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The Potion Maker
crazypootium is a cloudy, crumbly mauve solid derived from the heart of a mountain goat.
Mix with crazypoot! Username:
Yet another fun meme brought to you by rfreebern

The Potion Maker
daisytootsium is a cloudy, frangible gold solid derived from the flesh of a hawk.
crazypootium is a cloudy, crumbly mauve solid derived from the heart of a mountain goat.
Mixing daisytootsium with crazypootium causes a violent chemical reaction, producing a milky opalescent potion which gives the user protection from angry glares.
Yet another fun meme brought to you by rfreebern

ah. well:)
last tutorials of the year...mr chan's still going to be out civics tutor...but i do wonder about mr ho and mr lim...are they following us up too?:) mr lim's very nice...he offered to help us during the hols for repaper:) mr toh really went to buy us chocolates...hahaha:) so funny:D he said next time if we see him on the street, don't call him Mr Toh...call him leslie or pee lee (??) 'cos he doesn't want the people to know he's a teacher. hmmmm:)
had shepherding today:) it's always good to talk to junting:) thankful for my shepherd:)
still missing clover:) like this morning when i woke up and want to go pat clover's head, then i realised she's not there anymore...and after i come back home i'll always go and announce my presence to her, i can't do that anymore either. mum asked me if i want to buy another one...i told her not yet. ('cos i threw away the cage, the water bottle, the wheel... gotta buy new ones:). well.

lotsa changes coming up...
school's decided to start the house system next yr 'cos there's going to be the odd combinations in 2006. what with 3 H2s and 1 H1 being the minimum... whole messy business which i dun quite grasp...ah well:) we get to choose the house names since we're the first batch to have this change!:D some teacher suggested Gem, ruby... mrs chan suggested superman, batman... and thong kheng was talking in class about what would guys feel being in a house called Aphrodite (goddess of love?)... dominique suggested gucci, prada (hahha!) lynette suggested our OG names (special meaning) and i was thinking about the colours of the rainbow:)
another change came about just now...my dear hamster clover died at 10pm. dun think i'll quite forget the last few moments spent with her. buried her just now... ah well:(
heart's lighter now though. was singing songs to God just now...He truly is my pillar of strength when i am weak.

-who makes the sun light up my shadows
when the darkness tries to follow me-
*grInz* today was a day of drifting about:) (phrase suggested by Mr Lim) went through the lectures, tutorials... pace set by teachers are rather slow these days:) our class seems to be quite hyper during mr toh's class though. hahaha:) told him that since our class is the first official class he took, and since he's not teaching us next year, then maybe he can take us out to eat:D sort of as a last gathering. suggestion placed forwards included marche's (lynnette suggested it!):D i told him we can all go and eat, then pretend to lose the card, then we'll only need to pay $100:D *hehehe*
-who makes the air that brings me life
so i can breathe the love that's given to me-
feels this urge to apply to SMU for uni courses next time instead of our dear traditional NUS... 'cos the representative from SMU was so upbeat about life and in describing the college and what-nots about everyone will get a chance to go on an exchange programme and that sometimes, we have to love what we do:) cliched stuff but in comparison with what the other people said, it seemed more interesting:) i want to do bio!
-who makes the waters of my sorrow part
and leads the gladness into my heart-
cca's gradually starting once more:) discussing the details of hai cheng tomorrow:) can just imagine the amount of work we need to do for next year:D doing a production all by ourselves :D the work of 20+ people:D can we make it?:D yup!
-who makes the river runs that wash away
and cleans my soul to make a new start-
anyway, f.y.i, the song that has been running through this post is called 'You' by Jaci Valasquez:) quite a nice song:) liked it a lot when i was in sec4:) saw it again recently, like it even more now:D
-You make everything good, everything wonderful
You grace my days and heaven fills my view
let's forever sing
You make everything pure, everything beautiful
You make me see the only thing that's true
it's You-

oooh... i haven't updated for ... 4 days:)
ah wellz.
dun seem to have much fate with teachers and marks these days...there's been a severe mis-communication between me and the chinese teacher. 'cos my chinese marks were wrongly stated and i told mr chan, then mr chan told the chinese teacher. then the chinese teacher came to find me in the morning and proceeded to reprimand me for not checking the marks properly and what-nots. the funny thing is that i don't remember checking the marks at all:)
then during break she saw me near the toilet, then she started to ask in a very irritated voice where my answer scripts are and then she said that she has asked someone to tell me to pass it to her quickly (i didn't receive that message either)...then she accused me of skipping lessons and what-nots and didn't believe me when i said i attended every lesson after the promos ( i mean like, why should i skip? it's my best sub:P)
ah well. i admit i didn't really behave in an biblical manner (heh). hating to be accused (this is one of my two hates:( ), i retorted back that i didn't skip lessons and what-nots and that all the classmates can vouch for me and that i really didn't get a chance to check my marks. think i got a little emotional:P (really really dislike people accusing me of something i didn't do). trying to sing 'there is joy in the Lord' in my heart didn't seem to lower my emotions. (but it did cause me to remember to soften my tone)
was sitting in the general office waiting for someone (:D) when i just took out the book with all the teachings and happened to turn to the teaching on humility. then kinda recalled that proverbs 12:16 stated that 'A fool shows his annoyance at once, but a prudent man overlooks an insult'. felt like a fool then. kinda shows some hidden aspects of my character i've gotta edit. ah well:D better to see it now than later:)
anyway, after checking with juncheng and peilee, it turns out they checked the results immediately after getting back the bio results. and on that day, after the bio results, me, steph and lydia went to talk to mr basil chan...and when we went for chinese lessons, everyone had finished and were already nicely seated. that's why we didn't get to check our results:) serious case of miscommunication. so coincidental too.

