we just had a 2 hour maths session with mr ho. quite funny. mr ho's in a good mood. he went 'e^2, e^2' to us and then went 'quickly. i'm so bored i'm rocking to entertain myself' quite funny.
was doing complex numbers. disastrous. hahaha:D
yeah well. stayed over at my aunt's house yesterday. quite a nice room to study in and sleep. more sleeping than studying i guess. hahaha. very nice scenery 'cos she lives on the 20th floor. feels like u're in the city, yet out of the city. and cool to know that if u're hungry, the whole toa payoh central is just a walk away. there were 4 dwarf hamsters at her house. hahaha. but all of them looked a little scruffy. and they all ran away when i put my hand near the cage. how friendly:)
second day of eating outside food. this is becoming quite an adventure...searching for new foods to eat everyday, and trying to balance your meals. hahahha:)

Which Pepsi-Cola or Coca-Cola soda are you most like?
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how disgusting. i dun like coke. and steph is still printing out stuff. and i'm falling asleep:) hehehehe:D

You're the color blue. You have the three c's in
life--you're cool, caring and confident.
Trustworthy and honest, people are naturally
attracted to you. You're unusually optimistic,
but that makes life all the better. You're an
imaginative person who loves sleeping and
dreaming. Hard-working and determined, you
excel in school. You're everybody's favorite,
and this is because you have this undefined
richness in your personality and attitude.
Mild-tempered and stable. Not to mention very
intelligent. Along with the fact that you're
conservative, you're worried about the
environment. So basically, you're a generous,
dependable and devoted--just the kind of person
everybody needs. Wouldn't it be great if
everybody in the world were like you?


What color are you? (Amazingly detailed & accurate--with pics!)
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hahaha! look at the line hardworking and determined! i'm determined. but i'm not so sure about hardworking;)

hmm. in school typing this out now. 'cos my whole entire room is under plastic sheets as well. hahahaha:D will be staying over at my aunt's house tonight...saw worship cds in my 2nd cousin's room:) shall steal her books to read! muahahha. oh. and she has like almost all of the channels on scv. what a temptation! hahaha. and it's in her room! where i'll be studying. oh gosh.
nahhhh. can't tempt me:P mind's in too much of a structure to watch tv continuously. my only show today is zai shen yuan. and my only show tmr night is STILL zai shen yuan. on wed night, the tv is but a black box which reflects its surroundings on its face:)

sure feels weird walking around with shoes in your own house. shall treat it as though i'm living in the hostel. how thrilling.
can't sleep:D hahaha. shall do qt:D too much sunshine today. delays my inner clock by a few hours. i dunno if that's good or bad:D hahahaha:D good i guess. more time to do more things:)
-so we cry
holy, worthy, glory, majesty,
You reign on high,
high above all the earth
You are my God
my Lord and King-

my house is in a mess. total horrendous mess which makes me feel a tad miserable. like my whole entire house is reduced to three rooms. confined space. restricted movement. having a house which doesn't feel entirely yours anymore. my poor house. and plastic sheets are all over the place. perfect setting for an old abandoned flat in a horror movie.
-there's a calf with mournful eye-
okay. 60 seconds over. hahaha:D
studied with joycelyn and her friends te se and te qin (twin sisters!) today. quite..eh. strange. 'cos dunno te se and te qin personally. but quite okay...hahaha:D lakerol --- makes people talk ;)
then both of them left...so i'm stuck with joycelyn. saw the very bored librarian who keeps walking around the library like 500-600 times throughout the day everytime we go to marine parade library to study:) think he's just bored:) seems to be quite nice with the kids. oh!!! saw a very adorable little girl today who has an eurasian look and a chinese mother. think she's got mixed blood in her:D her eyes are.. BIG AND DEEP AND SOULFUL. very enchanting lil girl.
then we moved to bk. hahaha. it was apparently the 'peak period' for toilet-going..'cos the toilets are mostly full. i found it quite amusing.
learnt how to make the star using the straws today. my second attempt at making a star without instructions was...well. hmmm. hard to handle. hahahaha:D

