At ang mo kio macs typing this out. Waiting for bobo and venven to come. haha.
just came out from bo's house.
the uni main com and sub com pple were discussing together yesterday night, all in preparation for uni camp .. which is..
TOMORROW!
quite encouraged by the spirit of the people:) have been quite tired in the past few days due to taking of chi/sleeping late (can't remember because of what)/ preparing stuff ard.. this whole week feels more tiring than last exam week 'cos
1) not enough sleep continuously
2) haven't had chance to recover from the brunt of exams
3) no time to properly plan out things to do. plans have to be changed accordingly. plans have become VERY flexible. hahaha.
but quite enjoyable i suppose. though the fatigue is probably getting to lots of people.
encouraged by michelle. who stayed overnight at bo's house with us to tie down things with the programming pple. and she still has work today :) and in view of the fact that we still have 3 and a half days of camp ahead.. woohoo.
encouraged by sze hua, who was so meticulous and detailed in handling logistical stuff that it amazes me. hahaa. thank God for her charm XD
encouraged by weiling (who's probably reading this..), who continually ponders about how to improve on the games, wishing to make it more excellent :) jiayou wor!
encouraged by joyce lim. hahaa. served with her last year for alpha.. think i really enjoy serving with her.. 'cos her spirit is very sweet:) and very uplifting. and she's willing to learn:)
encouraged by bo. who willingly opened up his house for 5 sisters. hahahaa. and hosted us even as he's very tired. thank God for his continual silent 'do-it' spirit for God:)
hehe. encouraged by ven and lishan as well! but will type that another day. especially for venven :)
i think a verse that keeps coming back to me is that of
"Unless the Lord builds the house
the labourers labour in vain."
which is really true. think we labour because we really hope that the uni camp can touch the hearts of all the people who're going.. all 180 of us.
and unless people go, the efforts will all go to waste.
if people are willing,
God can move in a mightier way than you can imagine.
Monday, May 12, 2008
I guess taking of a cat is not as easy as it seems. lol.
It's time consuming, financial consuming and energy consuming.
hehe.
anyway chi's definitely growing bigger! though not as big as how I'd like him to be. he's still small enough to be carried in two palms. I think it's a him anyway:)
and he's very worrisome! think he drinks milk the wrong way.. so everytime will burp/fart out a lot of air. it's very scary. sometimes he'll hiccup.. and it makes you wonder what's wrong. 'cos his eyes will go very big and become very watery, and he's just keep expelling a lot of air. and there's nothing you can do but stroke its back/pat its back, in the hope that it helps to get the air out sooner.
but he's getting stronger:) he can now climb out of the carrier on his own. woohoo. and much faster too.
a bit quieter today.. after the traumatic event of falling off my bed. and the traumatic event of being forced to drink from a shallow dish. it got very quiet after that:l and got quite reluctant to suckle. he's since recovered (i hope).
i don't have the time to take care of it. lol. especially with uni camp coming up and all. don't know what to do then.
and the milk powder is diminishing soon!:) he now drinks the whole portion at one feeding (the big spoonful of powder).
and he doesn't like his carrier anymore.. so now he wanders ard my bed most of the time.
okay. i know some people find it unhygenic. i don't really care at this moment anyway. he's so small! and i'm not allergic to him! fell asleep a few times while stroking it to sleep.
let's pray that it survives. very scary to keep hearing burping voices from him:S
It's time consuming, financial consuming and energy consuming.
hehe.
anyway chi's definitely growing bigger! though not as big as how I'd like him to be. he's still small enough to be carried in two palms. I think it's a him anyway:)
and he's very worrisome! think he drinks milk the wrong way.. so everytime will burp/fart out a lot of air. it's very scary. sometimes he'll hiccup.. and it makes you wonder what's wrong. 'cos his eyes will go very big and become very watery, and he's just keep expelling a lot of air. and there's nothing you can do but stroke its back/pat its back, in the hope that it helps to get the air out sooner.
but he's getting stronger:) he can now climb out of the carrier on his own. woohoo. and much faster too.
a bit quieter today.. after the traumatic event of falling off my bed. and the traumatic event of being forced to drink from a shallow dish. it got very quiet after that:l and got quite reluctant to suckle. he's since recovered (i hope).
i don't have the time to take care of it. lol. especially with uni camp coming up and all. don't know what to do then.
and the milk powder is diminishing soon!:) he now drinks the whole portion at one feeding (the big spoonful of powder).
and he doesn't like his carrier anymore.. so now he wanders ard my bed most of the time.
okay. i know some people find it unhygenic. i don't really care at this moment anyway. he's so small! and i'm not allergic to him! fell asleep a few times while stroking it to sleep.
let's pray that it survives. very scary to keep hearing burping voices from him:S
Friday, May 09, 2008
"The truly creative mind in any field is no more than this:
A human creature born abnormally, inhumanly sensitive.
To him...
a touch is a blow,
a sound is a noise,
a misfortune is a tragedy,
a joy is an ecstasy,
a friend is a lover,
a lover is a god,
and failure is death.
Add to this cruelly delicate organism the overpowering necessity to create, create, create - - - so that without the creating of music or poetry or books or buildings or something of meaning, his very breath is cut off from him. He must create, must pour out creation. By some strange, unknown, inward urgency he is not really alive unless he is creating."
-Pearl Buck-
------------------------
ah.
i was wondering if i have attention deficit disorder... lol.. since i get bored easily and get distracted easily. so i went to read up more on the disorder and realised that i don't have it. lol.
sadness.
hhaha.
so i went to search on the category that i'm supposed to be in..
# They are flexible thinkers, able to use many different alternatives and approaches to problem solving.
# They are original thinkers, seeking new, unusual, or unconventional associations and combinations among items of information.
# They can also see relationships among seemingly unrelated objects, ideas, or facts.
# They are elaborate thinkers, producing new steps, ideas, responses, or other embellishments to a basic idea, situation, or problems.
# They are willing to entertain complexity and seem to thrive on problem solving.
# They are good guessers and can readily construct hypotheses or "what if" questions.
# They often are aware of their own impulsiveness and irrationality, and they show emotional sensitivity.
# They are extremely curious about objects, ideas, situations, or events.
# They often display intellectual playfulness and like to fantasize and imagine.
# They can be less intellectually inhibited than their peers are in expressing opinions and ideas, and they often disagree spiritedly with others' statements.
# They are sensitive to beauty and are attracted to aesthetic values.
---> seems to explain for why i behave in certain ways.
alright!
just received an sms to write a script. a bright sunshine spot in the midst of three weeks of stormy weather.
something within me is enjoying the task of writing the script even before i start.. lol
A human creature born abnormally, inhumanly sensitive.
To him...
a touch is a blow,
a sound is a noise,
a misfortune is a tragedy,
a joy is an ecstasy,
a friend is a lover,
a lover is a god,
and failure is death.
Add to this cruelly delicate organism the overpowering necessity to create, create, create - - - so that without the creating of music or poetry or books or buildings or something of meaning, his very breath is cut off from him. He must create, must pour out creation. By some strange, unknown, inward urgency he is not really alive unless he is creating."
-Pearl Buck-
------------------------
ah.
i was wondering if i have attention deficit disorder... lol.. since i get bored easily and get distracted easily. so i went to read up more on the disorder and realised that i don't have it. lol.
sadness.
hhaha.
so i went to search on the category that i'm supposed to be in..
# They are flexible thinkers, able to use many different alternatives and approaches to problem solving.
# They are original thinkers, seeking new, unusual, or unconventional associations and combinations among items of information.
# They can also see relationships among seemingly unrelated objects, ideas, or facts.
# They are elaborate thinkers, producing new steps, ideas, responses, or other embellishments to a basic idea, situation, or problems.
# They are willing to entertain complexity and seem to thrive on problem solving.
# They are good guessers and can readily construct hypotheses or "what if" questions.
# They often are aware of their own impulsiveness and irrationality, and they show emotional sensitivity.
# They are extremely curious about objects, ideas, situations, or events.
# They often display intellectual playfulness and like to fantasize and imagine.
# They can be less intellectually inhibited than their peers are in expressing opinions and ideas, and they often disagree spiritedly with others' statements.
# They are sensitive to beauty and are attracted to aesthetic values.
---> seems to explain for why i behave in certain ways.
alright!
just received an sms to write a script. a bright sunshine spot in the midst of three weeks of stormy weather.
something within me is enjoying the task of writing the script even before i start.. lol
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Studying for pediatric psych exams now..
Realised that maybe having the exam questions presented to you doesn't make it easier to study. it kinda increases the stress on you to memorize the answer, have the best answer and all.
i mean, if the questions are not given to us, at least i can just study the notes, memorize my main points and smoke on that day (hopefully with substance..). but now i'm memorizing.
but i guess it does help us remember the points.
memorized questions 3 and 2.
i still have 1,4,5,6,7!
it's like, u sorta know the material, but you don't go and memorize it. lol.
maybe i'll sleep at 5am again. lol
Realised that maybe having the exam questions presented to you doesn't make it easier to study. it kinda increases the stress on you to memorize the answer, have the best answer and all.
i mean, if the questions are not given to us, at least i can just study the notes, memorize my main points and smoke on that day (hopefully with substance..). but now i'm memorizing.
but i guess it does help us remember the points.
memorized questions 3 and 2.
i still have 1,4,5,6,7!
it's like, u sorta know the material, but you don't go and memorize it. lol.
maybe i'll sleep at 5am again. lol
In one toilet trip, i realised that maybe i need to appreciate the people around me more:) 'cos in appreciating them, i can love them more. and love can cover over a multitude of sins.
in one night, i realised that i don't like to be left out of things:) actually i realised it before, but it's concretized. lol. good that i got to know more about myself:)
and though it's 1.51am, i'm wide awake.
must be the 1 and a half hour nap, accompanied by the tea i drank this morning. lol.
in one night, i realised that i don't like to be left out of things:) actually i realised it before, but it's concretized. lol. good that i got to know more about myself:)
and though it's 1.51am, i'm wide awake.
must be the 1 and a half hour nap, accompanied by the tea i drank this morning. lol.