we saw Mr Hannis(nyjc econs lecturer:D) today! hahaha:)
'cos VJ had a friendly soccer match against RJ today, then OVA (we guess that it stands for Old Victorians Association) had a friendly soccer match against ORA (Old Rafflesians Association) too:D and apparently Mr Hannis was from RJ. hahha:) we called him and he saw us and waved to us.
OVA against ORA was quite amusing 'cos there're actually more people walking about than running...then Mr Tan was at the side commenting that they can't run anymore and what-nots. quite amusing:D Mr Seet played too! he's like...the most enthusiastic player already, but the ball doesn't seem to have much affinity with him:D hehe.

This certifies that I, xinying, Have Become Cooler Than I was Before

You too can Become Cooler at flooble

-still i would wanna be
someone who'd answer to me
someone, who sees like a child, gives like a saint, feels like an angel
nevermind the broken wings and
speaks like a picture, cries like the rain, shines like the star
as long as the fire remains-
those lyrics came from the song 'someone' by stephanie sun:)
hahaha:D feeling very happy. had some peace and quiet just now...whole house to myself! family's at some wedding dinner somewhere:) i'd much rather have the whole house to myself than the wedding dinner. extremely rare chance. haha:)
the night seems to be still young. i shall attempt vectors tutorial 2 without any notes. have a nice day:D

ah!:) had an inspiring testimony shared by Mr Lim today:D *grInz*
he had 236 for PSLE...then came into VJ...then got only 3 Os and a pass for his midyears...then he thought to himself 'hmm. not very good.' so he studied EXTRA HARD and then at the end of the year, he got A,A,B,B. took the S papers for maths and chem, following yr prelims, his S papers got a merit and a fail...*grInz*...BUT, at A levels, he got 4As and 2 distinctions. hahaha:)
now...if he, all of us can too!:D so, shall work EXTRA HARD from now on:) yup. oh forgot to mention. He was a basketball player, got the Colours award, learnt guitar too, had a girlfriend during then and is a christian too:D
rather amazing how his grades jumped SO MUCh. gracious. whole class was terribly amazed and kinda in awe. hahaha:) 'cos he doesn't look like that type of person:)
i guess one never knows what one can do with God's strength behind him:D

thank God i managed to scrape past. been praying and praying to just get promoted (can't really hope for too much looking at the stupid papers). really really really thankful:)
though for this exam, everything's that supposed to go wrong went alright, while everything that's supposed to be alright went terribly wrong. (with the exception of maths, gp and chinese:) i thought i've only attempted like a third of my case study for econs, in the end, i passed my case study. i thought i can do okaily for my econs essays, and in the end, they disappointed me greatly. haha:) quite amusing. and to think that i didn't much study for econs and studied like nuts for bio...and in the end, i got 9 marks higher for econs than my bio. not fun. not fun at all.
teachers were very nice today. especially mr ho. hahaha:) he was like...exceptionally nice. said that he saw people in some other classes crying, then commented that he just saw a guy crying nearby or something. then he said he was quite surprised 'cos it's a guy and all that. then he said that could be due to gp or something ('cos gp compre was very horrid this time and in some other classes, a lot of pple didn't pass ... they got less than 45 marks) then he said that in comparison with the other alphabet classes, he's quite okay with our marks (:P) he shared that there are students who got A in midyrs and got an O this time...then he said that there was a student who got 60++ for his midyrs but got 30+ for promos..and he told him straight in the face that the guy deserved it 'cos he had been sleeping in class. haha:) and he told our class at least no one in this class deserved him to say that to. at least that's something nice. he also asked if anyone of us is emotionally unstable. which was...relatively amusing:D
and mr chan was very sweet today too. promised to help me search for one more mark for econs (the impt of 1 mark!) and he talked a bit to us too:)
i think i'm just going to keep praying and praying now for u, steph:) if my prayer was answered, yours will be too!:)

can't remember how to sing the first part of this song...can someone help?

