Friday, February 26, 2010
i realized that it takes lesser effort to sustain a conversation on msn than in real life.. not just because a lag time is normal, but also 'cos there's no need for eye contact, for genuine listening, and for appropriate reactions.
LOL
but i like to see people's faces when they talk. and to see how they react :)
LOL
but i like to see people's faces when they talk. and to see how they react :)
Monday, February 22, 2010
My classmate's child's blog!
so fun :D
today i was just talking to one of my colleagues who gave birth roughly six months ago :) hahaa. her baby's starting to be able to smile at people proactively! LOL
so interesting to listen about her baby :)
so fun :D
today i was just talking to one of my colleagues who gave birth roughly six months ago :) hahaa. her baby's starting to be able to smile at people proactively! LOL
so interesting to listen about her baby :)
Just read this on Counselling Connection:
Boundaries are a crucial aspect of any effective client-counsellor relationship. They set the structure for the relationship and provide a consistent framework for the counselling process.
Some boundary lines are clear. Most counsellors would acknowledge that it is ethically problematic, for example, to counsel your ex-partner because the pre-existing relationship impairs objectivity and serves to undermine the professional relationship.
Whilst situations such as these are clearly problematic, outside of such elementary confines are numerous situations where the delineation of boundaries is less clear. These situations fall outside of the formal code of ethics and lie instead in an ambiguous grey area.
Boundaries are guidelines that are based on the basic principles of the counsellor/practitioner code of ethics.
Corey (1996) briefly outlines five principles in which therapeutic boundaries are based upon:
1. Beneficence: a counsellor must accept responsibility for promoting what is good for the client with the expectation that the client will benefit from the counselling sessions.
2. Nonmaleficence: “doing no harm”. The counsellor must avoid at all times, (even inadvertently) any activities or situations with the client that could cause a conflict of interest.
3. Autonomy: the counsellor’s ethical responsibility to encourage client independent thinking and decision-making, and to deter all forms of client dependency.
4. Justice: the counsellor’s commitment to provide an equal and fair service to all clients regardless of age, gender, race, ethnicity, culture, disability and socio-economic status.
5. Fidelity: being honest with clients and faithfully honouring the counsellor’s commitment to the client’s progress.
The confusion caused by boundaries is best described by Corey (1996) as a continuum, ranging from disengagement (rigid, inflexible boundaries/guidelines) to enmeshment (flexibility to the point of diffusement) with a large grey area in between that is notoriously ambiguous and dependent upon the counsellor, the situation and the client’s changing needs and circumstances.
To be an effective counsellor, one cannot disengage from the client to the extent that the counsellor cannot empathise with the client. That is not the purpose of counselling and is counterproductive to the therapeutic relationship.
However, the counsellor does not want to empathise with the client to the extent that they hug the client upon meeting them or rant and rave with their client in a mutual expression of anger. Nor would the counsellor pop in to visit at the client’s home on their own way home from the office. This is the behaviour of a friend, not a counsellor. Hence, boundary violation has occurred.
Ambiguous boundaries often arise in counselling, but strict responsibilities do apply to the counsellor in relation to their duty to inform clients of the limitations on client confidentiality. Such information forms a large part of informed consent and informed consent is a fundamental client right.
Case Study - Brief Example
Jenny had been seeing her counsellor, David, for two years when she was rushed to hospital for emergency surgery. As she was extremely stressed and upset on the phone, David visited her at the hospital the following day. Jenny was in horrific pain, and David sat in a chair beside her bed and took her hand when she held it out to him. David offered some words of comfort, and after ensuring that the family would be visiting Jenny soon, he left the hospital.
Jenny was aware that this was an exception to her usual counselling sessions with David and it would not be repeated. David’s visit to the hospital simply meant that he cared for her and could appreciate the depth of her pain and vulnerability.
At the first counselling session with Jenny after her discharge from hospital, David took the first few minutes of the session to discuss his visit to the hospital to ensure that Jenny understood fully its place in the context of the therapeutic relationship.
While some counsellors would not have visited Jenny at the hospital, arguing that it took the therapeutic relationship outside of the confines of the office and that the counsellor’s behaviour could have been misinterpreted by the client, many other practitioners believe that a decision must be based on the individual circumstances and the uniqueness of each relationship with each individual client.
The professional manner in which David conducted himself during the hospital visit and later at the first counselling session allowed David to move the boundaries in all good conscience. He was not cavalier about his visit to the hospital, rather he carefully thought out his decision; considering the ramifications and benefits for his client.
His behaviour was appropriate as a professional, in a professional setting, he did not make the mistake of thinking his visit was equal to that of a friend and neither did he behave as a friend. Also, as soon as he was able, he spoke to the client to clarify the visit and remove any possibility of ambiguity or innuendo.
Conclusion
Efficient counsellors recognise that the intense feelings that can rise in the counselling session can often challenge a counsellor’s personal and professional boundaries. Counsellors who understand the serious effects of their own personal power, and how that can be misinterpreted by the client, also take the boundaries of the counselling profession seriously.
When counsellors choose to be flexible regarding boundaries, they do so carefully, having taken into account the ramifications of their flexibility for their client.
------------------
Think it's helpful to me to read this 'cos I've sometimes worried about the boundaries to set while relating to students (particularly in giving them my handphone numbers and receiving smses after work).
lol:)
Boundaries are a crucial aspect of any effective client-counsellor relationship. They set the structure for the relationship and provide a consistent framework for the counselling process.
Some boundary lines are clear. Most counsellors would acknowledge that it is ethically problematic, for example, to counsel your ex-partner because the pre-existing relationship impairs objectivity and serves to undermine the professional relationship.
