Being a counsellor/teacher is a bit like being an alternative parent to a child.
Just like how the best form of parenting is that of an authoritative parenting, I have realized that probably the best way to help a child grow is to have an authoritative stance towards them.
Stating down clear expectations. And showing them unconditional love.
Clear expectations, and unconditional love.
That includes listening to them whenever, wherever. Includes not nullifying their needs and desires.
Includes not giving in to all their wants and desires. Includes speaking with them, sharing clear emotions towards them (e.g. I am disappointed when you have promised to come to school, but did not.)