"Love song for a saviour" - jars of clay
In open fields of wild flowers,
she breathes the air and flies away
She thanks her Jesus for the daises and the roses
in no simple language
Someday she'll understand the meaning of it all
He's more than the laughter or the stars in the heavens
As close a heartbeat or a song on her lips
Someday she'll trust Him and learn how to see Him
Someday He'll call her and she will come running
and fall in His arms and the tears will fall down and she'll pray,

"I want to fall in love with You
I want to fall in love with You
I want to fall in love with You
I want to fall in love with You"

Sitting silent wearing Sunday best
The sermon echoes through the walls
A great salvation through it calls to the people
who stare into nowhere, and can't feel the chains on their souls

He's more than the laughter or the stars in the heavens
As close a heartbeat or a song on our lips
Someday we'll trust Him and learn how to see Him
Someday He'll call us and we will come running
and fall in His arms and the tears will fall down and we'll pray,

"I want to fall in love with You"

It seems too easy to call you "Savior",
Not close enough to call you "God"
So as I sit and think of words I can mention
to show my devotion

"I want to fall in love with You"

"my heart beats for You"

-let's talk about *cough cough* baby, let's talk about you and me, let's talk about all the good things and the bad things there may be-
let's talk about today, baby!:D
hahaha. okay. nvm. going a bit mad:) just finished reading one of agatha christie's mysteries... (yesyes i know it's primary sch material...but it's nice!!!) quite a nice twist at the back:) book is called 'why didn't they ask Evans?' ah well.
anyway. anyway. anyway.
some of the north sisters were wearing their secondary school uniform today:D hahaha. quite amusing. surprisingly, they still can fit in and still looks like they do fit into the uniform:D as if they're still sec 4 students. ah wellz:D
carrie's birthday today:) wanted to tell her thankz for bringing me to service. but never really got the chance to 'cos me, jits, huichun and christina (hmmmz:D) have got to leave to wash cups. mini cute lil' cups containing simple-looking drinkable liquid saturated with intense meaning. missed the birthday celebrations though:D was nice that all of us got together to celebrate her birthday:) *beamz*

yup. anyway. vj open house was yesterday!:D rocks!:D hahaha. theme of the year is Larc En Ciel...which means colours of the rainbow:) went to school early in the morning to practice taekwondo 'cos i didn't practice with them on friday afternoon and vanessa asked me to take her place 'cos she's gotta do ushering:) luckily we practiced...'cos i forgot the last few steps of the white-yellow stance. hahaha:) then rushed down to help chinese society with that booth, commented that it looks extremely chinese, bought kacang puteh from the Biz Club (they cheated my money. there was a buy 1 get 1 free deal in the goodie bag), then rushed back up.
actually was rushing about during the whole open house:) but it was fun:D did mass dance for two times throughout the day (for the first one, we thought that taekwondo demonstration was going to start already, so we didn't join in) mass dance rocks!:D it's like victorians will all gather together at the link bridge, then u have the whole group of us dancing in unison and cheering whilst everyone else looks at you. and surprisingly, mass dance steps that i can remember came fast and furious to me...and those that i can't, i just follow quite easily too:) wish we can do that everyday. hahhaa:D
let me go further back in time and talk about friday's farewell assembly:) it was quite interesting...we had the dance club performing a dance to the chicago music while a bat was flying above their heads (haha!), two pple singing their own composed songs (complete with music. hmm. think country rock style:D) and some other stuff i can't remember. then we had an ice cream eating competition where mr li shocked all of us by scooping with his hand and finishing 500ml in ... 22 seconds! hehe:) then school went nuts and asked us to sing auld lang syne (???) and you can really feel the school spirit when we all turned to the crest and sang the school song (last time for the J2s)....then after all that came... (what else but...)...mass dance!:D hahaa:) couldn't do couple dance 'cos lydia didn't know the dance and i had no partner:P anyway, saw alywin and kenneth doing the dance together. and they were mashing potatoes like nobody's business. looks so......... (hahhaa:) mad classmates. (yeah. for pple who don't know what mashed potatoes is... ehz. ask a vj person next time. not me though.)
ohohoh! i nearly forgot the very nice clips they showed. school made this wonderful presentation about the '03 graduating batch. hahaa:) said that they're the SARS generation. one of the S represents sexy, suave and something i can't remember either, A for 'ass-tounding', R for 'rebellious (very) and the other S i can't recall. and they had this clip that goes to the music of 'always look on the bright side of life' where they filmed teachers with their heads nodding to the music, and pretending to whistle. very amusing!:D

i feel like just going off to bed, snuggle my head into the pillow, hug the bolster and just sleep, not bothering to do anything else:D *grInz*
very sleepy:( too many sleep bugs trying to bother me. hahaha:)
went down to mj open house yesterday to help a bit:) think God knew that i don't really like going anywhere unfamiliar on my own...so He sent Jacqueline to me:D quite interesting. 'cos i went to the bus stop, then she came to the same bus-stop as me. then it happens that we're taking the same bus, then to the same place, same destination!:D took 31 to tanah merah 'cos she says it's less crowded there...then to pasir ris:) got to know her more too:D
oh dear. i need to go sleep. shall update next time:D ehhehehe:)

free ice cream tomorrow! whoooosh!:D anyway. going to watch pi1 li4 huo3, so no time to update for now:D something iso sent.

Even though I clutch my blanket and growl when the alarm rings.
Thank you, Lord, that I can hear. There are many who are deaf.

Even though I keep my eyes closed against the morning light as
long as possible.
Thank you, Lord, that I can see. Many are blind.