Whilst situations such as these are clearly problematic, outside of such elementary confines are numerous situations where the delineation of boundaries is less clear. These situations fall outside of the formal code of ethics and lie instead in an ambiguous grey area.
Boundaries are guidelines that are based on the basic principles of the counsellor/practitioner code of ethics.
Corey (1996) briefly outlines five principles in which therapeutic boundaries are based upon:
1. Beneficence: a counsellor must accept responsibility for promoting what is good for the client with the expectation that the client will benefit from the counselling sessions.
2. Nonmaleficence: “doing no harm”. The counsellor must avoid at all times, (even inadvertently) any activities or situations with the client that could cause a conflict of interest.
3. Autonomy: the counsellor’s ethical responsibility to encourage client independent thinking and decision-making, and to deter all forms of client dependency.
4. Justice: the counsellor’s commitment to provide an equal and fair service to all clients regardless of age, gender, race, ethnicity, culture, disability and socio-economic status.
5. Fidelity: being honest with clients and faithfully honouring the counsellor’s commitment to the client’s progress.
The confusion caused by boundaries is best described by Corey (1996) as a continuum, ranging from disengagement (rigid, inflexible boundaries/guidelines) to enmeshment (flexibility to the point of diffusement) with a large grey area in between that is notoriously ambiguous and dependent upon the counsellor, the situation and the client’s changing needs and circumstances.
To be an effective counsellor, one cannot disengage from the client to the extent that the counsellor cannot empathise with the client. That is not the purpose of counselling and is counterproductive to the therapeutic relationship.
However, the counsellor does not want to empathise with the client to the extent that they hug the client upon meeting them or rant and rave with their client in a mutual expression of anger. Nor would the counsellor pop in to visit at the client’s home on their own way home from the office. This is the behaviour of a friend, not a counsellor. Hence, boundary violation has occurred.
Ambiguous boundaries often arise in counselling, but strict responsibilities do apply to the counsellor in relation to their duty to inform clients of the limitations on client confidentiality. Such information forms a large part of informed consent and informed consent is a fundamental client right.
Case Study - Brief Example
Jenny had been seeing her counsellor, David, for two years when she was rushed to hospital for emergency surgery. As she was extremely stressed and upset on the phone, David visited her at the hospital the following day. Jenny was in horrific pain, and David sat in a chair beside her bed and took her hand when she held it out to him. David offered some words of comfort, and after ensuring that the family would be visiting Jenny soon, he left the hospital.
Jenny was aware that this was an exception to her usual counselling sessions with David and it would not be repeated. David’s visit to the hospital simply meant that he cared for her and could appreciate the depth of her pain and vulnerability.
At the first counselling session with Jenny after her discharge from hospital, David took the first few minutes of the session to discuss his visit to the hospital to ensure that Jenny understood fully its place in the context of the therapeutic relationship.
While some counsellors would not have visited Jenny at the hospital, arguing that it took the therapeutic relationship outside of the confines of the office and that the counsellor’s behaviour could have been misinterpreted by the client, many other practitioners believe that a decision must be based on the individual circumstances and the uniqueness of each relationship with each individual client.
The professional manner in which David conducted himself during the hospital visit and later at the first counselling session allowed David to move the boundaries in all good conscience. He was not cavalier about his visit to the hospital, rather he carefully thought out his decision; considering the ramifications and benefits for his client.
His behaviour was appropriate as a professional, in a professional setting, he did not make the mistake of thinking his visit was equal to that of a friend and neither did he behave as a friend. Also, as soon as he was able, he spoke to the client to clarify the visit and remove any possibility of ambiguity or innuendo.
Conclusion
Efficient counsellors recognise that the intense feelings that can rise in the counselling session can often challenge a counsellor’s personal and professional boundaries. Counsellors who understand the serious effects of their own personal power, and how that can be misinterpreted by the client, also take the boundaries of the counselling profession seriously.
When counsellors choose to be flexible regarding boundaries, they do so carefully, having taken into account the ramifications of their flexibility for their client.
------------------
Think it's helpful to me to read this 'cos I've sometimes worried about the boundaries to set while relating to students (particularly in giving them my handphone numbers and receiving smses after work).
lol:)
i'm not a person who looks to grades and achievements and what nots.
of course it's both a good and bad thing.
bad 'cos it means sometimes i don't really care about the end results, which do actually matter and can affect other areas.
good 'cos it means i'm more concerned about the more intangible things in life. joy, well being, people, love.
sometimes it just doesn't make sense to me how the world strives to go forward and forward and forward, and generates more broken families, broken hearts, broken souls.
what good is it for man to gain the whole world, but lose his own soul?
not to say it's a bad thing that the world is going forward...it's just that i think we need to strike that balance, to care for the sick and lost, and in moving forward in advancements.
i guess i'm biased though. haha.
of course it's both a good and bad thing.
bad 'cos it means sometimes i don't really care about the end results, which do actually matter and can affect other areas.
good 'cos it means i'm more concerned about the more intangible things in life. joy, well being, people, love.
sometimes it just doesn't make sense to me how the world strives to go forward and forward and forward, and generates more broken families, broken hearts, broken souls.
what good is it for man to gain the whole world, but lose his own soul?
not to say it's a bad thing that the world is going forward...it's just that i think we need to strike that balance, to care for the sick and lost, and in moving forward in advancements.
i guess i'm biased though. haha.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
do you know that 1 in 6 people will have an episode of mental illness in their lives?
do you know that depression and anxiety disorders are the most common forms of mental illnesses?
you're not alone when you face with negative thoughts that tells you that you're alone in this world. that nobody will ever understand. that nobody cares. that you're not worthy of someone's friendship/love/acceptance. that the world won't care if you don't exist anymore.
these are all lies.
take heart!
