chorus]
darren hayes' still coming to singapore on the 19th of november. how crap.
which means that i really can't go. even crappier. i should just ignore the street team altogether. hmmmph. waste my time.
dwell only in long term investments. hahaha.
"Don't be discouraged by failure. It can be a positive experience. Failure is, in a sense, the highway to success, in as much as every discovery of what is false leads us to seek earnestly after what is true, and every fresh experience points out some form of error which we shall afterwards carefully avoid." - John Keats
there's the magazine 'psychology today' in our school library. just realised it today. *grInz* and what do i find inside? a sex education video which guarantees a 100% satisfaction or some sort of a simiLarity. hah. oh btw, there's actually a hormone that relates to the motherly/fatherly instinct inside all of us...it's call crytosine or something...
on a darker note. don't ever consume thallium. you may just die of thallium poisoning. and people will think you have died of natural causes. evil type of poison i tell ya. and it's easily obtained. *shudders*
the mensa books in the library provides very good entertainment. though some are really irritating. and tedious. you can try the sleuth one:) that one's quite fun. hahaha:) crap jitsy was scaring me by saying that the time is up when it hasn't even reached four minutes. *bonkz jitsy* and she kidnapped my scrunchie! *conkconkconk* how am i going to keep my hair up during the exams i ask you? hmmz.
saw jasmine and geraldine when i took the bus home today. got the 'lilo and stitch' vcd from jasmine. hahaha. imagine my surprise when i saw her take the vcd out of her bag when i asked them if they have the vcd. *heh* geraldine and i walked jasmine back to her house before proceeding to take 238 from the outside. we talked about... hamsters. and whether they do have periods. oh well. geraldine's sadistic. she kept asking if you'll be able to see the bones and blood and everything if the mother hamster eats up her babies.
yileng ahz. your juniors.

Friday, September 06, 2002

i feel exuberant.
i feel released.
i feel exhilerated.
hmmz. wat else?
i feel happy.
but i miss everyone.
:D -> :(
hey fengyi. i miss talking to you. you don't much communicate with me anymore. (if it's da, she'll go *pout*. i'm xinying, i go *frownz*)
and tracy...i miss your company as well. you've still got a nice presence:) *beamz*
and hui qing. haven't gone out with you for an eternity. must make up for lost times. *grInz* after the exams. exams more important for now. *nodz*
weezi! we've been talking about too much solemn stuff. one day i shall find you out and we can all somewhere fun:)
yileng:) i'm ever so glad to be closer to you this year:) or rather...ehz...the later part of this year:) whatever it is, i'm glad:)
nina. hehe. i seem to be constantly talking to you. so nvm lahz horz?:) let's ponder about the workings of the universe again one day:)
ahz. don't think anyone else reads this rightz? from the two classes anyway.
so who do i miss?
no one for the moment.
i'm just curious to know how my god-mother would have been if she's still on earth. hmmz. i wonder if my god-mother is nice. heh:) hope she looks after me and bless me for my prelims.
hmmz. i was just thinking. poor miss lee. she's just trying to help...or counsel ...or whatever it is that she feels she's supposed to do...since everything's been cropping up these days and she has been asked to help. haha. so funny. and she's trying to be our friend as well. awww.
i feel enlightened once more. *ding!* (light bulb appears:) nononono. not because miss lee's trying to be our friend (she's already our friend anywayz)..just well. because suddenly everything just seems quite clear now. how i'm going to view stuff around. you know sometimes...i do need a second or third time reinforcement before i can really stick to it.
human's hearts do waver when faced with desires.
but i guess lessons do force the heart to stay in the future.
hmmz. what's that phrase? oh yeah. once bitten, twice shy. i was bitten more than twice. guess i should be really shy by now.
i'm shy.
*blinks* *ponderz* *winkz*
*lol*
yuerong says that i've mellowed down rather much. how sad. hahahaa:) i love life the way it is:) *beamz*

