i think having 3 presentations weighing at the back of my mind is starting to take a toll on my mind. haha. can't focus and filter them out, along with lots of other things to be done.
and the monday holiday is also causing me stress. hahahaa. i wish the holiday was today instead of monday so that i can take the time to study for JLPT. hahaa
i think the perfectionistic mel side of me is coming up.
must be cos teachers have been coming to find me and asking me about students! or about the assertive training program (cos the main i/c has taken a half year no pay leave, and the new ic hardly remembers or knows much cos last year the main i/c mainly talked to me about it).
guess July will continue to be a busy month. haha. being stressed is good cos it helps me to focus.

today i'm more clearheaded ^^
could be cos i had some rest time yesterday. haha.
could be cos i'm not emotionally affected by who i met by chance on tuesday night.
could also be because one of my eyes is perceiving the world as a blur form because the lens does not have light conversion property. hahaha.
just returned after being invited to have chocolate. haha. funny.
my concentration is kinda dispersed now too :\

just watched the first episode of Jin. It's about a brain surgeon who somehow got warped back to the edo period. the fetus lookalike tumour he cut out is super freaky. the story's pretty interesting though, seeing how he adapts to the new situations he finds himself in and all :)

the CHC thing hits closer to home than expected cos it reminds me of what happened to our Thailand church, and also because my own cousin (and his wife) is a church staff of CHC.
I have mixed feelings whenever i see allegations against a church leader, cos things in the belief system and what is seen doesn't quite gel. lol. should pray for them.
the public has to remember that the church itself is not under allegations

Stumbled onto this in facebook. it's a wedding invitation with the outline of the couple's journey. thought it was pretty interestingly designed!

research has shown that the quality of the therapeutic relationship in counselling is as important as the particular treatment method employed.

haha. my fellow FTSC just passed me an invite from oogachaga (what a name!) with regards to a 3 part training on working with the LGBTQ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transexual, questioning) community, focusing on gay and bisexual males. i think it's pretty tricky to decide whether to go for such training or not (though i have a burden for this group of people) because the values and understandings behind the trainings would be different from mine. they also touch on helping clients who are coming out (a process of sharing to their relatives and close ones about their sexual identity), coupled with relationship issues, partner violence (this i think is important) and substance and behavioural issues (this would be important too).
well. i guess i should go finish reading the books first. haha

July is gonna be a busy month! D: I have 2 official presentatons and an official sharing to be done D: that means 1 set of ppt slides, 1 counselling session to be recorded and presented, and research to be done. haha.
funny. my specialized topic is relationships. i didn't even remember about it.

I think I need to read up on social phobia. Lol. And I really wish they'd inform us earlier if there's induction for new teachers. Lol.

next time when i have my own home, i'm definitely going to have
1) a good washing machine
2) a tumble dryer. they save so much time! :D

hahaha. nothing much to type here :)
was looking through my handphone notes, and here are something which i wanted to add on from the trip =)
was coming back from japan, and the flight from tokyo was delayed. subsequently, the transfer flight at hongkong international airport not just changed gates, but was also delayed 40 minutes (in terms of boarding time). at the end of the day, the flight reached an hour later than it was supposed to. haha. the not so nice thing was this: when i went up on the plane and reached my seat, it was to my bewilderment that i find my seat occupied. Hoho.
the person just anyhow changed seat so that he can sit with his friends-_- i specifically checked in 2 days before because i wanted to see Singapore in the evening from above. lol. but a potentially irritating experience was soothed by the nice air stewardess who helped me check, then asked me nicely if i'd like to take his original seat (an aisle seat in the middle section) instead. the funny thing was how she explained it. she was like 'it's more easy to go to the toilet also' in a 'i think this is definitely a much better seat!' kind of tone. hahaa. i thought her positive attitude towards the seat change was quite nice. haha. not the very professional kind of attitude, but rather a 'i'm with you and i can definitely identify with u and will help u in whatever way' kind of attitude.
so that was rather nice :) even though the flight was rather delayed. haha. i watched big bang theory (haha. the last time i watched it on the plane, it was showing the first season, which was a pity since i've already watched the first season. this one was a new season, so that was pretty nice too) and CSI on the way back. so tt was pretty enjoyable too :)
i kinda miss my Japan trip in the way of how luxurious my time was. haha. i liked planning out how my days are, and i changed my QT time to mornings in Japan cos it was nice and luxurious to be able to just spend time with God while drinking miso soup to start my day :) haven't been able to do so in Singapore D: my body definitely wakes up with light, so when the day started by 4+am in Japan, waking up at 6am Singapore time was a rather easy thing to do. wahaha. i miss that too!