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
heh.
i really enjoyed my japanese paper:)
it's as delicious as eating unagi sushi. hahaa. it's the same feeling as when i'm watching a good anime and unexpected things unfold. i don't know why i enjoyed it, but i did:)
hehe.
it's probably not my best paper, but writing it was fun. hahaa.
and i was looking at my senseis during the paper and thinking about how i'm going to miss them. or rather, how i'm already missing them:)
so interesting ah.
i always miss the lecturers whom i like. haha. when i don't get to go to their lessons anymore. i miss Dr Tan, i miss Dr Tang. I miss my forensic lecturer Stella Tan. and i'm going to miss Dr Tay this sem, alongside with my japanese senseis. I really enjoyed Japanese. hahaa. every lecture made me laugh. and tutorials were fun too:)
I enjoyed my cognitive psych paper too. haha. though i kinda forgot what conjunctive and disjunctive search was.. heh. and my integration question was not the best.. but i enjoyed writing section b very much, as well as some questions in section A (e.g. question 3). haha.
okay. i better get back to studying for pediatric psych. lol.
i really enjoyed my japanese paper:)
it's as delicious as eating unagi sushi. hahaa. it's the same feeling as when i'm watching a good anime and unexpected things unfold. i don't know why i enjoyed it, but i did:)
hehe.
it's probably not my best paper, but writing it was fun. hahaa.
and i was looking at my senseis during the paper and thinking about how i'm going to miss them. or rather, how i'm already missing them:)
so interesting ah.
i always miss the lecturers whom i like. haha. when i don't get to go to their lessons anymore. i miss Dr Tan, i miss Dr Tang. I miss my forensic lecturer Stella Tan. and i'm going to miss Dr Tay this sem, alongside with my japanese senseis. I really enjoyed Japanese. hahaa. every lecture made me laugh. and tutorials were fun too:)
I enjoyed my cognitive psych paper too. haha. though i kinda forgot what conjunctive and disjunctive search was.. heh. and my integration question was not the best.. but i enjoyed writing section b very much, as well as some questions in section A (e.g. question 3). haha.
okay. i better get back to studying for pediatric psych. lol.
heh.
by the way,
just want to say a thanks for all the times you've beared with me during this exam period.
for those who beared with me when i was
tired.
down.
angry.
lethargic.
irritated.
thanks for your unconditional love:)
thanks for the many encouragement cards, many massages, hugs, encouragement, help, errands ran, food supplied and company.
by the way,
just want to say a thanks for all the times you've beared with me during this exam period.
for those who beared with me when i was
tired.
down.
angry.
lethargic.
irritated.
thanks for your unconditional love:)
thanks for the many encouragement cards, many massages, hugs, encouragement, help, errands ran, food supplied and company.
Tuesday, May 06, 2008
hehe.
What do you do on a Tuesday afternoon before your cognitive psych paper?
Search around the net for social issues!
okay. I'm only interested in certain social issues. don't mind me :) blame it on the secondary school background. lol. homosexuality, suicide and the likes.
here's one i read today. i know i'm slow :P
it's the open letter from otto fong (a science teacher from RI) who openly came out of the closet to his colleagues, the school, and as the news went on... the rest of singapore..
good food for thought.
What do you do on a Tuesday afternoon before your cognitive psych paper?
Search around the net for social issues!
okay. I'm only interested in certain social issues. don't mind me :) blame it on the secondary school background. lol. homosexuality, suicide and the likes.
here's one i read today. i know i'm slow :P
it's the open letter from otto fong (a science teacher from RI) who openly came out of the closet to his colleagues, the school, and as the news went on... the rest of singapore..
good food for thought.
Sunday, May 04, 2008
Saturday, May 03, 2008
Went to bathe at computer center just now :)
And saw yanting on the way!:) haha. but she was gone by the time I came back.
:)
I formed a whimsical song about my God in the bathroom. lol. it consists of a regular chirpy tune with rhyming couplets in verses of 4 lines each, with a bridge of 2 lines for every 2 verses. haha. quite fun :)
------------------------
"... love is kind..."
"... it is not self-seeking..."
:)
gratification of the human nature is a big no-no.
Forgetting what is behind and straining towards what is ahead...
looking forward to the day. if it comes. if it doesn't, then it's okay.
------------------------
the mixture of warmth and a cool drizzle
the washing away, a cleansing, a gentle healing
- no more sitting on the porch of indecision,
no more standing under stars of apathy
and it might be easier to dream
but dreaming's not for me -
let your 'yes' be 'yes' and your 'no' be 'no'.
------------------------
And saw yanting on the way!:) haha. but she was gone by the time I came back.
:)
I formed a whimsical song about my God in the bathroom. lol. it consists of a regular chirpy tune with rhyming couplets in verses of 4 lines each, with a bridge of 2 lines for every 2 verses. haha. quite fun :)
------------------------
"... love is kind..."
"... it is not self-seeking..."
:)
gratification of the human nature is a big no-no.
Forgetting what is behind and straining towards what is ahead...
looking forward to the day. if it comes. if it doesn't, then it's okay.
------------------------
the mixture of warmth and a cool drizzle
the washing away, a cleansing, a gentle healing
- no more sitting on the porch of indecision,
no more standing under stars of apathy
and it might be easier to dream
but dreaming's not for me -
let your 'yes' be 'yes' and your 'no' be 'no'.
------------------------
Friday, May 02, 2008
Shepherd of my soul
I give You full control
Wherever You may lead
I will follow
I have made the choice
To listen to Your voice
Wherever You may lead
I will go
Be it in a quiet pasture
Or by a gentle stream
The Shepherd of my soul
Is by my side
Should I face a mighty mountain
Or a valley dark and deep
The Shepherd of my soul
Will be my guide
---------------------------------
This exam period has surprisingly, been my most tiring yet. It doesn't matter that there is a one week break between my first paper and my second, a lot of things suddenly crop up which demand attention in the week itself. Adding on the physical fatigue that I feel, many a times in the week, I can only cry out to God for strength.
God, i need more strength.
God, i need more of Your love to love.
I like being around people. half the time. It'll be good if there's a proportion of being around people. Like maybe 12 hours with people, 12 hours without :) hahaha.
I give You full control
Wherever You may lead
I will follow
I have made the choice
To listen to Your voice
Wherever You may lead
I will go
Be it in a quiet pasture
Or by a gentle stream
The Shepherd of my soul
Is by my side
Should I face a mighty mountain
Or a valley dark and deep
The Shepherd of my soul
Will be my guide
---------------------------------
This exam period has surprisingly, been my most tiring yet. It doesn't matter that there is a one week break between my first paper and my second, a lot of things suddenly crop up which demand attention in the week itself. Adding on the physical fatigue that I feel, many a times in the week, I can only cry out to God for strength.
God, i need more strength.
God, i need more of Your love to love.
I like being around people. half the time. It'll be good if there's a proportion of being around people. Like maybe 12 hours with people, 12 hours without :) hahaha.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
An advertisement for a blog! haha. He didn't ask me to advertise, but then I was thinking, why not? :)
Monday, April 28, 2008
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Today is an exciting day :)
haha.
It started out with prayers for Joyce, Jonathan and Melody at SDE!:)
Then next comes breakfast and more studying for SW2104. except that i didn't feel like studying, so i watched anime while eating breakfast:)
heh. then i figured that i should re read the notes and reconcile what i've studied in the textbook and what to study in the notes=] hehe.
took about an hour to do tt before figuring out that maybe i should just prepare to go to the exam hall. haha :)
thanks jiehui for driving us down to pgp! thanks yizhong and guan for going down with me and praying for me:)
paper was alright :) i got a small shock when i realised i'm sitting at the first seat though. and my friend's sitting beside me! hahaha.
anyway, after tt.. went back classroom. quite tired. fatigued and hungry. lol.
went down for service with calyn and yizhong. when i reached somerset, i was like *O.o* (mind zonked out. lol)
hahaa. a few interesting things happened at nexus.
1) minghan deposited his guinea pig at the reception area!
hahaha. me and gary and celestine were like "guinea pig!! so cute! can eat one or not?" hahaa.
no la. we just went "guinea pig!! so cute! will it bite us? can pet?"
then minghan told us that his guinea pig won't move, won't bite. lol.
yes, the guinea pig doesn't bite!:) hahaa. for ease of calling, the guinea pig's called Silent (named by me. since no sound comes from it).
Silent is very timid! Silent shivers and jumps slightly when you pet and stroke it. lol. that was when Silent was in the carrier. then gary and i decided to pick it out and put it on the carpeted floor :D
to cut the long story short, Silent was not as immobile as we originally thought it was. Silent got bolder and started to move around to explore and then it sniffed and sniffed. we took photos! waiting for gary to send me the photos. LOL.
then it sat beside me for very long. then while we were both looking at it, it made a sound! =D so Silent is not so silent after all. hahaa.
and we were so happy to hear it make a sound that we exclaimed. and then we realised that...
Silent is peeing O.o
on the carpetted nexus floor.
LOL.
and it shitted!
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
so being nice people, we shouted for tissue and picked up the shit. well. can't do anything much with the pee :l
then.
Silent sat down again.
and made another sound.