sometimes talking to my sister is like incurring a volcano's fury.
hmmm. was just trying to look for my physical geog book to find out what kinda volcano gives the loudest explosion when i decided to flip through mckean from sec 4 for fun and realised that mckean actually HAS jc stuff. which is kinda amusing 'cos we seemed to have learnt some stuff before but i simply can't remember:)
at this moment, i'm supposed to be on 31 on my way to marine parade lib to study..instead, i'm still happily stuck at home printing out the bio stuff needed to be done by tomorrow:) brilliant:)
anyway, i had quite a nice morning, except for the fact that the volcano erupted in my house and i got slightly burnt:P walked to the market and said hi to my parents, had a nice quiet breakfast at my own pace (gosh. haven't had tt in quite a while:D), walked around the market 'cos they just renovated the whole place, bought some stuff, can't find slippers and then walked home again. nice weather we have today:) i wish i can cycle...if i can, i'll prob be out cycling right now. wonderful weather to swim too. 'cept that the swimming pool will prob be relatively fuller than during the weekdays. which makes swimming not as enjoyable.
off to study i go!

Who Are You in the 10K Commotion? (10 Questions to Find Your Inner 10K Star)
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hehe. was on 238 with Christine from north just now.. we never saw each other in our whole entire lives before coming to Hope and we've never realised how close we live within the radius of each other till today. she lives at block 224, i live at block 228:D
hahaha. so farnie:)
had service today:D haven't seen shirley leading p&w for quite some time...haha. they put up a very nice little clip with verses incorporated into it:) quite adorable, but it got its point across:)
so fast. gosh. we're coming to the end of the Acts power for living series...so fast. hahaha. last chapter next week:) so cool. one year plus...gosh. and yeah! we're gonna be doing 'song of songs' soon:D hahaha:D the first ever book that caught my attention:)
heh. studying at starhub after service wasn't particularly effective. was quite sleepy. hehehe. tried rj bio mcq paper. horrendous. got strange terms popping up tt i didn't realise. oh gosh. can u imagine? i've also gotta do nyj's killer paper. hahaha:D
i love the night air. so cooling. smell the night air as it wafts in the window. i love the morning air too...that's why it's always so refreshing to take a nice morning walk. hahaha. and i love the sharpness of the night. clearly defined.

:)
had shepherding in the morn:) heh. quite farnie.
then went to sch and wrote an econs essay!:D quite fun to write an econs essay with the real test of time at your feet. guess having to go to school in the day is turning out to be quite good..'cos you're forced to practice during the day and this increases productivity:D hahha:D
yeah! my voice is officially back:) or have i mentioned it before? hahaa:)
i am in a studying mood. hahaha:) oh guess what?! the school library has narnia! hahaha:)
borrowed the forth and fifth book from the library. yeah:) can read during my breaks:) rest my brain:) my brain likes to auto switch itself off these days when thinking is not really necessarily. then what happens is that i go a bit nutty. hahaha:)

gee. the world is really small:)
i went to fungi's blog, then saw jo's name..then i was like. jo has a blog? then i clicked on it. and realised tt it's the wrong jo. hahaha:D then i saw panghao's name on the blog. like 'huh? how come the whole world knows my pri sch classmate? hahaha!' then from panghao's blog, i saw arya. and arya is trace's other and of course trace is my twinklebells! hahaa.
yeah well.
-now here we go again you say
you want your freedom
well who am i to keep you down
it's only right that you should play the way you feel it
and listen carefully to the sound
to the loneliness of your heartbeat
drives you mad
in the stillness of remembering what you had
and what you lost-
i'm in a song mood! caught three pple's performance on singapore idol... christopher's song was good...but his singing was terrible. say so many times already. he doesn't have the voice to carry the song through. and olinda came on and gosh! i love her performance. hahaha:D superb vocals and the song she chose makes you wanna grooooove. then sylvester. haha. his singing surprised me actually. ok. maybe i shld change my opinion of him. today's rendition was quite good too:)
yeahhhhhh.