에프엑스_Electric Shock_Music Video

Can't quite understand why they gave them this style for f(x)'s come back song. lol. but i like the fact that they have more solo parts in this song :) their vocals have improved!

Meet Tigger

LOL. meet one of my favourite characters! hahaa.

back in Singapore after 2 weeks of Japan.
first thing I missed were the queues in Japan. and the better manners.
second thing was the weather.
the third was the 103 yen for 1.5litres of ocha/mugi-cha/oolong-cha....
but then again, i do miss Singapore much as well :) i miss the more spacious roads, and the ease of connecting to the internet as and when I want it.

i'm actually quite excited that i got to experience the typhoon (since u can't really predict when it'd come). hahaa. though having the train delays and cancellations was pretty troublesome, especially when one is going back to minamisenju from a place like nichijoji. haha
でも大変だったなあ～最首はスパで買い物をするつもりでした。でも、台風があるから、帰らなきゃ。まあ～

this song suddenly popped into my mind while i was cleaning my face :) haha.

sleepy. disneyland passed by in a flash and i can hardly remember what i did. haha. other than how fireworks at disneyland was pretty disappointing (why ah? so different...), and that my last ride was spoilt by this overseas family who kept yapping behind my back, bumping into me, overwriting into my private space (okay, i'm sorry. i'm anal abt my private space D:) and taking flash photography in the attraction itself :(
whatever happened to social manners? O_o

when i took my feet out of my heels today, they were FLAT. hahahahaa.
like flattened. now they've gone back to the fleshy feet they usually are. hahaa. this is so funny.
i sincerely think i will probably lose weight if i stay in Japan long enough (without joining in nomikais). hahaha. cos i walk so much nowadays stairs no longer present an obstacle. and i've been wearing heels every single day, heels are like an extension of me now (i guess i've always felt comfortable in heels, so maybe that's not counted). with the high cost of food here causing one to seriously consider what foods to eat, it's the best place to lose weight.
haha
wanchien says there's gonna be a typhoon tmr evening! am joining her and two other sisters to celebrate one of the sister's birthdays :D (like i'm starting to wonder why i'm joining them when i've only met the sister once :( hoho)

everytime i'm on holiday, or when i'm on STM, i usually come to a time when i think i'm pretty selfish. haha. in terms of how i keep spending resources on myself, when the resources can be better used to bless other people.
like for eg. going for tokyo disneyland tmr >_<わがままするね。
~私たちの働きを用いてください~

日本語の歌に神はちちと呼んで、いいな～
haha.
i realized that I can read more words that I thought I can. hahaa. but my understanding is still slow! I'm dead... hahaha. i've not done any revision AT ALL in the past few days.
on the other hand, i woke up this morning being not sick :D really quite thankful. hmm. recently before the conference, or before service in another place, i've been facing really bad stuff. like waking up in the middle with bad nausea(??) or having fever the day before (??) . makes me wonder...
had a good time with the Hope Tokyo people :) went for outreach with them at Waseda for a bit before service. hahaha. みんないつもがんばっているね。シンガポールに働くのは日本よりやすいですが、みんなまだ神を信じて、つついて。私は感動しました。、

多分今日雨がつっと降っていたから、体は悪くなる。寝れば、元気になると思ったけど、元気になさそうね。も一度薬を飲まなければならない。
薬をのむのは大嫌い！

watching the anime series of 'kaicho wa maid sama!'. haha. it's a shoujo anime despite the title. rather lighthearted to watch, despite the very stereotypical plot progression. it's an airy anime.

i think being in Japan for more than a week has caused me to heck care about Japanese customs and what nots. and i think i was prob overly concerned about not causing trouble for the rest. it seems like wherever i go, whatever i do, it's within the acceptable boundary of what people will expect, so i let down my guard today (and promptly started to sleep on the subway again. LOL)

finally went to a shrine today just to see what it's like. i think we should build churches within lots of trees too! no wonder God calls us to come to Him in solitude. i really enjoyed walking through the whole bunch of tall trees (though it was raining like crazy and my feet hurt like mad after walking on rough gravel through the entire trail).

it's 7.46 Japan time but i'm super sleepy D:

haha. seeing tt it's 12.45 japan time, i don't think my plans to sleep and wake up early is working.
i naturally wake up (as in become more alert) after 4pm :( i'm so dead. hahahaa. it's my natural body clock! haha
well.
i find it amusing when Japanese people ask me for directions. hahaa. or they keep talking to me in Japanese, or tell me that they thought I was one :\ so i guess i don't have to do much to look like one? hahaaa. wellus.
sleepy.