Thursday, September 05, 2002

i think i woke up my mum and dad after bursting out laughing. couldn't help it. it's the funniest thing i've ever heard about. hahahaha:)
*grInz*:) for more information, you can wellz...read shauna's livejournal...i think it's public. 'cos she told me once that she does have a private one when i told her i can't reveal my lj add.
for short snippets...i'll copy and paste some main parts here...
"heheh in revenge for telling sam *givesyouhugoftheday* that she (alina) was les with someone's cousin, and it was lust at first sight, they decided to tell ms lee that I was totally nuts over weilin yadda yadda. and ms lee actually believed them gosh. like a serious I am in lust/love with weilin thing. (helllo weilin you're cute! but not my type *slurrp*)
....(after a lot of typing later)
she then went on about how I shouldn't like weilin, and I said you can't just unlike someone, and what does she want me to do. and she's like repeat to yourself, "Weilin is a girl, weilin is a girl, weilin is a girl!" and I'm like "yeah I know, but she's really cute" (told you I had a vocab deficiency)
...(more typing and something about them discussing about who'll be a better gf)
and ms lee was getting rather freaked out it was superfunny when I laid a hand on her shoulder and she jerked away rofl =b
(the end)
I told her that I like her as a teacher and as a friend but nothing more lol, and said she wasn't my type, and not to be so heartbroken =b
actually I think she was more relieved than anything else.. gosh I really adore my teachers hehehe *wiggle* so cute hehe (no I do not have a crush on her) uggh =p I wonder if anyone read til the end, even I'm going halfblind by what I'm typing hehehe. and yes. she's homophobic =b

*hah* i'm totally amused. the day that shauna turns homo will probably be the day that i keep a cat in my house. which is like...never. late-night amusement. i shall tell that to shauna. hahaa:)
oooh. i finished watching 'state of divinity'...after like for eternity. really interesting show. got me thinking about stuff around as well:) shall type that later ...after i finish checking my e-mails.
oooh. i went to the temple of goddess mercy at waterloo street today. went with my mum.
then we walked around a bit:) *grInz* bought stone chocolates! and green tea sunflower seeds. and dried bananas. and mushrooms:) the mushrooms smell so nice!:):):) i was contemplating just buying one mushroom and taking in the dry mushroom smell:) hahaha. yeah, then we walked through bugis street. actually we wanted to just get to the mrt station...but then we stopped to eat the ever-famous katong laksa. *hahaha*
then we strayed once again before going to the mrt station...walked around bugis junction. nothing much to say actually. just went around looking for clothes. for my mum. don't think it suited her taste though.
the highlight of the day comes when i spotted this female who is about my age typing two ponytails, wearing a miniskirt and some hideous shirt. urgh. really bad fashion sense. no i change my mind. fashion? what fashion?
oh. and i've officially lost my LOTF. trying to figure out what to do.
bought starfruits today:) *beamz*
i wonder if yilin will actually agree to marry tian boguang in the end. considering that he's willing to sacrifice his life for yilin even when he knows that she may never marry him 'cos she's a nun. i wonder.
maybe they can be the shi1 fu and shi1 mu3 of heng2 shan1 pai4. hah.
i've realised that in the shows that came from hongkong...or have actors/actresses in them...there's bound to be the following : a complicated love relationship (eg. someone finding out that he/she likes another person but the other person doesn't...or is very nice to the original someone 'cos he/she feels indebted to the someone), kinship (or the realization of the importance of kinship), traces of homosexuality (i wonder why for? to appease the homosexuals in hongkong?) and lots of things to ponder about life once again.
hah. one perfect example will be 'state of divinity'. a popular one will be 'zhen qing' and the nice one that most people's probably watched before is 'hua mulan'. want more examples? 'feminine masculinity' and 'jin sheng jin shi'. oh yeah. 'detective investigation files 4' as well. hah. which reminds me. i was rather surprised that serene and michelle have both watched it before. oh wellz.
i was amused to find many of the words in the sec 4 ci yu shou ce to appear in 'state of divinity'.
i've decided not to go to the darren hayes concert i guess. that is, unless he changes the date or something. but i told the others i'll help out.
it's time to ...study...!:):):)
after i finish listening to 'zhui'.
hah. procrastination. 25,000 brain connections gone. *grInz*