mentally tiring day...but quite fun nevertheless. or rather, quite funny when you see a whole row of your classmates sitting behind you. hahaha:D my class is so ke lian!
i'm pleased with myself with trigo. hahaha:D very pleased:D hahaha:D okay. i sound funny being pleased with myself without saying anything. but hahaha. what can i say? i'm just pleased with trigo:D hahaha. gosh. i sound a lil mad. think the cg pple must have been wondering why i kept laughing during cg. ah well:D
and i still insist that zai shen yuan is a good show to watch:) the intricate plot...the easy to understand analogies...the link of relationships and how things link well in a complexed web:)
cat was sleeping in my house. poor cat. nowhere to sleep now that construction is everywhere. speaking of construction...i can't come home next week! hahaha. my house'll be under renovations. major renovations:P gosh. feels so odd. will be in my auntie's house most of the time. (can't go home before 6pm everyday) hahaha:D hope i dun get distracted and keep watching scv at her house. cartoons and armed reaction 4!
nah. dun think so. hahaha. this is a plea for pple to study with me next week. hahaha:D
-God is good, all the time
He puts a song of praise in this heart of mine
God is good, all the time
in the darkest nights, His light will shine
God is good, He's so good,
all the time-
i had a headache today. hahaha. then i prayed:D and the headache poofed and disappeared within a min:D enjoyed the fellowship of the brothers and sister without a headache after that:D hahaha:D thank God!

i can't wait for tmr! hahaa. first of all, there's the activity that mr leeba has promised us in place of morning assembly tmr morning. *grInz* he kept saying that we'll be VERY STRESSED for around 20 mins, but at the end of it all, we'll feel good about ourselves:) like. ehhh...what can it be? anyway, seems like only my class pple are interested enough to raise their hands and want to go, my class will prob be the only class going.
yeah:D and mrs teo bought us cornetto ice cream! hahaha. she's funny. she was like asking how much time she has left, the someone told her 2 mins...and then she said 'can i use the 2 mins to digress?' then the bell rang. hahaha. ah well. then she looked like this child who's very satisfied with herself giving a surprise to everyone (very funny!:D haahaha! mrs teo cracks me up:D) and she said she got ice cream for us. and she said since she gave it to us, we owe her something. haha. and dominique guessed about the A. 'cos the ice cream cone is V-shaped...so it's like we must have victory in the exams! and an inverted A...so it's like we all owe her an A.
hahaha:D yeah! ice cream tmr!
gosh. i was quite surprised at my bio results. thought i was dead for certain 'cos of structured and prac. hahha:D oh my! MCQ really pulled me up. for bio, it's not easy to fail. but it's not easy to get an A either.
anyway, maths was funny too. hahaha. it's like we had a crash course on complex numbers 'cos it seems that most pple didn't study complex numbers. hahaha. the end of the lesson saw many pple going out of class to ask mr ho for a session for complex numbers. hahaha.
finally returned mrs wee the money! hahaha. hard to catch her. she's the hod of pccg...and she helped me pay first. hehee.
yeah:) my programme for the next 3 weeks is super packed. the teachers planned out my studying schedule for me. hahhaa.

hehehe. just talked to sister's friend called yahui. hahaha:D she's a year older than me and was in nyj taking arts... she knows bowen and rara and sining! hahaha:D rara and sining were my basketball seniors...and she knows carrie too! hahaha. through bowen. hmmm. apparently 'cos they were together... hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. i didn't know that. haha.
ah well. anyway, she's in nus taking social work now:D hehee. so huichun! if u see a girl called ya3 hui4, can talk to her:D hahaha:D
anyway, studied with joycelyn today. hehe. cancelled it at first, but then..ah well. haha. did trigo for the whole day! gosh. trigo became fun:D hahaa. the back part of the specimen paper wasn't very morale boosting:P i looked at it, i was like:P and stats needs practice..once i haven't touched it much, i forget about it. so sad! and i love stats so much! hahaha:D
yeah well. when i was going home, we saw the bus stop area being cordoned off and 2 trucks of policemen being unloaded and four police cars along the road side and lots of people staring at what's happening. it's quite a scary sight. actually we also dunno wat happened...but heard from someone tt there's a riot. a riot?O_o in singapore? gosh. ehhh. well.
hahha. i reached home safely anyway. hope whatever was happening ceased off. we're all singaporeans what, why fight amongst outselves?:)