God says that He's always with you. He'll never leave you nor forsake you. the Holy Spirit resides by and inside of you.
the community of believers care.
i guess it's important to voice out to others the appreciation we have of them ba :) not to boost egos.. but rather, to remain thankful, and to verbalize that we do care :)
so...
i do care! (though sometimes i may not verbalize it... but i'm here if you need a shoulder to cry on).
and
i need to know that people care too! (so i'd appreciate it a lot if people also tell me that they care :) please do. 'cos the negative thoughts hit me as well. and it gets hard sometimes when nobody verbalize things :) )
yay.
do you know that depression and anxiety disorders are the most common forms of mental illnesses?
you're not alone when you face with negative thoughts that tells you that you're alone in this world. that nobody will ever understand. that nobody cares. that you're not worthy of someone's friendship/love/acceptance. that the world won't care if you don't exist anymore.
these are all lies.
take heart!
God says that He's always with you. He'll never leave you nor forsake you. the Holy Spirit resides by and inside of you.
the community of believers care.
i guess it's important to voice out to others the appreciation we have of them ba :) not to boost egos.. but rather, to remain thankful, and to verbalize that we do care :)
so...
i do care! (though sometimes i may not verbalize it... but i'm here if you need a shoulder to cry on).
and
i need to know that people care too! (so i'd appreciate it a lot if people also tell me that they care :) please do. 'cos the negative thoughts hit me as well. and it gets hard sometimes when nobody verbalize things :) )
yay.
think in the past year and 2 months, God has been breaking down my pride
bit by bit
and showing me the ugly sides of me
bit by bit
and yet it's amazing how God can still work through the time when he breaks down my pride and ugly sides
i know i've grown much in these areas since june, and i thank God for it :)
a sister i was talking to commented to me that there's a new strength she sense in me, a strength in a new vulnerability.
to me it was like O.O
that God can turn weaknesses into strengths
mistakes into times of growth :)
bit by bit
and showing me the ugly sides of me
bit by bit
and yet it's amazing how God can still work through the time when he breaks down my pride and ugly sides
i know i've grown much in these areas since june, and i thank God for it :)
a sister i was talking to commented to me that there's a new strength she sense in me, a strength in a new vulnerability.
to me it was like O.O
that God can turn weaknesses into strengths
mistakes into times of growth :)
Friday, February 19, 2010
putting this song here 'cos it reminds me of what happened to someone i know. she was to about to be married to the guy, then she found out that the guy was cheating on her.
just happened that this song started to play after 听不到 on her cd.
translation by xinying :P
The mtv can be found here
一夜长大 -Fish Leong
末班车回家,雨一直下.
[Taking the last train home, the rain kept falling]
整夜忍的泪,它不听话.
[The tears which i've controlled for the entire night, they're not listening to me]
我不想去擦,就这样吧!
[I don't wish to wipe it away, just let it be]
爱让这女孩,一夜长大,一夜长大.
[Love caused this girl to grow up in a night, to grow up in a night]
想要说的话,竟然忘了啊!
[I've forgotten the words I wanted to say]
我总是很少说,不懂得表达.
[Always not speaking much, I don't know how to express]
分手我不怕,你知道吗?
[Do you know? I'm not afraid of breaking up...]
你知道的啊!只是....
[I think you know... it's just that..]
那几乎成真,我们的家,你真的不想吗?
[Our home that nearly came to be, do you really not want it anymore?]
那这些年的专心无猜,你只当我是朋友吗?
[eh. this line i dunno how to translate the '专心无猜' part. lol
All these years of concentration and trust, did you just treat me as a friend?]
我以为雨声会遮住你的回答,它却那么清楚啊!
[I thought that the train will muffle your answer, who would have thought that it'd be so clear?]
让这个你曾深爱的女孩,一夜长大.
[Causing the girl you once deeply loved, to grow up in a night]
原因一定很多,就随你吧!
[There must have been lots of reasons, I'll just leave it up to you]
究竟为什么,我不管它.
[As to the exact reason why, I'm not interested to find out]
分手我不怕,你知道吗?
[Do you know? I'm not scared of breaking up]
你知道了吧!只是....
[I think you know.. it's just that..]
那几乎成真,我们的家,你再也不想吗.
[Our home that nearly came to be, do you really not want it anymore?]
那这些年的专心无猜,当朋友都不好吗?
[These few years of concentration and trust, can't we even be friends anymore?]
我多想雨中听不清你的回答,它却那么清楚啊!
[How I wished I could not hear your reply in the rain, yet it was so clear to me!]
让这个你曾深爱的女孩,一夜长大.
[Causing the girl whom you once deeply loved, to grow up in a night]
那几乎成真,我们的家,你从此不想吗?
[Our home that nearly came to be, do you not think about it anymore?]
那这些年的专心无猜,你只当我是朋友吗?
[All these years of concentration and trust, did you just treat me as a friend?]
我以为雨中听不见你的回答,它却那么清楚啊!
[I thought I can't hear your reply in the rain, yet it was so clear]
让这个你曾深爱的女孩,一夜长大,一夜长大,一夜长大
[Causing the girl you once loved, to grow up in a night, to grow up in a night, to grow up in a night]
just happened that this song started to play after 听不到 on her cd.
translation by xinying :P
The mtv can be found here
一夜长大 -Fish Leong
末班车回家,雨一直下.
[Taking the last train home, the rain kept falling]
整夜忍的泪,它不听话.
[The tears which i've controlled for the entire night, they're not listening to me]
我不想去擦,就这样吧!
[I don't wish to wipe it away, just let it be]
爱让这女孩,一夜长大,一夜长大.