Even though I huddle in my bed and put off rising.
Thank you,Lord, that I have the strength to rise. There are many who are bedridden.

Even though the first hour of my day is hectic, when socks arelost,
toast is burned and tempers are short, my children are so loud.
Thank you, Lord, for my family. There are many who are lonely.

Even though our breakfast table never looks like the pictures in
magazines and the menu is at times unbalanced.
Thank you, Lord, for the food we have. There are many who are hungry.

Even though the routine of my job often is monotonous.
Thank you, Lord, for the opportunity to work. There are many who have no job.

Even though I grumble and bemoan my fate from day to day and wish my circumstances were not so modest.
Thank you, Lord, for life.

hohumm:D
watched 'so close' again this morning. there're definitely certain subtle elements in it. but nevertheless, it's a wonderful show:D got 'Lavender' from steph, shall watch it when i'm free:) the second disc of 'state of divinity' can't be read. so odd. (never touched the first few discs 'cos i watched from episode 10+ onwards) all chinese shows. haha:)
anyway, went to corinne's house to make earrings today:) made 7 pairs! we should really start selling earrings. maybe that can earn some money for the cbf too:) my blue 'dragonfly' earring dropped off though.so now only the yellow one is left. so disappointing...to think that's my only pair of different coloured earrings:P
very happy today:) 'cos i walked to corinne's house...then saw new places and a different route to get to the same destination. saw where cedar is too:) took one hour to walk from toa payoh to her house though:) walked past this church called the Calvary baptist church or something...then the song 'O mighty cross' popped into my mind:) actually, i kinda sang songs most of the way there...'cos got quite a long stretch to potong pasir is quite deserted. no human beings in sight. hahaha:)
i wish i have more times like this...exploring around:D *grInz* ah well. for now i can only make do with knowing how to walk to corinne's house, potong pasir and junction 8. well well.

A boy was sitting on a park bench with one hand resting on an open Bible. He was loudly exclaiming his praise to God. "Hallelujah! Hallelujah! God is great!" he yelled without worrying whether anyone heard him or not.
Shortly after, along came a man who had recently completed some studies at a local university. Feeling himself very enlightened in the ways of truth and very eager to show this enlightenment, he asked the boy about the source of his joy.
"Hey" asked the boy in return with a bright laugh, "Don't you have any idea what God is able to do? I just read that God opened up the waves of the Red Sea and led the whole nation of Israel right through the middle."
The enlightened man laughed lightly, sat down next to the boy and began to try to open his eyes to the "realities" of the miracles of the Bible. "That can all be very easily explained. Modern scholarship has shown that the Red Sea in that area was only 10-inches deep at that time. It was no problem for the Israelites to wade across."
The boy was stumped. His eyes wandered from the man back to the Bible laying open in his lap. The man, content that he had enlightened a poor, naive young person to the finer points of scientific insight, turned to go. Scarcely had he taken two steps when the boy began to rejoice and praise louder than before. The man turned to ask the reason for this resumed jubilation.
"Wow!" exclaimed the boy happily, "God is greater than I thought! Not only did He lead the whole nation of Israel through the Red Sea, He topped it off by drowning the whole Egyptian army in 10 inches of water!"

hmm. just realised that pple have been signing in my guestbook and i didn't know it:D hehee. htmlgear seems to have stopped sending me notices about pple signing my guestbook. ah well:) so odd. shall hafta check it up:D
went shopping today! with lydia, stephie, corinne and ruxuan:) only lydia was on time:( hahaa:) and while we were waiting for others, we helped a japanese guy and commented on the bunch of vj pple gathering nearby, with her telling me about how her church pple are at sentosa and that she's b-o-r-e-d:) oh. and her tale of how to kill corinne;) i didn't do much. i merely tried to teach her the cow song:D
yepz. then corinne came. walked around. went to kfc to eat, walked around somemore. looked at jewellary, clothes. (what else is there to look at?) even went to watson's 'cos we're waiting for steph and rux to arrive:) then lydia decided to not wait for them anyway and we went off to the second level:) corinne saw this shirt in projectBLOODbros that she thought rux will like... think that shop's quite ex. can find perfect substitutes in other places. hahaha:) looked around in warehouse, walked into topmen, then up to topshop, and steph and rux still haven't arrived:D (that is to emphasize how late they were. hahaha. kiddin'!) anyway, surprisingly, steph was earlier than rux:D rux joined us later:)
went to taka levi's later, saw nothing much in there...then we discussed our 'plans' for the day:) decided to go to far east, then back to wisma (i wanted to check out the price of this cross i saw at Le Coral (?) and corinne wanted to buy her tops.), then to taka (steph wanted to buy present for fren), then to heeren (someone needed to do something. can't remember), then to plaza singapura 'cos there're new shops there.
in the end, we couldn't go to plaza sing at all. hahaha:) not enough time:D feet were dying too.
spent quite a lot of time in far east looking at almost every possibly shop with clothing, or accessories, or goodness knows what. got this recommendation from steph:) this shop consists of one-of-a-kind items...and it's really one-of-a-kind 'cos u won't find a second one anywhere. so whatever u buy, it'll be the only one in the whole wide world:D hehehe:) shop is called Mazzario. go find it:) most items are handmade:) yepz:)
anyway, highlight of the day came when lydia and corinne decided to buy the turkish ice cream. super amusing:D anyone who goes to far-east should go and try to find it:D *grInz* chewy icecream!
second highlight came when we saw liling at taka!:D (while eating dinner) hahaha:) and third was neoprints!:D oh dear. i'm shortening everything. really too long:D but had a wonderful and delightful time with them today:D yepz:D