After being in Japan for a few days, I suddenly felt very thankful for the things in Singapore. For example, the prices of the shoes and clothes in Japan are CRAZY. hahaha. like REALLY CRAZY. the average cost for a top is SGD$30-$45, and the average cost for a bag is SGD$75. ?!?! shoes are no matter. shoes are like considered cheap at SGD$30-$45 T_T

okay. maybe these are considered as normal prices for others, but I don't usually spend so much on clothes, so these prices are really maddening in my humble opinion and worldview. haha. i spent SGD$75 in Loft alone on nail stickers and paper :X
transport fees are definitely much cheaper in Singapore too. hahaa.
food prices too D: have been spending ard SGD$10 - $15 for each lunch and dinner D: i'm gonna diet from tmr onwards to save money. LOL

so fast... the holidays are coming to an end T_T
hahaha. time is running out! LOL.
it's now 10:40pm in Tokyo. i shall sleep soon. so that i can practice waking up at 7am in the morning. wahaha. so many things to do, so little time. haha :) i guess part of the excitement in life is to plan for all these things? haha.

my first blog post after many many days. haha. actually it's only been a week or so since i've come to Japan, but i think the lack of fellowship and unfamiliar surrounding is taking a toll on me. it feels like i've been here for a month or so. time is passing by seamlessly. haha.

and it actually feels weird to use english to type. HAHA.

finally am able to type out a post since i'm currently in the inn waiting for my clothes to be washed in the ever friendly auto coin washer :D i love non-hotels for the washing machines. hehe. i love budget travel! :D
was reconsidering my desire to go backpacking in japan when i was with my mum and sis, but once i stepped onto the shinkansen, the desire came back. hahaa. i think i'm able to survive quite well on my own cos half the time i'm having narratives in my head (so it didn't seem like i was alone). i've probably have had an overdose of ppl in the past week. haha.
it's interesting to note how everyone has different objectives, as well as how the travel habits of a person shows through the trip. like for example, i'm always on the lookout for claw machines, books, things to buy for people, interesting writing pads and stickers.. hahaa. my sister, on the other hand, will look out for clothes, shoes... my mum will look out for things to eat, or seek to rest (so actually Japan's not a good place for her to come to. since we walk ard a lot). lol.
well :)

Fear Is Easy, Love Is Hard - Official Lyric Video - Jason Gray

each day, we have the choice to love, or to fear :) i want to continue to choose to love and forgive. i guess life is too short to always choose the easier way out? :)

oh! i love sudden downpours! love the smell of rain :D

i forgot my brush too. haha. and didn't bring my toothpaste. haha. i guess this is what happens when one packs in a hurry. LOL

i realized what i forgot to get. i forgot to get Chi's sand. hahaa. faint.
suddenly don't feel like leaving. hahaa. things not settled i guess.

have been doing calculations of my finances for these few days, as well as tidying up my room, and planning out my days and weeks. i was quite restless in the first two days, but at this moment, i quite like the flow of things. haha. had the chance to have dinner with my mum, and today with both my parents, something which i've not been able to do so in a while (partly also cos i'm always out at night).

it's a pity that i'm flying off soon, since i'm just getting adapted to life in this current pace. haha. realized that i have left a lot of things hanging around (e.g. things bought but not given out, or ideas which have stayed with me, but not carried out) due to a previous lack of time, together with half-read books. i'm thankful for this period of time that i can sort the various things out in my life as well :) and i kinda need a lot of time to do settling since i flit from one thing to another. haha. i can't just spend like 8 hrs tidying my room cos i lose attention quite fast, but eventually i do come back to it (maybe after a day, and i continue to tidy up my room?). hahaa.

~2am, and my cat is sleeping~
i love my mid-year trips cos it gives me so much space to wonder and wander. haha. though after last year's STMs, travelling to explore didn't seem as meaningful as travelling with a purpose of doing something for the people overseas. haha. but still, am looking forward to seeing Japan again :)