[Love caused this girl to grow up in a night, to grow up in a night]
想要说的话,竟然忘了啊!
[I've forgotten the words I wanted to say]
我总是很少说,不懂得表达.
[Always not speaking much, I don't know how to express]
分手我不怕,你知道吗?
[Do you know? I'm not afraid of breaking up...]
你知道的啊!只是....
[I think you know... it's just that..]
那几乎成真,我们的家,你真的不想吗?
[Our home that nearly came to be, do you really not want it anymore?]
那这些年的专心无猜,你只当我是朋友吗?
[eh. this line i dunno how to translate the '专心无猜' part. lol
All these years of concentration and trust, did you just treat me as a friend?]
我以为雨声会遮住你的回答,它却那么清楚啊!
[I thought that the train will muffle your answer, who would have thought that it'd be so clear?]
让这个你曾深爱的女孩,一夜长大.
[Causing the girl you once deeply loved, to grow up in a night]
原因一定很多,就随你吧!
[There must have been lots of reasons, I'll just leave it up to you]
究竟为什么,我不管它.
[As to the exact reason why, I'm not interested to find out]
分手我不怕,你知道吗?
[Do you know? I'm not scared of breaking up]
你知道了吧!只是....
[I think you know.. it's just that..]
那几乎成真,我们的家,你再也不想吗.
[Our home that nearly came to be, do you really not want it anymore?]
那这些年的专心无猜,当朋友都不好吗?
[These few years of concentration and trust, can't we even be friends anymore?]
我多想雨中听不清你的回答,它却那么清楚啊!
[How I wished I could not hear your reply in the rain, yet it was so clear to me!]
让这个你曾深爱的女孩,一夜长大.
[Causing the girl whom you once deeply loved, to grow up in a night]
那几乎成真,我们的家,你从此不想吗?
[Our home that nearly came to be, do you not think about it anymore?]
那这些年的专心无猜,你只当我是朋友吗?
[All these years of concentration and trust, did you just treat me as a friend?]
我以为雨中听不见你的回答,它却那么清楚啊!
[I thought I can't hear your reply in the rain, yet it was so clear]
让这个你曾深爱的女孩,一夜长大,一夜长大,一夜长大
[Causing the girl you once loved, to grow up in a night, to grow up in a night, to grow up in a night]
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
facebook is the source of lots of gossip and information. lol.
one of my former project mates is engaged. hoho. after 5 months of being with her bf O.o no. it's not shotgun.
i guess on one hand, i'm happy for her :)
on the other, it's just a little odd to hear of someone getting engaged after just 5 months together. kinda short? :X
------------------------------
i like to use my birth numbers as a gauge for testing out things.
3 is for getting over the initial excitement of things, 7 to allow the mundane-ness and routine-ness of things to set in.
i use it for my own spiritual walk. 3 years, to test if i'm still as excited about God (coincidentally, the third year was when i first had a serious testing of my motive for taking care of people and for staying in Hope). and i'm just finishing my 7th year. hohoho. 7th year was a time of major upheavals :)
but good nevertheless :)
one of my former project mates is engaged. hoho. after 5 months of being with her bf O.o no. it's not shotgun.
i guess on one hand, i'm happy for her :)
on the other, it's just a little odd to hear of someone getting engaged after just 5 months together. kinda short? :X
------------------------------
i like to use my birth numbers as a gauge for testing out things.
3 is for getting over the initial excitement of things, 7 to allow the mundane-ness and routine-ness of things to set in.
i use it for my own spiritual walk. 3 years, to test if i'm still as excited about God (coincidentally, the third year was when i first had a serious testing of my motive for taking care of people and for staying in Hope). and i'm just finishing my 7th year. hohoho. 7th year was a time of major upheavals :)
but good nevertheless :)
gratitude :)
i need to learn to be more grateful :)
------------------------------------
was quite irritated at my sister's friends just now. they popped by at 10pm, and proceeded to make a ruckus in the living room -.-
i dun usually mind people making a ruckus (afterall, i'm sometimes quite noisy myself).. but i don't particularly appreciate people popping by the house at a late hour when
1) no warning was given beforehand
2) i have work tomorrow morning
i can't go and bathe with the people around -.-
so was really quite irritated.
what made it worse was that my mum felt that it was okay -.-
think it got me thinking about fairness and justice once again.
ah well.
perhaps i can't appreciate having a crowd make noise in my house in the middle of the night :P
i just wanted to have a quiet time to think.
wouldn't have minded if it's just one or two people over though.
----------------------------
chi is falling asleep at the doorway. hee.
----------------------------
i need to learn to be more grateful :)
------------------------------------
was quite irritated at my sister's friends just now. they popped by at 10pm, and proceeded to make a ruckus in the living room -.-
i dun usually mind people making a ruckus (afterall, i'm sometimes quite noisy myself).. but i don't particularly appreciate people popping by the house at a late hour when
1) no warning was given beforehand
2) i have work tomorrow morning
i can't go and bathe with the people around -.-
so was really quite irritated.
what made it worse was that my mum felt that it was okay -.-
think it got me thinking about fairness and justice once again.
ah well.
perhaps i can't appreciate having a crowd make noise in my house in the middle of the night :P
i just wanted to have a quiet time to think.
wouldn't have minded if it's just one or two people over though.
----------------------------
chi is falling asleep at the doorway. hee.
----------------------------
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
at the start of june last year, the three of us ventured to tampines ikea for meatballs.
this time, in mid feb, without prior planning, and not as a venture, just 'cos there's a need for dinner, we went to long john's.
cheers to the tongue stickouters (yes, there's no such word. hahaa. and i got them to stick out their tongues. i'm so proud of myself. LOL)!