...
and we asked for tissue again to pick up the second tootsie-roll. lol.
yup.
anyway, i declared that Silent's a girl 'cos it's so timid.
turns out we were wrong when Celestine checked its gender after service.
Silent is a GUY. lol.
2) Someone fainted during service
Heh. poor girl:)
3) I talked to a sister called Alice from the family group :)
actually, when i was talking to her, the word 'respect' came to mind.. reminding me of what pastor shared a few sermons ago :) heh. she's helping out in the registration for the mother's day thing.. so that's why she was here :) haha. found out that she has a daughter in NYP taking business stuff.. hehe. think she's quite pro-poly 'cos of her daughter:) but interesting to hear from her perspective :) hehe. found out that gary's quite smart too! he's got 10 for his O levels, but chose to go poly instead. wow. i have amazing people in my counter :)
4) I made friends with a few poly sisters and brother!
hehe. made friends with gorris (hope i got the name right), xueping, some guy i can't remember and another sister i can't remember the name of:S shucks. anyway, i managed to find out the name of the brother (of which i've also forgotten:S) who stays one bus stop away from me!:) haha. donald. lol. he's the one who offered the inner bus seat for me the first time we took a bus together from yio chu kang and explained that that is what guys should do XD
5) There was no sound from the tvs at reception area today
Don't know what happened. lol. no sound even though the volume display on the tv screen was supposed to be quite loud. hahaa. that's why we have so much time to play with the guinea pig and talk and make friends with each other right? hahahaa.
but i missed the entire sermon. hehe.
Yup :) so that's what happened at nexus.
was quite hungry after service. and felt quite weak. on the way to PS, i was wondering if i'm gonna faint halfway there. lol.
cg dinner:) guan intro-ed an interesting game. can keep in mind for future! lol.
met michelle after dinner :) hahaa.
oh! we walked around carrefour for a bit first. hahaha. our best purchase was that of 2 doryfish fillets about the size of your chicken cutlet and one honey marinated half chicken. guess the price :) ha ha ha. the aunty gave us discount.
then saw carrie and claramae and passed down one fillet. ok. that was quite irrelevant :) hahaa.
talked to michelle for a bit :) i don't know a bit was how long. lol.
but we both missed our last buses home! and i had no money to take Nightrider. actually. i realised i got no bus home from PS :(
so.. we took cab!:) dropped michelle off first before going back to my home:)
talked to the cab driver on the way:) haha. it's a lady driver btw :) i think it's quite rare to see a female cab driver. my first time actually :)
talked to her for a bit :)
we talked about her two children, about driving, about which church she's from (she's from faith methodist! haha. the church building beside the road at commonwealth:D we rented the building for district meeting before:D), about psychological disorders ('cos she has a friend who has a son who kept pulling his hair from young:S), about counsellors in schools (and how they may not be certified..) and about the pediatric ward in kk hospital ('cos she was asking about where her friend's son can get treatment. i really dunno. lol. i only know about this ward 'cos of Dr Tay. the other suggestion i gave was to ask for referral from her GP. heh:)
yup.
and then i reached home.
oh guess what? the lady driver's name's called Alice too!:)
haha.
It started out with prayers for Joyce, Jonathan and Melody at SDE!:)
Then next comes breakfast and more studying for SW2104. except that i didn't feel like studying, so i watched anime while eating breakfast:)
heh. then i figured that i should re read the notes and reconcile what i've studied in the textbook and what to study in the notes=] hehe.
took about an hour to do tt before figuring out that maybe i should just prepare to go to the exam hall. haha :)
thanks jiehui for driving us down to pgp! thanks yizhong and guan for going down with me and praying for me:)
paper was alright :) i got a small shock when i realised i'm sitting at the first seat though. and my friend's sitting beside me! hahaha.
anyway, after tt.. went back classroom. quite tired. fatigued and hungry. lol.
went down for service with calyn and yizhong. when i reached somerset, i was like *O.o* (mind zonked out. lol)
hahaa. a few interesting things happened at nexus.
1) minghan deposited his guinea pig at the reception area!
hahaha. me and gary and celestine were like "guinea pig!! so cute! can eat one or not?" hahaa.
no la. we just went "guinea pig!! so cute! will it bite us? can pet?"
then minghan told us that his guinea pig won't move, won't bite. lol.
yes, the guinea pig doesn't bite!:) hahaa. for ease of calling, the guinea pig's called Silent (named by me. since no sound comes from it).
Silent is very timid! Silent shivers and jumps slightly when you pet and stroke it. lol. that was when Silent was in the carrier. then gary and i decided to pick it out and put it on the carpeted floor :D
to cut the long story short, Silent was not as immobile as we originally thought it was. Silent got bolder and started to move around to explore and then it sniffed and sniffed. we took photos! waiting for gary to send me the photos. LOL.
then it sat beside me for very long. then while we were both looking at it, it made a sound! =D so Silent is not so silent after all. hahaa.
and we were so happy to hear it make a sound that we exclaimed. and then we realised that...
Silent is peeing O.o
on the carpetted nexus floor.
LOL.
and it shitted!
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
so being nice people, we shouted for tissue and picked up the shit. well. can't do anything much with the pee :l
then.
Silent sat down again.
and made another sound.
...
and we asked for tissue again to pick up the second tootsie-roll. lol.
yup.
anyway, i declared that Silent's a girl 'cos it's so timid.
turns out we were wrong when Celestine checked its gender after service.
Silent is a GUY. lol.
2) Someone fainted during service
Heh. poor girl:)
3) I talked to a sister called Alice from the family group :)
actually, when i was talking to her, the word 'respect' came to mind.. reminding me of what pastor shared a few sermons ago :) heh. she's helping out in the registration for the mother's day thing.. so that's why she was here :) haha. found out that she has a daughter in NYP taking business stuff.. hehe. think she's quite pro-poly 'cos of her daughter:) but interesting to hear from her perspective :) hehe. found out that gary's quite smart too! he's got 10 for his O levels, but chose to go poly instead. wow. i have amazing people in my counter :)
4) I made friends with a few poly sisters and brother!
hehe. made friends with gorris (hope i got the name right), xueping, some guy i can't remember and another sister i can't remember the name of:S shucks. anyway, i managed to find out the name of the brother (of which i've also forgotten:S) who stays one bus stop away from me!:) haha. donald. lol. he's the one who offered the inner bus seat for me the first time we took a bus together from yio chu kang and explained that that is what guys should do XD
5) There was no sound from the tvs at reception area today
Don't know what happened. lol. no sound even though the volume display on the tv screen was supposed to be quite loud. hahaa. that's why we have so much time to play with the guinea pig and talk and make friends with each other right? hahahaa.
but i missed the entire sermon. hehe.
Yup :) so that's what happened at nexus.
was quite hungry after service. and felt quite weak. on the way to PS, i was wondering if i'm gonna faint halfway there. lol.
cg dinner:) guan intro-ed an interesting game. can keep in mind for future! lol.
met michelle after dinner :) hahaa.
oh! we walked around carrefour for a bit first. hahaha. our best purchase was that of 2 doryfish fillets about the size of your chicken cutlet and one honey marinated half chicken. guess the price :) ha ha ha. the aunty gave us discount.
then saw carrie and claramae and passed down one fillet. ok. that was quite irrelevant :) hahaa.
talked to michelle for a bit :) i don't know a bit was how long. lol.
but we both missed our last buses home! and i had no money to take Nightrider. actually. i realised i got no bus home from PS :(
so.. we took cab!:) dropped michelle off first before going back to my home:)
talked to the cab driver on the way:) haha. it's a lady driver btw :) i think it's quite rare to see a female cab driver. my first time actually :)
talked to her for a bit :)
we talked about her two children, about driving, about which church she's from (she's from faith methodist! haha. the church building beside the road at commonwealth:D we rented the building for district meeting before:D), about psychological disorders ('cos she has a friend who has a son who kept pulling his hair from young:S), about counsellors in schools (and how they may not be certified..) and about the pediatric ward in kk hospital ('cos she was asking about where her friend's son can get treatment. i really dunno. lol. i only know about this ward 'cos of Dr Tay. the other suggestion i gave was to ask for referral from her GP. heh:)
yup.
and then i reached home.
oh guess what? the lady driver's name's called Alice too!:)
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Boa's songs were accompanying me through the time I was studying for my human development over lifespan exam :) one song particularly stuck to my mind (there're others as well, but can't possibly introduce them all here.) lol. don't think it's the best song in the album, but don't know why it's stuck with me :) maybe it's the way she sings the song :) hahaha. should be quite a famous song i suppose.
you can click here for the kanji lyrics, the romanized lyrics and the translation of the song :) hahaa.
enjoy!
you can click here for the kanji lyrics, the romanized lyrics and the translation of the song :) hahaa.
enjoy!
Friday, April 25, 2008
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Some people need to learn basic courtesy in their lives. Such as asking before using someone else's item. Or asking before peering at someone else's computer screen or textbook for a long time for no reason at all.
It's rude when you don't ask and just assume. I especially hate it when people read others' messages or emails without permission. I think it's an invasion of their privacy.
It's rude when you don't ask and just assume. I especially hate it when people read others' messages or emails without permission. I think it's an invasion of their privacy.
hahaha. Just realised that one of the anime I'm catching --> "Itazura na Kiss (Mischievious Kiss)" is actually very famous. lol. Famous 'cos the Taiwan series 恶作剧之吻 is actually based on the manga!:) hohoho. Exact same plot. おもしろいですよ！
Yes. it's a shoujo anime (girl fiction):P
guys can still watch it if they want though :) lol.