i've got 'chun ni' stuck on my mind now:)all jit's fault. hahaha:)
water bap today was cancelled 'cos of the rain...yup. might as well:) 'cos pple will be more free next time:) so maybe u all can go!:D
had shepherding in the morning at centrepoint macs...felt like it was night instead. hahaha:) 'cos all the shops were still not open and whole place was like ...dark...
had the last word for like class today:) think word for life class was quite interesting:D really built up my foundation and imprinted the truths in me. makes me more aware of all the false doctrines around and why they are false. lots more stuff as well:)
service today was about trusting God in tight spots!:D how applicable. ah wellz:) about finances as well. how apt:D
since water bap was cancelled, me, jits, xinyi and huiling went to Times to read:) actually went with the intention of looking for a baptize name for shuyi...but well. the comics were just too tempting:D read this book called 'the wish list' by Eoin Colfer (okayokay..children's book. but wellz). quite interesting:) kinda reminded me that every action, every word, every unspoken thought that i have will be judged by God in the end:)
going shopping with steph, corinne and lydia tomorrow:) think after tomorrow i won't be going out anymore:) yup:)

ah.
i miss watching hongkong serials:D recalling the times of 'my date with a vampire I and II', 'duo2 qiang1 shi1 jie3' and whatever nonsense with all sorts of pple including but not only chilam(!), hacken lee(!), joyce tang(!), marcus something (!)...hahaha:D and many many many many many more:D they dun seem to show much hongkong serials these days...mostly taiwan shows:) except for the channel u sat 7pm show with hacken lee(!!!):D and ehz. i can't remember the female's name:)
hahaha:)
think i shall go watch 'state of divinity' again. stupid movies:D ah. i forgot anita yuen:) actually, have i ever finished watching 'state of divinity'? hmm.

hmm:) now that i have a lot of time on my hands, i'm looking for more stuff to do:) i want to help where i can!:D
feels so much happier:) at least i'm moving in momentum with time once again:D hahahaa:)
shall wear my hat tomorrow:) i miss my hat:)

lalala!:)
been wondering who this sharon person who smsed me is...then realised that it's the p6 girl from mac fsc:) ah well:)

yah anyway. shall not comment on maths today:P
dear sisters and brothers (if there're any reading this), please pray for me k? pray for the teachers to be SUPER lenient and for me to be able to get promoted:) (hehe. chances of that are very low)
pray that i'll find joy no matter what, and that my source of strength will forever be from Him, so that even if there're bad results shooting me in the face, i'll still be able to stand, for His strength is infinite:)
thank you dear brothers and sisters:)
everybody else, jits and guan-y are both going for water baptism this sunday!:D at around 4 pm at east coast:D if your exams are over, or you really miss us, or you just wanna have an excuse to go to the beach, do join us!:D 'cos this event is quite special to the both of them and they want to share this memorable and joyful occasion with all of you (friends!:D). yup:) if you wanna come (come come!:D), sms me or jits or call guan:)
*grInz*

oh gracious.
rachel has the same birthday as qingz!:D hahaha:)
yep! went for praise and worship night!:D very nice!:)
pastor lawrence was there with his saxophone! hahaha:) added interesting atmosphere to some of the praise and worship songs:)
and there were like...6 pple leading us:) hahaha:)
very nice songs too!:D hahaa:)
we had praise, then worship, then praise again:) 1st praise was good:) but it was the worship that really set my heart in peace and brought out this spirit of joy in me:) had this bubbling cauldron of happiness inside me that was overflowing during second praise:) wonderful! ministered me a lot too:)
and when it ended, we were like 'awwwww' hahaha:) felt like only 30 mins when it had been..ehz. 1 and a half hours+:) heh:)
one day in the house of God is better than 1000 days in the world:) *beamz*