oooh. i sound disgruntled in my last post:D a disgruntled janitor in the mob factory has a red aura and usually LACERATES. hahahha. think only a few pple will know what i'm talking abt. or maybe just jits. hahaha.
sec 4 maths is making me vomit out blood. hahahaha:D and the specimen paper boosts up ur morale. and i feel hungry at such an hour. disastrous. and i feel awake. and God is my Jehovah Jireh! hahaha. He provides! gosh. was severely lacking in financial resources and was praying for God to help me. hahaha. 'cos i need to pay for this workshop thing by monday to mrs wee (gosh. it's mrs wee and not mrs lee...been looking for the wrong person) and it's $50+++ (can't remember the exact amount..think it's more like $65) and i'm like dying 'cos i have a total of -ve goodness-knows-how-much for normal expenses ('cos i owed jits money for the cds first). and i kept reminding myself 'what i dun have, i dun need' hahaha. and -God is good, all the time-, my mum gave me money! haha. and pple returned the money they owed me. i still have to cover the rest myself but i've still got enough to *yumyum*.
thank God! i tell u ah. really amazing. hahaha.
i wish i'll stop the haha-ing and the hehe-ing...they've become punctuations in my sentences. ah well.

gee. my sister just passed me 'lime' and even lime agrees with me that JEASSEA SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN IN. and BEVERLY GOT A GOOD VOICE. this is what they say about jeassea:
'if there were ever a poster girl for Singapore Idol, it'd be Jeassea. Armed with the right looks, a strong voice and oodles of charisma, she definitely raises the bar in this competition. Judging from her polished rendition of Aretha Franklin's notoriously difficult 'Chain of Fools', she's also one of the few contestants who's able to nail the more uptempo numbers without missing a beat...'
and about beverly:
'Correct me if i'm wrong but this IS a singing competition, right? How then do you explain a wonderful singer like Beverly getting the boot?...'
and this is what they say about jerry;)
'This accountant-turned-busker-turned-dubious Top 12 Finalist caused a MAJOR UPROAR when he wheedled his way past powerhouses like Nana and Beverly in the last piano show. What's worse, his lacklustre and totally unspectacular version of 'To Love Somebody' was nowhere near the quality of the two ousted divas.'
ah well. i just think it's kinda unfair that good singers like Jeassea and Beverly got out in the first round of the finals. Singapore can't recognise talents when they see them:P
oh. and this is stupid. urban exchange is changing their name to Parking Lot Pimp. with darren hayes' new disastrous song 'Popular' and urban exchange changing to such a stupid name, i wonder how the music scene is going to survive in the future. the second law of thermodynamics is very much in motion here.
oh bother. and lime is getting more and more thrashy. can't stand these stupid magazines. yuck:P

"Even now my witness is in heaven. My advocate is there on high. My friends scorn me, but I pour out my tears to God" (Job 16:19-20, nlt).

A Daily Encounter reader who has been hurt deeply asks, "Do you have any insight into dealing with the strong emotions that arise from being deeply hurt and wounded?

Dear Fred (not his real name), one way you can help "drain the pain" of hurt feelings is to write out your feelings. David did this in several of his Psalms. I think he was a man after God's own heart because of his being open and honest with himself and with God. When you write, write as if you are writing a letter to the one who hurt you. Express all your feelings in all their intensity to this person. Then read the letter to God telling him that this is exactly the way you feel (he knows it anyhow);then tear up the letter and destroy it. Write again and again
doing the same thing until all your hurt and angry feelings are dissipated. But never, never, never send one of these letters to anybody. At a later time, should you feel a need to write or contact the person in question, remember always to write and speak the truth in love;never in anger.
God also gave us tears to help drain the pain of hurt feelings. So give yourself permission to weep with all your heart for until we have learned to weep with all our heart, we are not free to love with all our heart either. Tears, however, are for expressing grief ... not anger. Anger needs to be expressed in writing, verbalized, or both.

Also, everyone needs at least one person he/she can trust implicitly with whom to share his/her feelings. It needs to be an understanding and caring person who listens and accepts us with all our hurt and angry feelings but won't give us advice, preach at us, or tell us what we should or shouldn't do or feel. And, if necessary, have several sessions with a qualified Christian counselor to help you
work through and resolve your feelings.