Yes. it's a shoujo anime (girl fiction):P
guys can still watch it if they want though :) lol.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Something i read on a random blog :) hahaa. it's not exactly the most fluent passage, but it's interesting :)
----------------------------------------------
Story By: Anonymous
On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.This was the scene ten years ago.
The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water:
we had a kid;
I went into business and tried to make more money.
When the assets were steadily increasing, the affection between us seemed to ease.
She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school. Our marriage life seemed to been viably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.
Dew came into my life. It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her. Dew said, you are the kind of man who best draws girls' eyeballs. Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we were just married, my wife said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.
Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife. But I couldn't help doing so. I moved Dew's hands aside and said you go to select some furniture,O.K.? I've got something to do in the company.Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised to do it together with her.
At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me. However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt.
Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's body. This was the means of my entertainment.
One day I said to her in a slightly joking way, suppose we divorce, what will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn't imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.
When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking to her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.
Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more. When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I've got something to tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the serious topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer,because my heart had gone to Dew.
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said.Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release.
Late that night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fall asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.
She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but I was supposed to give her one month's time before divorce, and in the month's time we must live as normal a life as possible.
Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn't want him to see our marriage was broken. She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day?
This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I nodded and said, I remember. You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I have a requirement,that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning. I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage romantically.
I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable. My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger.
So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don't tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for a bus, I drove to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this intimate woman carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face.
On the third day, she whispered to me, the outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vague.
On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn't tell Dew about this. I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now. She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I smiled. But Isuddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain.
Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head. Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid Iwould change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms,walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.
On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old. I held her tightly and said, both you and I didn't notice that our life lacked intimacy. I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision.
I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious. She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I can only say sorry to you, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we didn't love each other any more.
Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you. Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove to the office. When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card.
I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until we are old
.......................................................................................................................................................................
'Never take someone for granted cos u'll wake up one day and realise u've lost a Diamond while collecting Stones...'
----------------------------------------------
Story By: Anonymous
On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.This was the scene ten years ago.
The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water:
we had a kid;
I went into business and tried to make more money.
When the assets were steadily increasing, the affection between us seemed to ease.
She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school. Our marriage life seemed to been viably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.
Dew came into my life. It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her. Dew said, you are the kind of man who best draws girls' eyeballs. Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we were just married, my wife said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.
Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife. But I couldn't help doing so. I moved Dew's hands aside and said you go to select some furniture,O.K.? I've got something to do in the company.Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised to do it together with her.
At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me. However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt.
Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's body. This was the means of my entertainment.
One day I said to her in a slightly joking way, suppose we divorce, what will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn't imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.
When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking to her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.
Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more. When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I've got something to tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the serious topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer,because my heart had gone to Dew.
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said.Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release.
Late that night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fall asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.
She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but I was supposed to give her one month's time before divorce, and in the month's time we must live as normal a life as possible.
Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn't want him to see our marriage was broken. She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day?
This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I nodded and said, I remember. You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I have a requirement,that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning. I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage romantically.
I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable. My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger.
So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don't tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for a bus, I drove to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this intimate woman carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face.
On the third day, she whispered to me, the outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vague.
On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn't tell Dew about this. I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now. She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I smiled. But Isuddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain.
Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head. Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid Iwould change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms,walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.
On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old. I held her tightly and said, both you and I didn't notice that our life lacked intimacy. I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision.
I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious. She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I can only say sorry to you, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we didn't love each other any more.
Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you. Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove to the office. When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card.
I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until we are old
.......................................................................................................................................................................
'Never take someone for granted cos u'll wake up one day and realise u've lost a Diamond while collecting Stones...'
it's the time of the year whereby we mug/do work together in the same classroom once again:) hahaa. and for some late night owls, stay overnight to do work together/mug/fellowship. haha.
one person going to school became a family affair when my sister and mum decided to accompany me to school. hahaa. so funny.
i think during service today i was reminded of how i'm a seed planted in my family.. and was praying for my family during service 'cos i felt burdened.. but when i went home and reality hits me, i realised tt it's really much harder to love them than how i thought it was. hahaa. so i just told God honestly that i still find it hard. that it's tough for me to love them much. it's not that i don't love them.. but i think there's an extent of greater love which i can give to them.. a greater love that Jesus would have given to them if He was in my shoes. lol.
so my gracious God reminded me once again of how my family can be :) hahaa. thus the family affair. really quite an enjoyable time of the ride here.. haha. quite a crazy time when we went down the misty road. lol.
but it's a time which kinda changed some of the opinions which i may have formed towards them:) and it made things much easier in my heart.
hope to continue to grow in this area as well:) hehe.
meanwhile, back to studying :) hahaa.
one person going to school became a family affair when my sister and mum decided to accompany me to school. hahaa. so funny.
i think during service today i was reminded of how i'm a seed planted in my family.. and was praying for my family during service 'cos i felt burdened.. but when i went home and reality hits me, i realised tt it's really much harder to love them than how i thought it was. hahaa. so i just told God honestly that i still find it hard. that it's tough for me to love them much. it's not that i don't love them.. but i think there's an extent of greater love which i can give to them.. a greater love that Jesus would have given to them if He was in my shoes. lol.
so my gracious God reminded me once again of how my family can be :) hahaa. thus the family affair. really quite an enjoyable time of the ride here.. haha. quite a crazy time when we went down the misty road. lol.
but it's a time which kinda changed some of the opinions which i may have formed towards them:) and it made things much easier in my heart.
hope to continue to grow in this area as well:) hehe.
meanwhile, back to studying :) hahaa.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Was searching online for information about sheep and saw this prominent website:) I think it's very interesting. haha. particularly check out the section on Smart Sheep, why do sheep follow each other and how sheep protect themselves.. lol.
Monday, April 14, 2008
hehe.
last lesson of TA6 today :) so we took a picture. hahaa. きょはTA6のクラスはおわりますから、写真を撮りました。
Sensei sent the photo to us ('cos we used his phone.. and two other phones.. to take the photos) and a msg to encourage us for the oral exams:) hahaa.
"TA6のみなさん
写真があまりきれいじゃありませんが、送りますね。
みなさん、ありがとうございました。
私も楽しかったですよ。
オーラルテストと試験がんばりましょうね。
ながみ
The photo taken is note very pretty/nice, but I've sent it over.
Everyone, thanks.
I also had fun.
All the best for your oral examinations
Nagami"
when i read the first line, i was like "hahaha." really あまりじゃありません。lol.
hahhaa. have been catching this cat anime series (for children i think) on crunchyroll. super cute. super funny. hahaa. i think it's funny anyway :)
First episode can be found here. hahaha.
First episode can be found here. hahaha.
Friday, April 11, 2008
Thursday, April 10, 2008
heh.
got reminded of radiolitez tonight :) haha.
wanna hear how i sounded like in the past when i was deejaying?
found a clip with my voice on it (accidentally. 'cos was using a programme to rip songs off the radio airwaves XD). haha.
here it is: (if you wanna listen to it. that is. the first clip is my deejaying before the songs. the second clip starts with the songs and end with my voice. lol you can listen to 2 songs that i really like as well. especially bryan adams' 'when you love a woman'. not everyone will agree with my taste though.)
i still have firestarter's version of 'more than words'. lol.
----
heh. i guess maybe i do get quite affected if my voice is gone for a longer time than expected. especially with auditions coming up:S
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
「Congratulations! You were waiting in the Gold Exchange Queue to exchange 500 munny for 10 Gold... and now you have been selected!
There were 53560 people in the Gold Exchange Queue.
Your place in the Queue was: 21069 away from the front.
10 Gold has been deposited into your (fluff)Friends Account, which you can now spend at the Golden (fluff)Shop:
http://apps.facebook.com/fluff/gold_shop.php」
lol? alright! haha.
There were 53560 people in the Gold Exchange Queue.
Your place in the Queue was: 21069 away from the front.
10 Gold has been deposited into your (fluff)Friends Account, which you can now spend at the Golden (fluff)Shop:
http://apps.facebook.com/fluff/gold_shop.php」
lol? alright! haha.
XxxHolic:Kei (season 2 of XxxHolic is out!:D)
きれいなゆこさんとわたぬきくんとどうめきくん。
XxｘHolic が だいすきです！
[Editted by Xin Ying. Please credit. LOL]
きれいですよ！
(pretty right!)
hahaha:)
きれいなゆこさんとわたぬきくんとどうめきくん。
XxｘHolic が だいすきです！
[Editted by Xin Ying. Please credit. LOL]
きれいですよ！
(pretty right!)
hahaha:)
Tuesday, April 08, 2008
Monday, April 07, 2008
Starting on Code Geass soon. hahaa. I know I'm slow :) it's an anime by CLAMP:) hehehe. I just finished a few series in these few weeks (shigofumi, bamboo blade and i can't remember what..).
Some people think I'm slacking when I'm watching anime. Or that they think that I don't do work just 'cos I watch anime at HQ. lol. I don't believe in doing work in front of people just to show that I'm doing work, yet slacking at home and not doing anything after going back home.
I don't think I have more time than other people, or that I have less things to do than other people. Well, maybe at this moment I do have much lesser things to do than other people, since I've finished all my projects. Have a programming test next friday, and japanese oral test next wednesday.
According to Bryan, Okada sensei said that it's better to listen to the Nihongo CD for 10 mins a day everyday, rather than one hour for one day and neglect the language for the rest of the week. hehee. watching anime helps me to build up my listening skills!:) lol. but i realised that i'm really quite far away from the standard.. haha. was watching the raw (no subtitles) version of some shin-chan.. could catch the rough meaning, but some things just went past me without me understanding it. lol.
anyway, i've got time to watch anime because:
1) I don't stone. I either do work, or take a nap, or watch anime.