Wednesday, September 04, 2002

just finished answering a Go Arts! survey...apparently 'cos i got a arts voucher as well. oh wellz. ahz. looking at some e-mail about jumpjive now...it reminds me of the song 'jumpjive and wail'.
felt irritated today. 'cos we didn't finish much. didn't revise much to tell the truth.(i thank miss ng for the electrolysis thingie though) rather annoying. so i went barking at everyone. heh. felt much better after lunch. apparently i had a 'sugar rush' 'cos of the amount of glucose i've taken in. how disastrous. i find myself being critical of everyone these days. especially myself.
now i feel drained.
and my body's not helping either. been feeling vomitty for the past three days.
i hope i'll never be unkind to anyone again.

Tuesday, September 03, 2002

25 mins of intensive studying, 5 mins of rest.
that's what the game 'brainpowerrr' suggests. something about the brain likes being pampered. haha:)
really lousy game. nice colours, nice cards, nice motivating sentences and all that...but lousy game to play.
shauna showed us the pictures that her sister took with jay, stephanie sun and all those people today. interesting. i wouldn't mind taking pictures with them either. but then i wouldn't die not taking either i guess. oooh. darren hayes has viral something. something about his throat. larynities (?) nvm. poor him. they have to reschedule the concerts. oh wellz. i hope he gets well soon. and that the concert in singapore would be postponed as well. *grIngrInz*:):):)
oh. this is the prayers page someone made. do sign the guestbook if you wanna wish darren well:)
ohohoh. weilin's hamster died. we were in the counselling room doing biology and she was sitting next to me and then her phone rang and she went like 'what?' at some point of her conversation and she went into this look of slight anger and disbelief. then i asked what happened and she said her hamster committed suicide. hah. then i asked if it's just her mother or somebody kidding her and she went to call her sister. oh wellz, apparently her sister put the hamster on the chair. then put an apple on the floor. according to weilin, her hamster'll do anything for food. so the fat hamster dropped onto the floor and died. weilin looked a tad distracted and her eyes were misty (jitsy agrees on that point). i was just thinking if clover dies, i'll probably start bawling my eyes out. or maybe i won't. don't know. i'll be too numb to do anything. weilin called her dad to fetch her home in the end.
oh well. we went to lunch (me, jitsy, qing and grace) at coronation again. and saw mrs audrey lee when we were sitting on the stairs and eating down there. hopefully she doesn't disapprove or something. haha. we bought a guava, an apple and prune powder for the guava. then me and qingz cut the guava up and *ta-da* got miss lee her lunch. *beamz* the power of the prune powder. it got some people addicted to it.
May every creature abound in well-being and peace.
May every living being, weak or strong, the long and the small
The short and the medium-sized, the mean and the great
May every living being, seen or unseen, those dwelling far off,
Those near by, those already born, those waiting to be born
May all attain inward peace.

Let no one deceive another
Let no one despise another in any situation
Let no one, from antipathy or hatred, wish evil to anyone at all.
Just as a mother, with her own life, protects her only son from hurt
So within yourself foster a limitless concern for every living creature.

Display a heart of boundless love for all the world
In all its height and depth and broad extent
Love unrestrained, without hate or enmity.
Then as you stand or walk, sit or lie, until overcome by drowsiness
Devote your mind entirely to this, it is known as living here life divine
- Buddha

Monday, September 02, 2002

hah. don't get me wrong. it's a really funny song:) *grInz*
'Kill the dog next door' - Arrogant Worms.
I once was a happy man of sound and stable mind,
Then my neighbor bought a dog.
He put a ribbon on it's head to make it cute,
But it still looked like a Chihuahua.
He had me over to watch it sit and beg,
It bit my knee and made love to my leg.
Now it barks all the night and all of the day,
Whenever it's not peeing on my lawn.