anyway. today's chemistry was horrendous. more horrendous than midyears. felt quite defeated 'cos it seemed like nothing much that i studied actually came out.
ah well. learnt that there are going to be re-papers afterall:) and the teachers are already preparing for them... guess they know that we won't do well. hahhaa:)
but i'll still trust in God's providence and His plan. and maybe through these exams, He's helping me to get rid of my weaknesses and see those blotches i still have in my faith. and i know that even if He doesn't deliver me through the exams, it's part of His plan for me, perhaps to strengthen me, perhaps to correct me.
And that's why when i saw the song 'Heart of Worship', the lyrics just spoke to me a lot. How can i not thank Him for everything He has done for me, the love He has shown me, the aspects in my life He has changed? He let me see how blind i was before, how ignorant i was, how proud i was to think that He didn't exist, how spirtually dead i was to harden my heart against anything anyone spoke to me about, how complacent i was to think that i don't need any God or whatsoever in my life?
some people say that they don't feel God in their lives, they don't see anything happening in their lives even when they pray, that kinda stuff.
But they don't ask themselves, if they haven't even accepted Christ into their lives, if they haven't even bothered to accept Him, if they're spiritually still dead (and not realizing it), how can they hear from Him? God is trying to speak to them, He wants to talk to them, to be a friend, a lover, yet when He speaks, people don't listen.
It's not as if there will be an explosive event whereby people will 'ooooof' all of a sudden hear God's voice talking to them or something. He doesn't force people to accept Him, yet He's greatly saddened everyday when people are still sinning and sinning and unaware that they are sinning. It's a step on our part, an acceptance of a gift from heaven greater than anything else on earth.
Just like a friendship, if i want to be friends with you, yet you don't want to be friends with me, how can i talk to you and help you? And if we've never been friends, then when you ask me to help you with personal things, what can i do?
indeed, the verse matthew 17:12 on joy's blog is quite true too
'What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?'
ask yourself this question today, do you constantly fill empty? feels like loving someone, yet the person you fall in love with doesn't seem to reciprocate your feelings?
Proverbs 19:22 says 'What a man desires is unfailing love; better to be poor than a liar'. indeed, this unfailing love can only be provided by God Himself. Are you deceiving yourself today? Are you being sceptical? Do you deliberately not want to listen?
I used to be like that too. I would like think to myself 'hah. how do i know if you're telling the truth?' then i'll humour those people who share Christ to me and say 'orh okay. orh okay' or i'll be pissed off (pardon me using these words, but yah. to describe how i felt) when my own classmates had praise and worship sessions in class itself.
Or perhaps you're thinking, how do i know that this God is the right God? well, i didn't either. i just decided to try it out. (and to stop people from bothering me *grInz*)...but ever since, He's shown Himself in many circumstances. and listening to the multiple testimonies around, how can you not believe?
Are you afraid of the truth showing Himself to you?:)

daniel bedingfield just said 'i want a girl who really loves God passionately'
haven't really listened to the radio properly for a long time:) hahaha:) he just repeated that statement. ah wellz:)
quite a funny guy:) oh gracious. he just spoke in chinese. ah. and nice voice too:)
interesting 10 minutes with daniel bedingfield:)
was reading through the milestones Hope of God made as well:) quite cool!:D to think the church actually started out with five people. i feel so inspired now:D hahaha:)

channel u news showed scenes of OBS today!:D reminded me of the things we did.. whole watching jumping rope...building a raft...the trust we have to put in each other...the very low morale after not being able to find the tree we're supposed to find and choo reprimanding us (first and only task we didn't complete...) the night trail on hill 31 (all the talk about wild boars and goodness knows what:)...the time when we sat in a semicircle in the dark talking at noordin beach...ahhhh! then when choo told us that we were one of the closest watch she's ever seen (hehe. we got something special for that:) for just five days we were together (different pple from different classes and ccas in school) and at the end of it all, we felt as if we've been best friends all our lives...ah. i forgot to mention..the 11pm milo that choo pao4 for us...
and qingz was in my buddy watch! though i can't really remember what the name is:) haha...just know it's two words...
anyway, sheares rock! OBS rocks. everyone should go and try it:) ah. if u're in residential, you get wonderful food:D they try to fatten everyone up there.
anyway, had chinese paper today:) compo was okay... paper 2 was a bit harder than normal...but okay too (i hope:)
asked mr lim about how to draw the diagram in thermochemistry today...i was like 'ehz...i don't know anything 'cos i haven't really studied thermochem'...and i had to keep apologizing 'cos he'll ask like 'from gaseous atoms to blah blah...what formation is this?' then i'll be like 'eh...i dunno... sorry!' anyway. now i know:) quite fun to draw once u know..hahaha:D
i really want to thank God for sending Mr Lim, Mr Chan, Mr Ho and Miss Lui to be my teachers, for all my brothers and sisters who kept encouraging me, for my hamster, for His constant presence with me even when i sometimes don't realise it, for His gently correction about my heart's attitude towards some stuff, for my dear friends who are around, here and there, popping up at unexpected times to cheer me up:)
i think i've been rather boggled down by exams the past few days...not anymore though:) it's now viewed as something i need to clear and to try not to disappoint any more people. hahaha:)
happened to flip to psalms 145 yesterday night...comforted me alot:)

ah. arenes are awesome:) hahaha:) find benzene and methylbenzene quite fun. ah wellz:) i still dunno how to draw the energy diagram though...maybe i should go and ask mr lim. hmm.