2) It's my passion. And we need to set aside time for our passion as well:) hahaa. I learn things through anime as well. Some people stone while watching TV or anime. I absorb and evaluate. Ask me for an evaluation of the anime series I've watched anytime.. and I'll tell you what I've learned from it, or derived from it:) hahaa. I derive much visual pleasure from anime :)
3) I procrastinate doing some stuff. hahaha. Sad to say, I do procrastinate in doing some not-so-enjoyable tasks that don't require immediate attention (e.g. not due in the next 3 days.)
lalala.
:)
Some people think I'm slacking when I'm watching anime. Or that they think that I don't do work just 'cos I watch anime at HQ. lol. I don't believe in doing work in front of people just to show that I'm doing work, yet slacking at home and not doing anything after going back home.
I don't think I have more time than other people, or that I have less things to do than other people. Well, maybe at this moment I do have much lesser things to do than other people, since I've finished all my projects. Have a programming test next friday, and japanese oral test next wednesday.
According to Bryan, Okada sensei said that it's better to listen to the Nihongo CD for 10 mins a day everyday, rather than one hour for one day and neglect the language for the rest of the week. hehee. watching anime helps me to build up my listening skills!:) lol. but i realised that i'm really quite far away from the standard.. haha. was watching the raw (no subtitles) version of some shin-chan.. could catch the rough meaning, but some things just went past me without me understanding it. lol.
anyway, i've got time to watch anime because:
1) I don't stone. I either do work, or take a nap, or watch anime.
2) It's my passion. And we need to set aside time for our passion as well:) hahaa. I learn things through anime as well. Some people stone while watching TV or anime. I absorb and evaluate. Ask me for an evaluation of the anime series I've watched anytime.. and I'll tell you what I've learned from it, or derived from it:) hahaa. I derive much visual pleasure from anime :)
3) I procrastinate doing some stuff. hahaha. Sad to say, I do procrastinate in doing some not-so-enjoyable tasks that don't require immediate attention (e.g. not due in the next 3 days.)
lalala.
:)
From a mailing list:
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."
Charles H. Spurgeon said, "Stars may be seen from the bottom of a deep well when they cannot be seen from the top of the mountain. So many things are learned in adversity which the prosperous man dreams not of."
Ovid wrote, "The road to triumph is built by adversity."
Walt Disney stated: "All the adversity I've had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me.... You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you."
John Adams agreed. He said, "People and nations are forged in the fires of adversity."
Patrick Henry believed that "adversity toughens manhood, and the characteristic of the good or the great man, is not that he has been exempted from the evils of life, but that he has surmounted them."2
And as Stan Mitchell said, "The child of God cannot attain spiritual completeness without facing trials. The Africans have a saying: 'After the rain, come the flowers.'" And then Mitchell asks, "So how does your garden grow?"
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."
Charles H. Spurgeon said, "Stars may be seen from the bottom of a deep well when they cannot be seen from the top of the mountain. So many things are learned in adversity which the prosperous man dreams not of."
Ovid wrote, "The road to triumph is built by adversity."
Walt Disney stated: "All the adversity I've had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me.... You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you."
John Adams agreed. He said, "People and nations are forged in the fires of adversity."
Patrick Henry believed that "adversity toughens manhood, and the characteristic of the good or the great man, is not that he has been exempted from the evils of life, but that he has surmounted them."2
And as Stan Mitchell said, "The child of God cannot attain spiritual completeness without facing trials. The Africans have a saying: 'After the rain, come the flowers.'" And then Mitchell asks, "So how does your garden grow?"
thank God for my mum! hahaa. she's decided to sponsor part of my camp fees. wahaha. apparently she doesn't like the idea of a loan (--> pride?) and so has decided to sponsor a part of it :)
hehehe.
and we've decided to go on a holiday as a family (eh. or rather, me and my mum have decided) in july:) to hongkong (again!)
hah. we've never gone on a holiday as a family in our whole entire lives. my mum has never gone on a plane before. hehe. so it'll be はじめて for the かぞうく. いいです！:)
i've been mixing up the usage of がandを in にほんご。need もっと れんしゅう と ふくしゅう！
にほんごはきれいごですが、むずかしいです。
わたしはちょっとねむいくてつかれましたです。でも、しゅくだいをしませんから、まだ寝ます。かわいそですよ。
哈哈哈。
がんばりますよ！
^^
にほんごはたのしいですね。みんあ、わたしのblog post はよくわかりますか。
@[^.^]=====@@======[^^]@ ---> whoosh?
えと。
さよなら？
バーイバーイ！
<[^.^]~
hehehe.
and we've decided to go on a holiday as a family (eh. or rather, me and my mum have decided) in july:) to hongkong (again!)
hah. we've never gone on a holiday as a family in our whole entire lives. my mum has never gone on a plane before. hehe. so it'll be はじめて for the かぞうく. いいです！:)
i've been mixing up the usage of がandを in にほんご。need もっと れんしゅう と ふくしゅう！
にほんごはきれいごですが、むずかしいです。
わたしはちょっとねむいくてつかれましたです。でも、しゅくだいをしませんから、まだ寝ます。かわいそですよ。
哈哈哈。
がんばりますよ！
^^
にほんごはたのしいですね。みんあ、わたしのblog post はよくわかりますか。
@[^.^]=====@@======[^^]@ ---> whoosh?
えと。
さよなら？
バーイバーイ！
<[^.^]~
Sunday, April 06, 2008
I feel like doing the running man. hhahaha.
Someone should choreograph a dance to 'Friends in high places'.
Speaking of dances..
What Calyn mentioned on a bus trip home one day reminded me that..
I want to learn social dancing too! Influence from secondary school and from theatre studies. hahaa.
No partner though. lol.
Calyn don't wanna learn with me!
I've also wanted to learn sign language! but no one else wanted to learn with me! lol
Someone should choreograph a dance to 'Friends in high places'.
Speaking of dances..
What Calyn mentioned on a bus trip home one day reminded me that..
I want to learn social dancing too! Influence from secondary school and from theatre studies. hahaa.
No partner though. lol.
Calyn don't wanna learn with me!
I've also wanted to learn sign language! but no one else wanted to learn with me! lol
Ah. I'm very excited. hahaha.
I haven't felt this excited since receiving the call from Gwen 3 years ago. hahaha. It's the adrenaline that comes from receiving a good challenge! It's the fear that causes your heart to beat slightly faster than normal. It's the excitement that accompanies that fear, knowing you're stepping further into God's future for you, uncertain of where you're going, but excited of what's ahead!
I was so excited I was jumping around in my room. hahaa. okayokay. Please don't have the impression that I do that often.
I'm actually a very serious person :)
But right now.. I'm excited. hahaa.
-supernatural rain
is carrying destiny!-
So many changes up ahead! So many challenges. woohooo!
I haven't felt this excited since receiving the call from Gwen 3 years ago. hahaha. It's the adrenaline that comes from receiving a good challenge! It's the fear that causes your heart to beat slightly faster than normal. It's the excitement that accompanies that fear, knowing you're stepping further into God's future for you, uncertain of where you're going, but excited of what's ahead!
I was so excited I was jumping around in my room. hahaa. okayokay. Please don't have the impression that I do that often.
I'm actually a very serious person :)
But right now.. I'm excited. hahaa.
-supernatural rain
is carrying destiny!-
So many changes up ahead! So many challenges. woohooo!
Jesse and I and Hui Li...
are going for
Adults Camp together!
(if we can settle payment by today :l)
woohoo!
hahaha.
are going for
Adults Camp together!
(if we can settle payment by today :l)
woohoo!
hahaha.
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
Need love vs Gift love.
Need love is when you say you want to be loved. E.g. I need a hug. I need someone to appreciate me.
Gift love is when you give of yourself. I love you, so I give. It's like the giving of love from parents to children, the giving of Mother Theresa to the people on the streets of Calcutta.
Need pleasure vs appreciation pleasure.
Need pleasure is when you have a need... and when that need is fulfilled, the pleasure that comes from it is need pleasure. Take for example, after running the Army Half Marathon, you're perspiring and sweating and all you want is to a cold cup of milo and the chance to just walk around, cool down and enjoy the slight warm breeze, and when you get all of it, you go 'ahh..' there's a sense of satisfaction, a sense of pleasure. That is need pleasure.
Appreciation pleasure is that sense of awe, that sense of appreciation at something you didn't anticipate. It's like you're sitting by the side of the sea, and all of a sudden you realise there's a beautiful sunset in front of your eyes. And you just pause and say to yourself 'wow. I'm gonna just take some time to drink it in.' That. is appreciation pleasure. You didn't plan for it, but it appeared anyway, and it brings you great pleasure.
------------------
the 4 types of love..
Eros
Philia
Storge
Agape
Which is yours? Can it really be defined so clearly?
------------------
Need love is when you say you want to be loved. E.g. I need a hug. I need someone to appreciate me.
Gift love is when you give of yourself. I love you, so I give. It's like the giving of love from parents to children, the giving of Mother Theresa to the people on the streets of Calcutta.
Need pleasure vs appreciation pleasure.
Need pleasure is when you have a need... and when that need is fulfilled, the pleasure that comes from it is need pleasure. Take for example, after running the Army Half Marathon, you're perspiring and sweating and all you want is to a cold cup of milo and the chance to just walk around, cool down and enjoy the slight warm breeze, and when you get all of it, you go 'ahh..' there's a sense of satisfaction, a sense of pleasure. That is need pleasure.