I didn't get to sleep last night 'til very late,
The stupid dog barked and grrrrred.
I got up late for work and ran to catch the bus,
But I slipped on a turd.
I was certain it wasn't one of mine,
And that that dog had crossed over the line.
I wanted to exterminate it and all its kind,
From my lovely little suburb....

I'm gonna kill the dog next door, ain't gonna bark any more
'Cuz this is Judgment Day and the little runt has got to pay.
No more turds on my lawn, that stupid mutt will soon be gone
Gonna kill kill kill kill kill kill kill that dog.

I see the little monster in my garden,
So I grab and axe and off I go.
And I try my best to get it,
All I do is sever my big toe.
My neighbor comes outside to calm me,
He says his dog and me should just be friends.
He puts his little pet in my forgiving hands...

Then it starts to bite so I strangle it with all my might,
Oh oh oh oh ooh.

I'm gonna kill the dog next door, ain't gonna bite any more
'Cuz this is Judgment Day and the little runt has got to pay.
No more turds on my lawn, that stupid mutt will soon be gone,
Gonna kill kill kill kill kill kill kill that dog.

Now that stupid mutt's in doggy heaven,
I strangled it to death and now I'm free.
But my trouble ain't quite over,
My neighbor called the cops on me.
I end up at the police station,
Where I am told that I must pay,
A three-hundred dollar fine....

Wow, what a good value I think I'll kill my neighbor too,
Oh oh oh oh ooh.

I'm gonna kill the guy next door, won't call the cops anymore.
I never liked him anyway, three hundred isn't much to pay.
There are turds on my lawn,
They must be his, his dog is gone
Gonna kill kill kill kill kill kill kill
Kill kill kill kill kill kill kill
Kill kill kill kill kill kill kill that guy!
hmmz. went to mac's just now to study.
too cold though. should have wrapped myself up in a jacket, wear long pants and sports shoes. instead, i did the opposite. managed to survive for an hour and a half before i packed up my stuff and came back home.
was sitting beside this group of people - two guys and a girl. didn't realise that the girl was hui si until like...ehz, one hour after i've been in mac's. pretended not to see her though. didn't know what to do actually, didn't know whether to say a 'hey huisi!:)' or what. decided not to 'cos she was with her bf, and totally leaning into him. oh wellz:)
and their friend was rather amusing. looking everywhere around him except for them. how do i know? 'cos i was doing the same thing. hahaha. and i was just sitting at the table next to them. told you i was stupid not to realise.
going to watch episode 31 of 'state of divinity' later. it's my break for the day:) after i finish 2 more chapters of stupid 4A. bah.
i forgot all about nina when i told everyone else about the change of blog address. oh wellz.

I am Pocahontas!
Which Disney Princess are you?


You feel a deep, spiritual connection with the earth and animals. While you fight against things as serious as oppressive invaders threatening your people's entire culture and way of life, you're still a young woman with a sense of humor, reflected in your choice of the mischevious raccoon for a pet. What you admire in a man are very noble qualities -- understanding and tolerance. You could never get along with someone who thought they owned the earth and were free to use it as they chose and not take care of it. You value life in all its forms. Although you're the Disneyfied version of the real-life Pocahontas, you're still a good person with high moral fiber and a big heart, and a wonderful role model for everyone.

