Thursday, September 25, 2003

testimony from someone i found on the net:D

I tell everyone "I was raised Catholic, but I gave it up for lent."
It usually gets a laugh, but I'm actually just being honest. Growing up, I couldn't stand the Catholic masses my parents dragged me to. It didn't help that we had a priest who, no matter what the gospel passage was about, invariably spoke on one of his six favorite subjects--in monotone. It didn't seem like worship, certainly.
If you've even been to a Catholic service you know what the missal is: a little book with almost the whole service written in advance! It was like reading the script of a play as you were watching it, complete with stage directions: Sit, Stand, Kneel, Sit!
Looking back, I heard a lot of sermons and I even went through confirmation class; but I don't ever remember hearing the message of salvation through Christ. I heard a lot about Sacraments, confession, and communion, though.If you did all these things and went to Catholic church regularly, you were doing ok, it seemed. I thought that that was all it took to get into Heaven.
When I got to college there was no question about whether I would attend the local Catholic service. No way! I didn't need that!
Then I met 'the Christians'. I was 'deep in study' watching Gilligan's Island in the dorm lounge and one of them actually tried to start a conversation like this: "Gilligan's a great show, isn't it? Have you ever considered a relationship with Jesus Christ?" Hey, maybe the in-your-face approach works for some people; but not me. Their heavy-handed-ness drove me away until I decided to be an atheist.
Believe it or not, that was the turning point. I just couldn't bring myself to believe that all this - the world, nature, human beings - were the result of some cosmic chance or accident or even eons of natural development. So I figured there was at least a 'God the Creator.'
Then I met Joe. Joe was a Christian. But Joe was fun! It didn't fit; it was something I'd never imagined: Christians can be real people too!
After talking to Joe (and this is over several months, mind you) I joined a weekly Bible study group with Intervarsity Christian Fellowship. I had one of those little green Gideon New Testaments someone had passed out to me on the Quad. The study went like this: we would all read a short passage together, then the leader would ask us questions.
Everyone sat around, deep in thought, trying to come up with the 'right' answer, but to me it looked obvious--the answer to the question was usually right there in the text, so I ended up speaking quite a bit while the others were still thinking. Maybe my answers weren't very deep, but I was participating. And some of it was making sense.
I kept this up for almost a year, sometimes sneaking away from my friends to go to the study group. I didn't even want to be seen in the hallway carrying a Bible.
During this time I met Michele. We dated for about two and a half weeks and she suddenly broke up with me. I won't tell you the reason she gave; it wasn't the real one anyway. (She had become a Christian and her Christian friends had warned her against having a non-Christian boyfriend. I didn't find this out till years later.)
We continued to be friends. I was still madly in love, but she resisted all of my considerable effort and charm ;-)
Eventually I found out she was a Christian (not when she became one, just that she was now). We were still friends, and I even went to church with her on Sundays (Twin City Bible Church in Urbana, a little non-denominational chapel near the dorms). We even went to one service where the sermon was on Christian/Non-Christian relationships. I asked her what she thought, and she told me that she wouldn't date me unless I was a Christian. But even that wasn't enough to make me take the plunge.
I continued with my study, still not ready to commit. One evening, November 22, 1991, Michele and I were walking back from a movie, and we got to talking. The conversation was still going when we got to her dorm, so we just started walking around the block. We talked about what I thought about Christianity and all that; and then she asked me this question: "What is it that is keeping you from becoming a Christian?"
I forget what I answered. It was something evasive, no doubt. it certainly wasn't the truth, because at the time I didn't even know what the truth was. But I couldn't forget the question. Late that night I finally admitted to myself that I was the only thing keeping me from becoming a Christian.
Laying there in my bunk that night, with the lights off, I prayed a little prayer. I confessed I was a sinner and asked Jesus to come into my life. And this sounds strange but I swear it's true: I felt as if warm water were being poured into me from above, starting at my chest and filling my whole body. It's a feeling I'll never forget, but Christianity is about more than a 'warm feeling'.
The next day I called Michele and told her the good news. To my great surprise, she was angry with me! I hadn't realized that news of that magnitude should be delivered in person, not over the phone!
For some reason I didn't bother to tell anyone else. I still don't know why.. I just talked to people as if nothing had changed.
But the following Sunday at church, it was a Thanksgiving service. At the end, they brought out a microphone on a long cord and took it around the audience, asking people what they were thankful for. Eventually, I stood up and said that "I just became a Christian a few days ago, and I'm thankful for that." I wasn't prepared for what happened next. First, the congregation applauded. That was a complete surprise. Then, after the service, Joe and the people from my study all came up to me "Why didn't you tell me?" "Great News!" "That's Wonderful!".
But I'll never forget what Joe said: "I've been praying for you for a long time, buddy." I never knew! All this time he'd been praying on my behalf, asking God to bring me closer to Him, and I never suspected!
Well, that's not the end of my story, but it's a good place to stop for now. (Except to note that Michele and I were later married in that same church!)
Being a Christian isn't just something you decide to do. It's a process that starts with a decision, and continues the rest of your life. I'm still learning and growing in this new life.

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