Appreciation pleasure is that sense of awe, that sense of appreciation at something you didn't anticipate. It's like you're sitting by the side of the sea, and all of a sudden you realise there's a beautiful sunset in front of your eyes. And you just pause and say to yourself 'wow. I'm gonna just take some time to drink it in.' That. is appreciation pleasure. You didn't plan for it, but it appeared anyway, and it brings you great pleasure.
------------------
the 4 types of love..
Eros
Philia
Storge
Agape
Which is yours? Can it really be defined so clearly?
------------------
Ah. From Beyond at Blk 5.., we're moving on to Grace Haven instead. Think will be quite an exciting time!:) Tougher time perhaps? 'cos heard from the previous volunteers there that it's tough at the beginning 'cos there's a lot of rejections at first... but fulfilling in the end. It's okay! i can take rejections :) Looking forward to the fulfilling end!:)
The months have played a fool of me
The weeks the days the busy the free
The sun that shone its daily light
The flight in sky of every night
The shimmering of eyes gazed above
The transience of a heart that loves
The temporal glimpse of happiness
The weighing truth that none rehearse
The death of thought that died but once
The hope that rose with a single glance
The deceit that courses through the blood
The path to take, a decision too hard
The poem which started with a single thought
The components of soul which were fought
The poem, unknown, with the context hidden
The poet, unshaken, with a farewell bidden.
--------Copyrighted by Xin Ying :) ---------
Not that anyone's gonna use the poem above. lol
3 rounds 3 round. hahaa. let's see if i can get it to 4 rounds :)
enlarging my right earhole once again.. see if i got the mood to properly continue to enlarge it. the max i got was only 6 ear sticks in before? hmmm.
The weeks the days the busy the free
The sun that shone its daily light
The flight in sky of every night
The shimmering of eyes gazed above
The transience of a heart that loves
The temporal glimpse of happiness
The weighing truth that none rehearse
The death of thought that died but once
The hope that rose with a single glance
The deceit that courses through the blood
The path to take, a decision too hard
The poem which started with a single thought
The components of soul which were fought
The poem, unknown, with the context hidden
The poet, unshaken, with a farewell bidden.
--------Copyrighted by Xin Ying :) ---------
Not that anyone's gonna use the poem above. lol
3 rounds 3 round. hahaa. let's see if i can get it to 4 rounds :)
enlarging my right earhole once again.. see if i got the mood to properly continue to enlarge it. the max i got was only 6 ear sticks in before? hmmm.
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers." - Galatians 6:9-10
i think it is particularly frustrating when someone knows you're sick, and yet does not show concern, being preoccupied with the routine of what is to be done. makes me wanna go '...'
i think it is particularly frustrating when someone knows you're sick, and yet does not show concern, being preoccupied with the routine of what is to be done. makes me wanna go '...'
Monday, March 31, 2008
hehe. i dislike falling sick :) but i dislike having coughs more. hahaa.
'cos if it's a fever, or a cold (to do with the nose), it doesn't affect me as much as a cough :)
went to the doctor today and doctor said i had an asthmatic episode. or rather, was still having an asthmatic episode. that probably explains why my lungs felt inflammed and why i couldn't breathe deeply at all. hahaa. have been having short fast breaths..no wheezing though.
guess i still have much to learn about asthma. haha. despite having lived with it for 22 years of my life.
and here i was sincerely thinking that it's normal for everyone to not be able to breath properly during a cough. oh well.
not bad ah. can still walk around and do things even during an asthmatic episode. a young body is good. haha.
decreased sense of taste, decreased sense of smell. and a groggy feeling all day even though my medicine is non-drowsy. think my body really needs the rest to recover. i keep sleeping. i'll be typing something halfway and feel really exhausted.
didn't go to school today 'cos i couldn't stand up. haha. quite sian diao 'cos i didn't complete my lab (again!!!!) and i didn't go to japanese TA. and what i wanted to do today had to be postponed to another day.
but got my MC! hahaa. and the doctor gave me a 2 days MC! hahaa. haven't got an MC since secondary school? haha. haven't been to the doctor since secondary school!
medicine really does wonders (though i don't like to take it. haha) it opened up my lungs happily.
i like taking deep breaths :) hahaa.
being sick caused me to think about some irrelevant things:
1) i like colours in my entry! hahaa. like this:
God Loves You!
2) Natural birth is really much better. Reduced allergies and asthma. haha. next time you wanna give birth to a child, for the child's sake, please endure the pain and go through a natural birth:) it'll not leave scars on your body as well.
3) falling sick causes me to want to just cuddle up in something warm and sleep and ignore the world for a moment or so. like cuddling up in an egg. haha. also cause me to want to **** *******'s **** and **** ** *** ******** and sleep.
'cos if it's a fever, or a cold (to do with the nose), it doesn't affect me as much as a cough :)
went to the doctor today and doctor said i had an asthmatic episode. or rather, was still having an asthmatic episode. that probably explains why my lungs felt inflammed and why i couldn't breathe deeply at all. hahaa. have been having short fast breaths..no wheezing though.
guess i still have much to learn about asthma. haha. despite having lived with it for 22 years of my life.
and here i was sincerely thinking that it's normal for everyone to not be able to breath properly during a cough. oh well.
not bad ah. can still walk around and do things even during an asthmatic episode. a young body is good. haha.
decreased sense of taste, decreased sense of smell. and a groggy feeling all day even though my medicine is non-drowsy. think my body really needs the rest to recover. i keep sleeping. i'll be typing something halfway and feel really exhausted.
didn't go to school today 'cos i couldn't stand up. haha. quite sian diao 'cos i didn't complete my lab (again!!!!) and i didn't go to japanese TA. and what i wanted to do today had to be postponed to another day.
but got my MC! hahaa. and the doctor gave me a 2 days MC! hahaa. haven't got an MC since secondary school? haha. haven't been to the doctor since secondary school!
medicine really does wonders (though i don't like to take it. haha) it opened up my lungs happily.
i like taking deep breaths :) hahaa.
being sick caused me to think about some irrelevant things:
1) i like colours in my entry! hahaa. like this:
God Loves You!
2) Natural birth is really much better. Reduced allergies and asthma. haha. next time you wanna give birth to a child, for the child's sake, please endure the pain and go through a natural birth:) it'll not leave scars on your body as well.
3) falling sick causes me to want to just cuddle up in something warm and sleep and ignore the world for a moment or so. like cuddling up in an egg. haha. also cause me to want to **** *******'s **** and **** ** *** ******** and sleep.
Saturday, March 29, 2008
i remember this cg too:)
From huichun's blog once again..
'Next was caregroup...had a good time of praise and worship...all 4 of us had prophecies from God! WOW!!! Guess God's spirit was really present and evident...den had a simple yet meaningful activity cum sharing.'
heh. Last time when i was in PT group, we only have 4 people in the caregroup - huichun, ziwei, me and jitsy :) used to have 5 (including junting).. but junting rose up to the position of a UL to take care of another unit.. so left the 4 of us:)
so service attendance and cg attendance always the same... haha. 4 4 4 4 4 4. haha. but quite exciting ah :) hahaa. it was definitely OUR CG. haha.
think sometimes when the group gets too big, people might not take so much ownership of the group as well. or people don't see the need to sacrifice a bit more. let's be people who take ownership of the things we're given, regardless of the size of the cg, ok?:) there's a reason as to why God has placed certain people and things in our lives.
From huichun's blog once again..
'Next was caregroup...had a good time of praise and worship...all 4 of us had prophecies from God! WOW!!! Guess God's spirit was really present and evident...den had a simple yet meaningful activity cum sharing.'
heh. Last time when i was in PT group, we only have 4 people in the caregroup - huichun, ziwei, me and jitsy :) used to have 5 (including junting).. but junting rose up to the position of a UL to take care of another unit.. so left the 4 of us:)
so service attendance and cg attendance always the same... haha. 4 4 4 4 4 4. haha. but quite exciting ah :) hahaa. it was definitely OUR CG. haha.
think sometimes when the group gets too big, people might not take so much ownership of the group as well. or people don't see the need to sacrifice a bit more. let's be people who take ownership of the things we're given, regardless of the size of the cg, ok?:) there's a reason as to why God has placed certain people and things in our lives.
Excerpts from my younger days!:)
18th August 2003 (Entry from huichun's blog):
'After svs went meridian for lunch. oh btw saw jingyun after svs in nexus...so happy to see her, excited abt discussin which econs tut to choose. jitsy n ziwei went home, so only junting, xinying and myself for lunch, wenjiang joined in too...had an impromptu discussion on 'Is it a sin to leave food behind?' It all started bcos i cant finish the bowl of noodles i bought. den xinying poses another one 'issit a sin to kill ants?' haha...quite a meaningful lunch after all, we got a yogurt treat from derek too...so encouraging of him!'
that same day.. in the morning
'gee...today's the first lesson of Basic Christian Doctrine 2, in an educational institute inside specialist shoppin centre, 6th floor, east wing, room 4. Quite an interesting course. PT side only got junting, xinying, sharon, marcus, chongyao attending...but got lotsa other uni brothers n sisters i noe well...like JoYcE, karen, kim chun, yeu ann etc....A new and comfortable environment, hopefully i dun doze off during the classes :p Our class abit quiet though, keep hearin lotsa laughters from the room left of ours...but its ok..shirley and tony still doin fine in engagin the ppl's attention. i'd rather they dun force themselves to crack jokes, cos they'll bcum cold jokes haha...just jokin! lookin forward to next lesson.:)'
--> My first WFL lesson! hahaha.