my econs' dead. horrible case study (to me anyway) + i didn't really concentrate on econs. hmmm.
nvm:) shall depend on chem and maths instead. now how to do that is a very good qn...
i do dislike promos. ah wellz. ah wellz. my life was nice and happy and peaceful before stupid promos decided to upset it.
anyway, after the decidedly horrendous econs exam that i've went through (oh yah! forgot to mention that mr chan was very nice. he came to me before the paper, waved his hand in front of my face and asked, how?...then i told him. cannot cannot cannot. then he say, cannot ah? anyway, back to the main point:), the four of us - me, steph, corinne and lydia decided to go and eat:D i mean, we had the intention of eating...but then it continued on to become window shopping:D *grInz* 'cos lydia's looking for shoes. so, we looked around:) steph, corinne and i shared to buy earrings from topshop... ehz...super big. hahaa:) steph got the pink pair, corinne got the blue pair, and i got the multicoloured one:) those kinda hoop earrings. diameter's the length of three of your fingers placed together. oh. forgot to mention. we were at suntec:)
went to citylink too 'cos corinne wanted to change her sim card:) ah. had a nice time today:) kinda forgot that we're in the middle of exams:P
i need to pia for my chem and maths! it's a needdDdd! i neeeeeeddDdd a pass on my chem!!!:P

please go to this website:)

this is what an exam survival kit for me will look like:D
Exam survival kit:
Milo Packet (source of glucose for brain cells)
panadol (headache)
bible (for comfort, guidance and lots lots more)
soft toy which reminds you of happy times (for holding in the hand and feeling better)
water (for nervousness)

first day of exams and i'm dying. hahaha:D gp essay was okay...gp compre was not. didn't do two qns...4 marks gone. no time! thank goodness many people thought it was difficult too...i wrote qn 9 for essay...should criminals be given a second chance in society? hehehe:)
biology completely took the breath out of me. a lot of proteins came out...first half of the year stuff. nearly wanted to tear the paper apart when i saw the qns. so disappointing...i was counting a lot on biology. looks like even the chances of a pass looks faint. hahaha:) nah..
economics tomorrow...not really prepared for it yet...ah well:)

i violently dislike cigarette smokers and ants.
especially ants that bother my clover.

yeah anyway...was watching the simpsons today...at first i was thinking...oh, why're they suddenly talking about prayers and God answers prayers from every christ follower? then as the cartoon goes on, i felt that a tad sarcastic. ah well:) cartoons are cartoons afterall:)
anyway, here's something i noted:
True Courage 2, Ep 3
Thursday, 9 Oct 2003, 9pm

Neivelle Tan - Ironman Turned Pastor

Neivelle Tan was once one of the 10 most wanted men in Singapore.
He began his criminal career by joining the secret society at age 15.
Having spent the most part of his life behind bars, Neivelle was spared the gallows in 1958 because he was under 18 when he committed a murder. Instead, he was detained indefinitely at “Her Majesty’s Pleasure”.
After his release Neivelle failed to make good and turned back to a life of crime. During his time in prison he was known as ‘the iron man’ due to his reputation as the prisoner’s loanshark.
Today, he is a loving father of three and a devoted pastor….
Find out what Neville had to go through to turn over a new leaf and the courage he displayed to get out of the secret society in which he was the leader.

what caught my ears was something he mentioned...he said something about 'it takes real courage to admit that you love jesus'. something like that:)

i'm being more of contemplative or appreciative right now...but since unkymoods.com doesn't seem to have these two moods, the closest i stumble unto is 'thoughtful':)
ah well.
studied with dancing, jayne and jits today at ang mo kio library today. terribly amusing sight this morning just before 10am...when everyone decided to gather outside the library glass panels..first time i've seen anyone so enthusiastic about entering the library:) *grInz* and when the glass panels slid open, one whole group of guys actually ran up to the second level...with another group of girls following not far behind...i merely sauntered in and headed towards cafe galilee, which was surprisingly empty...until i found a seat and everybody else started to swarm in as well. oh well:)
ang mo kio lib has a hologram! or rather...something to do with optical illusion...i was relatively amazed. felt queer when i tried to touch it and it wasn't there though...looks terribly real though:D

hohoho:) pretty much slacked the first half of the day away by procrastinating. watched tv, lay on the bed, slept somemore, watched more tv, looked for food to eat, ate, dilly-dallied once again..
then i felt pretty bad...so i decided to clear up the mess around me:) found quite a lot of 'lost' notes:D *grInz* yepz...was feeling kinda frustrated, with no idea why either...then i decided to call steph to ask her where she's studying...felt much better after that...'cos at least i had a plan as to what to do for the rest of the day:D think that's why i was feeling frustrated...dunno what to do. jits decided to go too:D
so...went there to study, with yun yun and steph:D couldn't find them initially...was walking like an idiot around the tables and chairs and looking puzzled. pple must have thought i'm mad. hahaa:) then steph popped up from nowherE:) ah wellz:)
saw quite a lot of pple...saw a few former ny gals:) saw sihui(!), then dancing and jane joined us too...oh. actually i didn't see a lot of pple..think the stnicks pple saw a lot of pple:) lots of aj pple walking about. ah wellz:) and we sort of 'made' this friend called charlotte...hhaa. 'cos actually she was waving to someone called jesse (is that the right spelling?), then yun thought she was waving to her...so she waved back. hahaha:) anyway, when the library was closing, four strangers she don't know said bye to her:D quite amusing:D and she looked pretty blur about what happened as well:)
going back to the lib tomorrow:D yup.