Monday, February 15, 2010
just came back not ago from watching Big Little Soldier with weiling, jan, ellson, joe, yenling and serene :) enjoyed it very much. hahaa. we wanted to watch valentine's day, but it was like, sold out almost everywhere.. and the next show was for 12.30am... so we switched to this one instead, without anyone knowing much of what the show is about :)
but it was great :D hahaha. it's a chinese action comedy. hahaa. which is not just brainless humour. there were quite a lot of stuff in the plot as well :) makes you laugh, and after that, causes you to think :)
i like :)
i like it how they brought in the perspectives of the two warring states, as well as what it means to be a victim. i like the development of the two main characters, how they both came with their own strong ideals, and act them out, and subsequently, learned to absorb different things they learned from each other as they kept spending time together (due to one being kept captive by the other). i like the way how things developed at an appropriate pace, and i admired how the same joke, used in different situation, still brought about much laughs 'cos it's used slightly differently.
lovely :)
watched 'percy jackson and the lightning thief' yesterday with justin, wanqi, yenling and joe too =) hahaha. and though, yes, (what justin and wanqi will complain about) the plot is relatively predictable, it's still quite enjoyable to see the different mythological characters come to life :) what intrigued me was how i actually knew what those creatures are instinctively! hahahaa.
lovely visuals though :) but it's a super teeny flick. haha.
i wanna watch Alice in Wonderland! :D and i think i don't mind catching 'valentine's day' either :) am also interested in Summar Wars! hahaha. ahhhh. visual pleasure :)
but it was great :D hahaha. it's a chinese action comedy. hahaa. which is not just brainless humour. there were quite a lot of stuff in the plot as well :) makes you laugh, and after that, causes you to think :)
i like :)
i like it how they brought in the perspectives of the two warring states, as well as what it means to be a victim. i like the development of the two main characters, how they both came with their own strong ideals, and act them out, and subsequently, learned to absorb different things they learned from each other as they kept spending time together (due to one being kept captive by the other). i like the way how things developed at an appropriate pace, and i admired how the same joke, used in different situation, still brought about much laughs 'cos it's used slightly differently.
lovely :)
watched 'percy jackson and the lightning thief' yesterday with justin, wanqi, yenling and joe too =) hahaha. and though, yes, (what justin and wanqi will complain about) the plot is relatively predictable, it's still quite enjoyable to see the different mythological characters come to life :) what intrigued me was how i actually knew what those creatures are instinctively! hahahaa.
lovely visuals though :) but it's a super teeny flick. haha.
i wanna watch Alice in Wonderland! :D and i think i don't mind catching 'valentine's day' either :) am also interested in Summar Wars! hahaha. ahhhh. visual pleasure :)
Sunday, February 14, 2010
went for a little watson's shopping just now after half-packing my room :)
(chi's asleep. she's been waiting the whole night for me, falling asleep at times, waking up at others to look at me, and then subsequently falling asleep again. silly cat.)
haven't gone to watson's to look around for some time. think it helps me to relax and think. some actions i do or places i go to, probably 'cos of memories attached, helps me to relax and think. hahaha.
okay.falling asleep. i shld sleep soon :) it's 5.30am.
----------------------------
i guess, that in a sense, is a resolution :) i'm over the emotional refractory period. and over apathy.
(chi's asleep. she's been waiting the whole night for me, falling asleep at times, waking up at others to look at me, and then subsequently falling asleep again. silly cat.)
haven't gone to watson's to look around for some time. think it helps me to relax and think. some actions i do or places i go to, probably 'cos of memories attached, helps me to relax and think. hahaha.
okay.falling asleep. i shld sleep soon :) it's 5.30am.
----------------------------
i guess, that in a sense, is a resolution :) i'm over the emotional refractory period. and over apathy.
Saturday, February 13, 2010
i think i haven't had the time to make sense of things :)
and i guess along the way, i realized i don't know what to make sense of.
Is there anything to make sense of?
Or is it merely to deal with the changes that come along the way?
And what changes are they?
Are there changes?
Life seems to go on as per normal.
And after the outpouring of emotions, there's nothing much left to pour.
and there's nothing to say
and there seems to be nothing to make sense of.
i guess what's worrying is the lack of strong emotions ba.
it's like having a glass lid over a pot of boiling waters. you can see it's boiling, or rather you believe it should be boiling, but it's not.
and it's all dulled.
and matted.
and glossed over.
and you sit by yourself just observing.
bemused by the lack of reaction.
i know there was a short period of time i wanted to be angry.
but i realized that i couldn't.
and another period of time when i wanted to be sad, but what's the use in that?
i hope i get out of this state of apathy soon :)
actions without emotions make for boring non-memorable days.
and i guess along the way, i realized i don't know what to make sense of.
Is there anything to make sense of?
Or is it merely to deal with the changes that come along the way?
And what changes are they?
Are there changes?
Life seems to go on as per normal.
And after the outpouring of emotions, there's nothing much left to pour.
and there's nothing to say
and there seems to be nothing to make sense of.
i guess what's worrying is the lack of strong emotions ba.
it's like having a glass lid over a pot of boiling waters. you can see it's boiling, or rather you believe it should be boiling, but it's not.
and it's all dulled.
and matted.
and glossed over.
and you sit by yourself just observing.
bemused by the lack of reaction.
i know there was a short period of time i wanted to be angry.
but i realized that i couldn't.
and another period of time when i wanted to be sad, but what's the use in that?
i hope i get out of this state of apathy soon :)
actions without emotions make for boring non-memorable days.
Friday, February 12, 2010
i am TOTALLY not in the mood to work!