18th August 2003 (Entry from huichun's blog):
'After svs went meridian for lunch. oh btw saw jingyun after svs in nexus...so happy to see her, excited abt discussin which econs tut to choose. jitsy n ziwei went home, so only junting, xinying and myself for lunch, wenjiang joined in too...had an impromptu discussion on 'Is it a sin to leave food behind?' It all started bcos i cant finish the bowl of noodles i bought. den xinying poses another one 'issit a sin to kill ants?' haha...quite a meaningful lunch after all, we got a yogurt treat from derek too...so encouraging of him!'
that same day.. in the morning
'gee...today's the first lesson of Basic Christian Doctrine 2, in an educational institute inside specialist shoppin centre, 6th floor, east wing, room 4. Quite an interesting course. PT side only got junting, xinying, sharon, marcus, chongyao attending...but got lotsa other uni brothers n sisters i noe well...like JoYcE, karen, kim chun, yeu ann etc....A new and comfortable environment, hopefully i dun doze off during the classes :p Our class abit quiet though, keep hearin lotsa laughters from the room left of ours...but its ok..shirley and tony still doin fine in engagin the ppl's attention. i'd rather they dun force themselves to crack jokes, cos they'll bcum cold jokes haha...just jokin! lookin forward to next lesson.:)'
--> My first WFL lesson! hahaha.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
hahaha. this is silly.. but i'm suddenly really excited about saturday. hahaa. and the amazing thing is that we're having service on sunday instead of saturday this week! why is it exciting to me? 'cos...
Saturday is my spiritual birthday! hahaha. and when i first received Christ, it was also a saturday! and the service was on sunday! hahaha. so can you imagine how excited i am? seems like we're having a similar situation! =D okayokay. i'm mad. hahaa.
you know..
many people think that by receiving Christ, or by putting the work of God first in their lives, they'll lose out on a lot of other things that they can do... losing out on other opportunities in life.. they view the things they do as a sacrifice.. the sacrifice of time, the sacrifice of money, the sacrifice of their lives...
to me, i think if i didn't know Christ, my life will not be as vibrant as now. i won't have the inner confidence, the inner joy and the inner assurance that comes from God alone.
it's not that i didn't have a vibrant life before coming to know Christ. I had my friends, i could do what i want.. i did what i enjoyed (e.g. playing online games and reading up on stuff) and manages to get myself into relatively good schools even while slacking quite a bit:S lol.
but i think it was only after coming to know Christ that i see that better life.
To me, it's not so much a matter of sacrifice... it's more of a matter of I can't give back enough?
'Cos what God has given me through these years is much more than what i can ever repay Him for. it's not really a debt either? gratitude perhaps?
i guess if i'm not a Christ follower, i might not even be alive?
or i might be out there getting myself involved in relationships, or just being caught up with what the whole world is involved in (e.g. jobs..) swept up in the current of studying, enjoying my studies, getting a job, earning money, paying debts, then what?
i enjoy the life of being able to invest my life in people.. 'cos when people's lives change, you'll be so amazed at their potential and the things they can do. i enjoy the life of doing things with the knowledge that God has planned out a future for me.. 'cos it enables me to do what i do with a greater purpose.. and having a purpose in life --> is that not what everyone seeks to have... just that some people have given up that notion and decided to adopt the idea of living day by day due to fatigue or lack of encouragement or support.
you know how there used to be an email thread that reminds people about how at the end of the day, you do not remember how well you did for psle, o levels, a levels or uni years.. you remember the people who encouraged you when you were down, was there to help when you needed that help.. you remember the people who loved you regardless of your flaws, who knew how ugly you are on the inside and still accept you.. who genuinely wants to help you along..
i want to be the kind of person that people will remember at the end of the day.
and that's why i do what i do.
at the end of the day, when you are successful.. do you not hope that someone gets impacted by your success and get influenced by you as well?
i don't think i've much regretted being a Christ follower :) having my sins wiped away. given a new sheet of life. having strength and joy everyday despite what happens in my life. able to impact the lives of others...
there were a few times in the course of the past year.. when i was thinking about how even if i knew i was going to die soon (probably due to the modules i've been taking), i don't think i'll have much regrets. i've done most of the things i want to do.. and i've seen the impact of my life on others..
i would probably be sad. who wouldn't? but i know i'll see some of the people i love soon in the place that i'm going. and i can rest in the arms of God, finally able to see my Savior face to face and ask Him questions which I've always wanted to find out.
i cried the bitterest (if there's such word) cry in these 5 years. i've laughed the most heartfelt laughter in these 5 years too. i've done stupid things. but all in all, God preserved me and moulded me. and changed me. for the better.
yup. so tht's me :) and my reflections on my 5 year walk with God --> wah! so long! when i just came to know Christ, i remember thinking about how i don't think i'll be able to last 5 years with God. hahahaha.
Saturday is my spiritual birthday! hahaha. and when i first received Christ, it was also a saturday! and the service was on sunday! hahaha. so can you imagine how excited i am? seems like we're having a similar situation! =D okayokay. i'm mad. hahaa.
you know..
many people think that by receiving Christ, or by putting the work of God first in their lives, they'll lose out on a lot of other things that they can do... losing out on other opportunities in life.. they view the things they do as a sacrifice.. the sacrifice of time, the sacrifice of money, the sacrifice of their lives...
to me, i think if i didn't know Christ, my life will not be as vibrant as now. i won't have the inner confidence, the inner joy and the inner assurance that comes from God alone.
it's not that i didn't have a vibrant life before coming to know Christ. I had my friends, i could do what i want.. i did what i enjoyed (e.g. playing online games and reading up on stuff) and manages to get myself into relatively good schools even while slacking quite a bit:S lol.
but i think it was only after coming to know Christ that i see that better life.
To me, it's not so much a matter of sacrifice... it's more of a matter of I can't give back enough?
'Cos what God has given me through these years is much more than what i can ever repay Him for. it's not really a debt either? gratitude perhaps?
i guess if i'm not a Christ follower, i might not even be alive?
or i might be out there getting myself involved in relationships, or just being caught up with what the whole world is involved in (e.g. jobs..) swept up in the current of studying, enjoying my studies, getting a job, earning money, paying debts, then what?
i enjoy the life of being able to invest my life in people.. 'cos when people's lives change, you'll be so amazed at their potential and the things they can do. i enjoy the life of doing things with the knowledge that God has planned out a future for me.. 'cos it enables me to do what i do with a greater purpose.. and having a purpose in life --> is that not what everyone seeks to have... just that some people have given up that notion and decided to adopt the idea of living day by day due to fatigue or lack of encouragement or support.
you know how there used to be an email thread that reminds people about how at the end of the day, you do not remember how well you did for psle, o levels, a levels or uni years.. you remember the people who encouraged you when you were down, was there to help when you needed that help.. you remember the people who loved you regardless of your flaws, who knew how ugly you are on the inside and still accept you.. who genuinely wants to help you along..
i want to be the kind of person that people will remember at the end of the day.
and that's why i do what i do.
at the end of the day, when you are successful.. do you not hope that someone gets impacted by your success and get influenced by you as well?
i don't think i've much regretted being a Christ follower :) having my sins wiped away. given a new sheet of life. having strength and joy everyday despite what happens in my life. able to impact the lives of others...
there were a few times in the course of the past year.. when i was thinking about how even if i knew i was going to die soon (probably due to the modules i've been taking), i don't think i'll have much regrets. i've done most of the things i want to do.. and i've seen the impact of my life on others..
i would probably be sad. who wouldn't? but i know i'll see some of the people i love soon in the place that i'm going. and i can rest in the arms of God, finally able to see my Savior face to face and ask Him questions which I've always wanted to find out.
i cried the bitterest (if there's such word) cry in these 5 years. i've laughed the most heartfelt laughter in these 5 years too. i've done stupid things. but all in all, God preserved me and moulded me. and changed me. for the better.
yup. so tht's me :) and my reflections on my 5 year walk with God --> wah! so long! when i just came to know Christ, i remember thinking about how i don't think i'll be able to last 5 years with God. hahahaha.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
I really don't like to do essays in schools because of
1) I get stressed out by the presence of people
2) It's very distracting
3) I'm more productive doing essays at home, in the comfort of my room, shut off against the world, with the fan behind me and my cat locked outside.
4) * **** **** ** ******** ** ******. **'* **** *'* ****** ** ** ** *** ***** *** ****** **** ** *** ** ** **********, *** **** **** **** ****** **** ** ** **** *** **** **** *** ******* *** *******. lol.
5) I don't have to move from place to place.
XD
1) I get stressed out by the presence of people
2) It's very distracting
3) I'm more productive doing essays at home, in the comfort of my room, shut off against the world, with the fan behind me and my cat locked outside.
4) * **** **** ** ******** ** ******. **'* **** *'* ****** ** ** ** *** ***** *** ****** **** ** *** ** ** **********, *** **** **** **** ****** **** ** ** **** *** **** **** *** ******* *** *******. lol.
5) I don't have to move from place to place.
XD
Last week when I was down and out, God used this passage to encourage me greatly :) Want to share this.. it might not speak to you as much as it has spoken to me because I can identify with it, but i hope that in some way or another, it will encourage you in your walk with God as well :)
A Call to Persevere
Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of our faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing - but let us encourage one another - and all the more as you see the Day approaching.
If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left, but only a fearful expectation of judgement and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God. Anyone who rejected the law of Moses died without mercy on the testimony of two or three witnesses. How much more severely do you think a man deserves to be punished who has trampled the Son of God under foot, who has treated as an unholy thing the blood of the convenant that sacrificed him, and who has insulted the Spirit of grace? For we know him who said, "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," and again, "The Lord will judge his people." It is a dreadful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.
Remember those earlier days after you had received the light, when you stood your ground in a great contest in the face of suffering. Sometimes you were publicly exposed to insult and persecution; at other times you stood side by side with those who were so treated. You sympathised with those in prison and joyfully accepted the confiscation of your property, because you knew that you yourselves had better and lasting possessions.
