Saw this from 'The Jesus I never knew':
the author quoted from M.Scott Peck, who quoted from an old priest who spent many years in battle:
"There are dozens of ways to deal with evil and several ways to conquer it. All of them are facets of the truth that the only ultimate way to conquer evil is to let it be smothered within a willing, living human being. When it is absorbed there like blood in a sponge or a spear into one's heart, it loses its power and goes no further." and he goes on to say that
"the healing of evil - scientifically or otherwise - can be accomplished only by the love of individuals. A willing sacrifice is required ..."

earlier in the book, it says
"in a sense, the paired thieves present the choice that all history has had to decide about the cross. Do we look at Jesus' powerlessness as an example of God's impotence or as proof of God's love?"
and to end the chapter, Philip Yancey wrote
"Power, no matter how well-intentioned, tends to cause suffering. Love, being vulnerable, absorbs it. In a point of convergence on a hill called Calvary, God renounced the one for the sake of the other."

I found this to be a reminder of how God's love is not lovey dovey, easy love. It's a sacrificial, love your enemy, life changing, world altering sort of love.
it's a love that loves unloveable people.
which makes it so hard to follow!
Sometimes it's so much easier to assert power. rather than to restrain and love.
Got to constantly remind myself.
God is just.
He will be my judge.
At the end of the day, I have to account to Him for my actions.
Not the actions of people around me.
Self accountability.