LOL!
shucks.
so jialat.
i have been looking at photos the whole morning :\
justin showed me a pre-wedding photo of his friend, and ever since then i've been browsing through all the other photos of the photographers -.-
quite excited. could be 'cos of the day :) cny eve eve. hahaha.
or maybe it's 'cos i received 2 invitations yesterday. LOL. within 5 mins of each other -.-
so excited for my colleagues! :D Jimmy and Sarah :D they're two very nice people :D hahaa.
worked closely with Jimmy 'cos of his kids. we went for 7 home visits together :\ he's a very very nice person :) very caring for his students too. hahaa.
(i can't help laughing at the songs which are playing through the PA system. LOL. an english translated version of the cny songs. LOL. 'merry merry day, merry merry time...' hahahaa. SUPER FUNNY!)
i guess i'm quite excited 'cos they're both funny people :) doesn't it make you want to bless them much when you know the couple personally? :) feels joyful to know that they're getting married as well :)
i guess the most amusing part to me was that they're getting married on my birthday. hohoho. (and yes, i told Jimmy about it)
the second invitation came from my supervisor. hahaa. dinner invitation O.o
but this one's further away :) haha. and i guess 'cos i don't know my vp very well.. so.. and they've already rom-ed... so.. technically, it's just more of a formality they're going through ba :)
hee :)
MPH at raffles city having renovation sales! :D hahahaha.
i bought one of the 'sandman mystery theatre' books and 'fallen angels - down to earth' (could hardly find graphic novels :( ) at $6 each ( :D:D:D:D:D ) and stardust by neil gaiman at $3 (the movie novel version though). hahahaa.
but books are ALL on discount! :D:D:D
hahhaha :)
tempted to buy some children's storybooks... (e.g. howl's moving castle. yes i know i've read it before.. but still.. nothing beats keeping the book :X and its SEQUEL. yes it has a SEQUEL. two sequels actually. hahaha. but in the end decided not to 'cos ... well. i might not get ard to reading them .....)
thanks wanqi for bringing me there :) hahaha.
tempted to stay there and read books. work doesn't permit me the luxury though. hoho.
glad tt at least i get to do so in heaven. haha :P
MPH at raffles city having renovation sales! :D hahahaha.
i bought one of the 'sandman mystery theatre' books and 'fallen angels - down to earth' (could hardly find graphic novels :( ) at $6 each ( :D:D:D:D:D ) and stardust by neil gaiman at $3 (the movie novel version though). hahahaa.
but books are ALL on discount! :D:D:D
hahhaha :)
tempted to buy some children's storybooks... (e.g. howl's moving castle. yes i know i've read it before.. but still.. nothing beats keeping the book :X and its SEQUEL. yes it has a SEQUEL. two sequels actually. hahaha. but in the end decided not to 'cos ... well. i might not get ard to reading them .....)
thanks wanqi for bringing me there :) hahaha.
tempted to stay there and read books. work doesn't permit me the luxury though. hoho.
glad tt at least i get to do so in heaven. haha :P
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Someone commented on this person's attempt to take a photo for 365 days of her life, so i kaypohed and went to look at it. quite like the photos taken :) so i koped (considering tt justin mentioned before something along the lines of us having no rights to the uploaded photos on facebook.. or issit tt facebook has the rights to your photos? at any rate, it just means i can kope them).
but do note that these photos don't belong to me :)
i quite liked the style of using photos to say things as well.
getting tired of words.
so let's leave the words aside for a day (and yet i'm still typing away).
withdraw.
but do note that these photos don't belong to me :)
i quite liked the style of using photos to say things as well.
getting tired of words.
so let's leave the words aside for a day (and yet i'm still typing away).
withdraw.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Monday, February 08, 2010
today's the day of meeting people (intentionally and unintentionally. hahaha)
i was at yio chu kang mrt station waiting for the train..and as the train pulls into the station, in the glass panel in front of me when the trained stopped, i saw a familiar head and familiar clothes. turns out really to be David.
haha. he was like '有这么巧吗？'
then...
met venetia to catch up and to talk :)
then went to nlb (was originally in nlb before meeting ven) to finish reading 'a season of mists' by neil gaiman (haven't had the time, nor the money, to go and buy the 4th book of the sandman series :D LOL. figured i'd go and finish up the series at the library, and possibly buy them in the future for keepsake. i prefer buying and reading though.. smells so much nicer. nicer to finger through too. hmm. maybe i shld save up to buy it. hmmm). and saw weiling. hoho. just happened tt she sat down on the same couch as i did. hohoho.
sleepy :\
i was at yio chu kang mrt station waiting for the train..and as the train pulls into the station, in the glass panel in front of me when the trained stopped, i saw a familiar head and familiar clothes. turns out really to be David.
haha. he was like '有这么巧吗？'
then...
met venetia to catch up and to talk :)
then went to nlb (was originally in nlb before meeting ven) to finish reading 'a season of mists' by neil gaiman (haven't had the time, nor the money, to go and buy the 4th book of the sandman series :D LOL. figured i'd go and finish up the series at the library, and possibly buy them in the future for keepsake. i prefer buying and reading though.. smells so much nicer. nicer to finger through too. hmm. maybe i shld save up to buy it. hmmm). and saw weiling. hoho. just happened tt she sat down on the same couch as i did. hohoho.
sleepy :\
Today is the day You have made
i will rejoice and be glad in it
today is the day You have made
i will rejoice and be glad in it
i won't worry about tomorrow
i'm giving You my fears and sorrow
where You lead i will follow
i'm trusting in all You say
today is the day!