And of course be sure to tell God exactly how you feel and to lead you to the help you need to resolve your hurt and angry feelings so you can get to a point of genuine
forgiveness. Failing to forgive will only hurt you. It's "like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die."

heh. the cat's at my door sleeping.
dunno wat to do with her. ah well.
i got a mini shock when i went down to the english resource room for gp...hahha. saw like 2/3 of the whole class sitting outside the resource with mr lee talking about cohabitation. then i did something stupid, went up to mr lee and said 'oh! i didn't realise that gp starts early today.':P
then i saw serene and thongkheng on the other side of the space outside the english resource room. hahaha:D then i went to join them. realised tt the 2/3 of my dear adorable class is having 'friends of mr lee' class. hehe. then me and serene and thongkheng, michelle and hui xiang were like at the other side waiting for gp lessons to officially start. mr lee mentioned tt 2/7 couples get divorced... then huixiang went 'if so many pple get divorced, why get married in the first place?' and i was thinking about my cousin and j. hmm.
gp... sat beside pat and mich and was writing in serene's book..hahaha:D she did a very nice autograph book thing, pasted the photos in the book and divided it in sections. like a mini collage of all her memories in vj, together with photos and notes from her friends.
watched the results of singapore idol just now. hmmm. i dun think i agree with what has happened. jeassea and beverly both should have gotten in! gosh. what a waste. i like maia's style of singing 'lady marmalade'..didn't catch yesterday's performance but heard the highlights and all... and it was quite good. olinda got a nice voice for her song as well:) okay. i'm biased. i still think sylvester can't sing. so sad that candice drew out! my sister says there're rumours that she's pregnant. pregnant? how odd.
-and some people want it all,
but i don't want none of it all,
if it ain't you baby,
if i ain't got you baby-
hahaa. zai shen yuan is starting to pick up on channel u:D they showed the sleeping on the arm scene. more to come soon!
off to do my work. ladeeeda.

watching 'pooh's grand adventure'...very sweet! very nice:D hahaha.

i found this beside my bag after my trip to the toilet. hahaha. since no one was left around me and the nearest person in the canteen was... 3 tables away, i decided to take it with me and give due recognition to what is written instead of letting it float around for a long time yet, vulnerable to the weathering that occurs so rapidly in singapore.
it is supposed to be for 04S22...which is quite interesting since all the j1s dun seem to be in school today. anyway, it says to 04S22 (goodness knows how they're going to find it.)
'Dear 04S22, as you grow up, may you not lose that child in you. Live young and die young. Happy Children's Day and all the best for your promos!:)
chanks 1 Oct 2004'
hmm. who's chanks? anyway. i read through what was on the paper and it sounded true so i've decided to type it down:D
here goes:
'Youth is not a time of life; it is a state of mind; it is not a matter of rosy cheeks, red lips and supple knees; it is a matter of the will, a quality of the imagination, a vigor of the emotions; it is the freshness of the deep springs of life.
Youth means a temperamental predominance of courage over timidity of the appetite, for adventure over the love of ease. This often exists in a man of sixty more than a boy of twenty. Nobody grows old merely by a number of years. We grow old by deserting our ideals.
Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul. Worry, fear,self-distrust bows the heart and turns the spirit back to dust.
Whether sixty of sixteen, there is in every human being's heart the lure of wonder, the unfailing child-like appetite of what's next, and the joy of the game of living. In the center of your heart and my heart there is a wireless station; so long as it receives messages of beauty, hope, cheer, courage and power from men and from the infinite, so long are you young.
When the aerials are down, and your spirit is covered with snows of cynicism and the ice of pessimism, then you are grown old, even at twenty, but as long as your aerials are up, to catch the waves of optimism, there is hope you may die young at eighty.'
i dunno where everyone is. steph and lydia are not around. zara is nowhere to be seen. i have a sneaking suspicion that everyone else is either scattered around (of which they can't be found. strange), studying away, not in school yet or they've all gone to join the 'friends of mr lee' club due to their gp prelim results. hmmm. and here i am, spending my time typing this out. let me join shasta in the world of Narnia then.