Sunday, September 01, 2002

hah. i feel tired.
*grInz* went to the 2002 women's world cup with isobel today. iso's dad picked me up and fetched us both there. he was rather jolly...reminded me of fungi's dad as well. iso said her dad's normally not SO jolly though. hahaha:) nvm:) anyway, i think we got there rather late or something...'cos the game has already started, and we could hardly find a good seat. anywayz. the point is, it's cool to watch it live. not as nice as i've wanted it to be...i've wanted to get there by 6.30pm so that we can have good seats...but cool nevertheless:)
the whole place cheered in unison and went 'awwww'. there were a lot of 'honking' made by those party honks...isobel suggested that they're a nicer way of saying 'boo'. *haha*:) the hongkong people were more interesting to watch than the china ones... really boring china people. no nice smacks and counter-smacks. ohoh. we were rather disappointed when the whole thing ended at like.. 8pm... i mean, we thought that it's gonna end at 10 or something and at 8, we got up to get some refreshments...but then the whole crowd got up as well. ah wellz. nvm about it:) we got out of the place before they started giving ping pong balls.
felt rather cheated to tell the truth...just when the both of us are getting into the mood. hahaha:) oh wellz, nvm about it. next time i know...i shall just attend the opening ceremony:) *beamz*
then we went to the central, walked around, went to the entertainment center to get postcards. isobel took 157 home 'cos she couldn't contact her dad. well, i walked around somemore, bought breakfast, and -duh- went home:) quite a nice evening if u ask me:) though my eyes kept hurting.
i'm stuck on bryan adams now... nice voice, nice songs, nice tunes, nice lyrics, nice comforting feeling and all:)
studying for higher chinese right now. just realised a whole bunch of interesting phrases i've never seen before. *heh*:)
ooh. i wanna help in SOS in the future.
after i've reached 23:)
there's information about suicide prevention on the website. rather useful if you wanna know more.
and this page holds a whole list of contacts one can get in response to all sorts of problems. and i do mean all sorts.
so if anyone's feeling stressed or anything. you can just call 1-800-211 4444 and talk. they'll listen to your problems and how it affects you. they won't judge you or anything.
just remember, there is always someone you can talk to.
suicidal thoughts are mostly temporary as well.
one of my last little inputs for today. it's 1.54pm and i haven't eaten anything. i feel hungry:)
utopia- term coined by Sir Thomas More in the early 16th century. Derived from two Greek words: Eutopia (meaning 'good place') and Outopia (meaning 'no place'). Thomas More intended the irony when he wrote his genre-setting novel, Utopia .
"The word now conjures up the vision of an ideal society." --Henry W.Targowski (in Mark/Space ).
hah. which means that there is no place which is ultimately a 'good' place.
interesting idea...utopia is. it touches on feminism and studies on the workings on the government. very interesting indeed.
everything wrong's coming at the right time.
hah. it could have been worse. coming right smack in the middle of prelims. woohoo.
that would have been a splendid display of fireworks.
some stuff going haywire with the singapore street team, some stuff going haywire in my brain and some stuff going haywire in the world around me.
other than that, everything's fine:)
is everything fine with you too? i wonder.
since everyone's life seems to be going haywire as well.
oh well, don't let that affect you too much.
sometimes, it's good to be selfish.
prelims are more important.
grades may count more in life then one chooses them to be.
that's all i have to say for today:)
i guess.
*beamz*
i'm a human. and human are supposed to be able to withstand all sorts of stuff.
i'm glad that i'm a human.
human
hueman
whew-men
yumen
lumen
the lumen of the artery is wider than the lumen of the vein. understand?
the artery carries blood away from the heart while the vein carries blood to the heart.
the size of your fist is the size of your heart.
when one has a big heart, figuratively, one is magnanimous. rightz?
i have a big fist, does that mean i am very magnanimous?:)
but magnanimous is defined towards an enemy. if i don't have any enemies. does that mean i don't have a big fist since i can't be magananimous, meaning i don't have a big heart?
---
let me search for the definition of utopia before the prelims instead of others.
perhaps miss choo would be glad to see me handing up something before time for the first time.
heh.
i've changed the date for darren's concert.
it's on the 19th November, a tuesday:) so sorrie for any confusion caused. *grInz*:)
-oh my sleeping child, the world's so wild, but you've built your own paradise
that's one reason why, i'll cover you sleeping child-
i feel a tad lethargic.
got woken quite a few times by clover throughout the night to play with it.
shouldn't have her in the bedroom next time. i won't be able to sleep.