:D
there's a friend of mine
who's very intriguing
he takes people's feelings into account when he makes decisions.. and sometimes take a long time to make a certain decision (which kinda frustrates me at times 'cos my natural desire is to confront :P of course, having a desire to confront doesn't mean i'd actually go and do that. hur)
anyway, (and at this moment i'm wondering why i'm typing this post. haha) i guess maybe all i wanted to do is to say that i've learned much from him and i treasure him as a friend :)
friendships are so vital to life :)
i will rejoice and be glad in it
today is the day You have made
i will rejoice and be glad in it
i won't worry about tomorrow
i'm giving You my fears and sorrow
where You lead i will follow
i'm trusting in all You say
today is the day!
:D
there's a friend of mine
who's very intriguing
he takes people's feelings into account when he makes decisions.. and sometimes take a long time to make a certain decision (which kinda frustrates me at times 'cos my natural desire is to confront :P of course, having a desire to confront doesn't mean i'd actually go and do that. hur)
anyway, (and at this moment i'm wondering why i'm typing this post. haha) i guess maybe all i wanted to do is to say that i've learned much from him and i treasure him as a friend :)
friendships are so vital to life :)
Thursday, February 04, 2010
just got to know tonight that two people i know are exploring. hahaha. somehow i feel very happy for them :X
the brother was caught by us 'cos we saw something he bought. hohoho :X
okie :)
at any rate, i dunno why i feel so happy knowing tt they're together :X hahaa. maybe 'cos it's been a year and a half since i thought tt they'll make a nice couple :X
haha :) ah well :)
went to campus crusade bookstore recently to do some exchanging of bible thing :) and saw some lifeguides (bible study books) which looked pretty interesting :D i got psalms, spiritual disciplines and parables. quite ex though >_< was reading the one on psalms and found it interesting!
it says tt we have to keep in mind that the Psalms are poetry and the Psalms are prayers.. and went on to expound a little on its significance to us.. that how psalms being poetry use words to drag us into reality itself.. that it is a language that gets at the heart of existence, and that in Psalms we can expect to find, exposed and sharpened, what it means to be human beings before God.
Psalms being prayer means it's a language used in relation to God. we don't learn the Psalms till we are praying them.
which i think was an interesting perspective to me.. 'cos i've always used Psalms to describe my emotions and feelings, to pray to God using these words when i am (usually in times of anguish) wordless. but the poetry aspect reminds me that even as i pray psalms, i deal with my actual humanity as well. the guilt, the bitterness, the joy, the exhilaration.
:)
the brother was caught by us 'cos we saw something he bought. hohoho :X
okie :)
at any rate, i dunno why i feel so happy knowing tt they're together :X hahaa. maybe 'cos it's been a year and a half since i thought tt they'll make a nice couple :X
haha :) ah well :)
went to campus crusade bookstore recently to do some exchanging of bible thing :) and saw some lifeguides (bible study books) which looked pretty interesting :D i got psalms, spiritual disciplines and parables. quite ex though >_< was reading the one on psalms and found it interesting!
it says tt we have to keep in mind that the Psalms are poetry and the Psalms are prayers.. and went on to expound a little on its significance to us.. that how psalms being poetry use words to drag us into reality itself.. that it is a language that gets at the heart of existence, and that in Psalms we can expect to find, exposed and sharpened, what it means to be human beings before God.
Psalms being prayer means it's a language used in relation to God. we don't learn the Psalms till we are praying them.
which i think was an interesting perspective to me.. 'cos i've always used Psalms to describe my emotions and feelings, to pray to God using these words when i am (usually in times of anguish) wordless. but the poetry aspect reminds me that even as i pray psalms, i deal with my actual humanity as well. the guilt, the bitterness, the joy, the exhilaration.
:)
Wednesday, February 03, 2010
ah. the singer of friendships, love songs and breakups is married!
haha.
watching the video of their wedding now.
quite interesting :)
haha.
watching the video of their wedding now.
quite interesting :)
Monday, February 01, 2010
Taken from an article online:
Are cats loners? Will a tom cat kill his kittens if he gets the chance? Why do cats always seem to make a beeline for the one person in the room who doesn’t like cats? Here are the answers to some common cat-related questions.
Myth: Cats Demand Attention When Their Owners are on the Phone Because They’re Jealous.
Fact: The cat hears her owner talking on the phone and because there is no one else in the room, she assumes that the owner is talking to her and responds accordingly.
Myth: Cats Sulk When They’ve Been Scolded.
Fact: Staring is perceived as a challenge among cats. A cat that has been scolded feels inferior and possibly fearful as well. He will turn away and avoid looking at his owner because he doesn’t want to provoke any further hostility. Walking away and refusing to make eye contact is a sign of surrender rather than passive-aggressive anger.
Myth: Feeding a Cat Well will Cause Her to Lose Her Hunting Skills.
Fact: Hunting is both an instinct and a talent. All cats have the instinct to hunt. Cats train their kittens to hunt, and they practice hunting skills with cat toys, household objects, or other animals and people in the household. Some cats are naturally better hunters than others, but this has nothing to do with how much they are fed.
Myth: If a Cat Pees on the Floor, Rubbing His Nose in the Mess will Prevent Future Problems.
Fact: Rubbing a cat’s nose in it will actually increase the likelihood of future accidents because it increases the anxiety that may have caused the problem in the first place.
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Myth: Cats Like to Torment Those Who Dislike or Fear Them.
Fact: Those who like cats tend to stare at them, whereas cats perceive a direct stare as a challenge, particularly from people they don’t know well, and whose reactions they can’t anticipate as easily. Thus, the cat makes a beeline for the one person in the room who is not staring at her.
Myth: Female White Cats are Not Good Mothers.