eh well. looks like i won't be studying at changi airport today afterall:) 'cos the sleepover bunch has decided to go home:) ah wellz:D

eating my dinner now:) *grInzgrInzgrInz*
reached home at around half an hour before...was at the airport half of the day:D
met junting this morning at nyp:) was an...interesting shepherding session:) hehehe:) then went to changi airport bk...saw rux, steph and dancing sitting like...very near joseph and his friend, ken:) super funny:D and they didn't know each other at that time..ah wellz:D
anyway, we had a 8pple caregroup today:D the four of us (huichun, jitsy, ziwei and me) with shanyi, huixian, jean and jason:D *grInz* had games!:D and songs!:D then we split into two groups:D nice caregroup today..hhahaa:) hui xian and jean said that the teaching was quite useful to them:) yeah!
anyway, those three mad pple (:D) are staying overnight at the airport..i wanted to too...but mum won't allow. ah wellz:D jit's endearing dad appeared at the airport and offered to buy us food..how nice:)

good morning everyone!:D i feel so much more relaxed and awake after sleeping for... 7 and a half hours? okay nvm:) woke up to see my hamster in a prowling position with her eyes closed...think she was sleepwalking. hahaha:D so i gently led her back to her bed. ah wellz:)
going to study with steph and rux later at the airport:) like i've said ... the number of times i've been to the airport these past weeks is a few times more than the number of times i've been to the airport in my whole entire life before these few weekz:D *grInz*

ah:) i found my archives...was reading through them when i came to the realisation that i was perhaps more observant, more poetic, more philisophical and more chirpy in the past:) what has education done to me?!
hhahaa:)
well, for one, i no longer ponder about the relationship between the walking pace of different people and the pace of one's progress in life with certain friends, nor do i quote quotes on the blog anymore, nor do i actually discuss about deep provoking questions brought out in an understandable way.
it could also be that the pace of this life no longer bothers me as much, that provoking questions now come with a simple answer, that my security is no longer based on the objects and relationships made in this world, but of somewhere more eternal.
though i must say, i really should aim to cast a more observatory glance into the happenings around me. comment perhaps? a personal touch to a subject which seems relatively impersonal, more general. it is easy to cast a shell of nonchalence towards the things that often happen, preventing all new insights from being made known to us. i figured what i must do, is to clear my assumptions and look in wonder at the things around me once again:) makes you appreciate the people once more:)

:)
had a miscommunication prob with weez this morning...i was waiting for her near the road and she was waiting for me at the carpark:) hahha:) didn't receive her sms...ah wellz:)
surprisingly, there were actually people in school:D didn't want to go to the med talk this morning...saw hanjie and he said there's econs tutorial during the pw period...so, i had my heart set upon going for econs. was walking up the stairs when i saw peilee, huiling and libing heading for the direction of the performance theatre:) well. u see. i figured if the guai-est people are going for the med talk, i might as well tag along:D *grInz*
turns out to be a very good choice:D they got the ceo of dunno wat and the vice dean of nuh? (can't remember) to talk to us...and it wasn't boring at all:D quite personal...and they actually gave the medical field and relatively human side and as they shared about the field itself, it did kinda inspire us in the performance theatre:) talked a lot about the heart...and can really see that they chose this profession fully to serve:) one of the stories shared was actually quite touching:) shall share it here.
anyway, this guy right, he was wondering between sustaining this woman with terminal stage liver cancer with fluids and what-nots and possibly let the woman live for a few more days or just let nature take its course...when he went to see the patient, he actually saw tears in her eyes even when she's semiconscious..comatose...then he went to ask the sister why she's so sad...and the sister said that the woman's son actually quarreled with the woman before he left for england just a few days ago (refused to talk to her after that)...and her other son, who is in sec 4, didn't even bother to visit her in the hospital. so she's quite sad about it...i mean like, imagine, you'll probably die in a few days' time, and your husband had already gone before you, yet your sons refuse to come and visit u..u'll feel abandoned, right?
the doctor, seeing the case, couldn't really take it...so he went to call the son who is in england, said to him 'your mother is dying. you have to fly back and talk to her right away' and he got the sister to call the sec 4 guy. when the sec 4 son came, he asked him to talk to his mum, hold her hand...that kinda stuff:) 'cos the doctor says that even when the person no longer responds, the senses sometimes lasts longer...when the england guy came, the doctor told him the same thing:) the doctor, on his part, will try to keep the patient alive:)
surprisingly, the mother got out of coma after 2 days (most prob 'cos now there's the will to live on) and continued living for another 6 months. should the doctor had given up on her, she would have died on that day or the day after...yet, because the doctor went beyond his call of duty, he allowed the family to be reconciled once more and for the woman to have 6 more months with her sons:)
anyway, the talk emphasized a lot on compassion for others:) was a very nice talk:D glad i didn't miss it afterall:)

Rainbow


?? Which Natural Wonder Or Disaster Are You ??
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got that off xuan an's blog...i think it's one of those biased quizzes whereby most pple will get similar results again:D