Fact: Many cats with white fur and blue eyes are deaf, and thus may not hear the calls of their kittens. However, deaf cats can be good mothers because they become sensitive to sound vibrations and visual cues in order to compensate for the handicap.
Myth: Cats Only Purr if They’re Happy.
Fact: Cats that are sick or in pain will purr, both to speed the healing process and to appease any potential aggressors. A cat that feels threatened may also purr in the hopes of diffusing the other’s aggression. A cat may even purr when dying.
Myth: Tom Cats Will Always Kill Kittens.
Tom cat behaviour is highly variable. A male cat may ignore his kittens, care for them, or kill them. Often, he’s not given the chance to show what he would do because the mother cat drives him away. However, if he’s allowed to interact with them, a tom cat may actually take good care of his kittens. Tom cats have been observed guarding their offspring and even supplying them with food, and there are a couple of explanations for this behaviour. A tom cat may nurture his kittens because he has feelings for them, or he may do it to encourage the mother cat to become less involved with them and thus go into heat sooner, providing another mating opportunity.
Myth: Cats Are Solitary Creatures.
Fact: Among barn cats and feral cats, cats hunt alone, but usually live in a matrilineal colony that includes a mother cat and her daughters and granddaughters. Male cats tend to leave the clans when they are around 18 months old to go off in search of fertile, unrelated females.
Domesticated kittens that are not taken away from their littermates for at least 10 weeks after birth are more likely to be comfortable living in multicat households as adults. Those taken away too soon often have trouble getting along with other cats because they have been deprived of socialization opportunities with their siblings.
Myth: Cats Use Their Whiskers for Balance.
Fact: Whiskers act as feelers; they have no effect on balance. A cat uses her whiskers to judge whether or not she’ll fit through an opening, to navigate around obstacles in the dark, to locate prey when hunting, and to kill prey quickly and cleanly. A cat’s whiskers should never be removed or trimmed.
Are cats loners? Will a tom cat kill his kittens if he gets the chance? Why do cats always seem to make a beeline for the one person in the room who doesn’t like cats? Here are the answers to some common cat-related questions.
Myth: Cats Demand Attention When Their Owners are on the Phone Because They’re Jealous.
Fact: The cat hears her owner talking on the phone and because there is no one else in the room, she assumes that the owner is talking to her and responds accordingly.
Myth: Cats Sulk When They’ve Been Scolded.
Fact: Staring is perceived as a challenge among cats. A cat that has been scolded feels inferior and possibly fearful as well. He will turn away and avoid looking at his owner because he doesn’t want to provoke any further hostility. Walking away and refusing to make eye contact is a sign of surrender rather than passive-aggressive anger.
Myth: Feeding a Cat Well will Cause Her to Lose Her Hunting Skills.
Fact: Hunting is both an instinct and a talent. All cats have the instinct to hunt. Cats train their kittens to hunt, and they practice hunting skills with cat toys, household objects, or other animals and people in the household. Some cats are naturally better hunters than others, but this has nothing to do with how much they are fed.
Myth: If a Cat Pees on the Floor, Rubbing His Nose in the Mess will Prevent Future Problems.
Fact: Rubbing a cat’s nose in it will actually increase the likelihood of future accidents because it increases the anxiety that may have caused the problem in the first place.
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Veterinary Acupuncture Training RACE Approved Continuing Education
www.tcvm.com
Professional Pet Photos
Let us capture precious moments for you and your pets in Singapore
www.white-roomstudio.com/pets.html
Myth: Cats Like to Torment Those Who Dislike or Fear Them.
Fact: Those who like cats tend to stare at them, whereas cats perceive a direct stare as a challenge, particularly from people they don’t know well, and whose reactions they can’t anticipate as easily. Thus, the cat makes a beeline for the one person in the room who is not staring at her.
Myth: Female White Cats are Not Good Mothers.
Fact: Many cats with white fur and blue eyes are deaf, and thus may not hear the calls of their kittens. However, deaf cats can be good mothers because they become sensitive to sound vibrations and visual cues in order to compensate for the handicap.
Myth: Cats Only Purr if They’re Happy.
Fact: Cats that are sick or in pain will purr, both to speed the healing process and to appease any potential aggressors. A cat that feels threatened may also purr in the hopes of diffusing the other’s aggression. A cat may even purr when dying.
Myth: Tom Cats Will Always Kill Kittens.
Tom cat behaviour is highly variable. A male cat may ignore his kittens, care for them, or kill them. Often, he’s not given the chance to show what he would do because the mother cat drives him away. However, if he’s allowed to interact with them, a tom cat may actually take good care of his kittens. Tom cats have been observed guarding their offspring and even supplying them with food, and there are a couple of explanations for this behaviour. A tom cat may nurture his kittens because he has feelings for them, or he may do it to encourage the mother cat to become less involved with them and thus go into heat sooner, providing another mating opportunity.
Myth: Cats Are Solitary Creatures.
Fact: Among barn cats and feral cats, cats hunt alone, but usually live in a matrilineal colony that includes a mother cat and her daughters and granddaughters. Male cats tend to leave the clans when they are around 18 months old to go off in search of fertile, unrelated females.
Domesticated kittens that are not taken away from their littermates for at least 10 weeks after birth are more likely to be comfortable living in multicat households as adults. Those taken away too soon often have trouble getting along with other cats because they have been deprived of socialization opportunities with their siblings.
Myth: Cats Use Their Whiskers for Balance.
Fact: Whiskers act as feelers; they have no effect on balance. A cat uses her whiskers to judge whether or not she’ll fit through an opening, to navigate around obstacles in the dark, to locate prey when hunting, and to kill prey quickly and cleanly. A cat’s whiskers should never be removed or trimmed.