So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. For in just a very little while,
"He who is coming will come and will not delay.
But my righteous one will live by faith.
And if he shrinks back,
I will not be pleased with him."
But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who believe and are saved.
[Hebrews 10:19-39, NIV. emphasis - mine.]
------------------------------
I feel very loved :)
Loved by God who proved to be faithful through the times.
Loved by people who know me and love me.
A Call to Persevere
Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of our faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing - but let us encourage one another - and all the more as you see the Day approaching.
If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left, but only a fearful expectation of judgement and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God. Anyone who rejected the law of Moses died without mercy on the testimony of two or three witnesses. How much more severely do you think a man deserves to be punished who has trampled the Son of God under foot, who has treated as an unholy thing the blood of the convenant that sacrificed him, and who has insulted the Spirit of grace? For we know him who said, "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," and again, "The Lord will judge his people." It is a dreadful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.
Remember those earlier days after you had received the light, when you stood your ground in a great contest in the face of suffering. Sometimes you were publicly exposed to insult and persecution; at other times you stood side by side with those who were so treated. You sympathised with those in prison and joyfully accepted the confiscation of your property, because you knew that you yourselves had better and lasting possessions.
So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. For in just a very little while,
"He who is coming will come and will not delay.
But my righteous one will live by faith.
And if he shrinks back,
I will not be pleased with him."
But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who believe and are saved.
[Hebrews 10:19-39, NIV. emphasis - mine.]
------------------------------
I feel very loved :)
Loved by God who proved to be faithful through the times.
Loved by people who know me and love me.
Sunday, March 23, 2008
-every blessing You pour out
i'll turn back to praise
when the darkness closes in Lord
still i will say
blessed be the name of the Lord
blessed be Your name
blessed be the name of the Lord
blessed be Your glorious name
You give and take away
You give and take away
my heart will choose to say
blessed be Your name-
it's been around 1 week since i've got the news :) think for the past 1 week, i've been wondering what to say, how to say...
the thoughts i have are but my own. thoughts not fully fleshed in sharing to people. different understandings.
i'm so glad to be able to talk to michelle today :) so glad to realise that she actually knows me more than the extent i thought she knows me at. when she thought what she thought would have been my choice in this matter, i was so amazed that she knew. and i'm so glad she knows. felt very comforted in this.
guess i still need to settle certain emotions in my heart.. but all in all, i still love God for who He is.
i'll turn back to praise
when the darkness closes in Lord
still i will say
blessed be the name of the Lord
blessed be Your name
blessed be the name of the Lord
blessed be Your glorious name
You give and take away
You give and take away
my heart will choose to say
blessed be Your name-
it's been around 1 week since i've got the news :) think for the past 1 week, i've been wondering what to say, how to say...
the thoughts i have are but my own. thoughts not fully fleshed in sharing to people. different understandings.
i'm so glad to be able to talk to michelle today :) so glad to realise that she actually knows me more than the extent i thought she knows me at. when she thought what she thought would have been my choice in this matter, i was so amazed that she knew. and i'm so glad she knows. felt very comforted in this.
guess i still need to settle certain emotions in my heart.. but all in all, i still love God for who He is.
Saturday, March 22, 2008
Something I got from Christine
Something She got from Jacq.
I think it conveys very raw thoughts and emotions :)
here it is:
i miss u. i miss the times when we spent tgt. i miss ur undivided attention. i miss those days where i am always placed first. i miss those days where u would do anything for me even to the extent of pain. i miss those days where u would just say u love me, me only. i miss u. i miss u dearly. i cant help but to suppress my desire for u. i yearn for the touch u gave and the days where the world is jus revolving between u and me. these times spent is irreplaceable.
i never wanted to live so badly.
i can only say it is gone. i can only say i choose not to have u. i am having intense regret for the pressured decision made. i chose to walk out on u, i chose to avoid u, i chose to just live in pretense. T.T i doubt ur existence.
i stopped living. i cant celebrate with u when u had victory nor can i smile at u to say u did it. i chose to turn away from u. i chose. the choice i made had put me in great misery and had turned me into an emo-tian. pain is an understatement of what i am feeling; i can only feel-- NUMB.u never fail to surprise me and move me with ur deeds. i always feel belonged each time i am embraced. but all these are GONE, GONE, GONE.
when u are gone, my heart's misses u.
when u are gone, my mind's failling too.
when u are gone, my world came crashing thru the day.
when u are gone, i think i will never be okaes.
BUT..i'm glad i made this choice.i'm glad i din go on further. i'm glad i chose to stop. i'm glad u just got cast away. for i never knew what could be in place if i hadnt choose this way. i was almost ruined when all seemed to be the end of me. there was no turning back but i am thankful i am found once again. it is his grace that pulls me thru the day. saying to rehab is a torture for addicts but to abstain is a breakdown for me (pulseless). everyday was the yearning for the touch, the attention, the words, the call-- just yearning for u. wonder if drugs are ever as strong. but each day passes with a new beginning and i am glad i was bleached with grace. i am grateful for the life i was given.
i never wanted to live so badly.
in all paradise...truth prevails.escapism is never a backdoor. u can run but u cant hide. light rays jus shine to judge. when it is day, shame never fails to be around. i took forever to lift my head high and again. i cant seem to hear what he had to say. all i am clothed with is disgrace. wretch and whore, i cant seem to find a line. i am all tt it describes. how did i ever fall into this route? i cant hear him anymore, dun even mention a whisper, i cant hear him at all. is this the end of my life?
i never wanted to live so badly.
salvage a worthless piece-- impurities.when all seem lost and life is tossed, i finally hear a whisper, i finally see a beam. i can never understand how life can be so free. i am not chained i am............. FREE! confession is pain but forgivenes is sane! it does exist! it does say u may live, it does say u are free. i can breathe again. i can feast with saints. i dun feel condemned, i dun feel ashamed. not anymore. i can re-live. i can express freedom once again.
i never wanted to live so badly.
BUT with the expense of someone whom i never knew loved me this much. the scarred hands gave me a second chance. the scar that serves as a yardstick for the rest of my life. and now... these scars in me allows second chance for many who are like me. it is time to hear tt whisper, it is time to see that beam. it is time u say,
i never wanted to live so badly.
Something She got from Jacq.
I think it conveys very raw thoughts and emotions :)
here it is:
i miss u. i miss the times when we spent tgt. i miss ur undivided attention. i miss those days where i am always placed first. i miss those days where u would do anything for me even to the extent of pain. i miss those days where u would just say u love me, me only. i miss u. i miss u dearly. i cant help but to suppress my desire for u. i yearn for the touch u gave and the days where the world is jus revolving between u and me. these times spent is irreplaceable.
i never wanted to live so badly.
i can only say it is gone. i can only say i choose not to have u. i am having intense regret for the pressured decision made. i chose to walk out on u, i chose to avoid u, i chose to just live in pretense. T.T i doubt ur existence.
i stopped living. i cant celebrate with u when u had victory nor can i smile at u to say u did it. i chose to turn away from u. i chose. the choice i made had put me in great misery and had turned me into an emo-tian. pain is an understatement of what i am feeling; i can only feel-- NUMB.u never fail to surprise me and move me with ur deeds. i always feel belonged each time i am embraced. but all these are GONE, GONE, GONE.
when u are gone, my heart's misses u.
when u are gone, my mind's failling too.
when u are gone, my world came crashing thru the day.
when u are gone, i think i will never be okaes.
BUT..i'm glad i made this choice.i'm glad i din go on further. i'm glad i chose to stop. i'm glad u just got cast away. for i never knew what could be in place if i hadnt choose this way. i was almost ruined when all seemed to be the end of me. there was no turning back but i am thankful i am found once again. it is his grace that pulls me thru the day. saying to rehab is a torture for addicts but to abstain is a breakdown for me (pulseless). everyday was the yearning for the touch, the attention, the words, the call-- just yearning for u. wonder if drugs are ever as strong. but each day passes with a new beginning and i am glad i was bleached with grace. i am grateful for the life i was given.
i never wanted to live so badly.
in all paradise...truth prevails.escapism is never a backdoor. u can run but u cant hide. light rays jus shine to judge. when it is day, shame never fails to be around. i took forever to lift my head high and again. i cant seem to hear what he had to say. all i am clothed with is disgrace. wretch and whore, i cant seem to find a line. i am all tt it describes. how did i ever fall into this route? i cant hear him anymore, dun even mention a whisper, i cant hear him at all. is this the end of my life?
i never wanted to live so badly.
salvage a worthless piece-- impurities.when all seem lost and life is tossed, i finally hear a whisper, i finally see a beam. i can never understand how life can be so free. i am not chained i am............. FREE! confession is pain but forgivenes is sane! it does exist! it does say u may live, it does say u are free. i can breathe again. i can feast with saints. i dun feel condemned, i dun feel ashamed. not anymore. i can re-live. i can express freedom once again.
i never wanted to live so badly.
BUT with the expense of someone whom i never knew loved me this much. the scarred hands gave me a second chance. the scar that serves as a yardstick for the rest of my life. and now... these scars in me allows second chance for many who are like me. it is time to hear tt whisper, it is time to see that beam. it is time u say,
i never wanted to live so badly.
Friday, March 21, 2008
Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate:
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer's lease hath all too short a date:
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm'd;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance, or nature's changing course untrimm'd;
But thy eternal summer shall not fade,
Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st;
Nor shall Death brag thou wander'st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st:
So long as man can breath, or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.
~ William Shakespeare (1564-1616)
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Saturday, March 15, 2008
and i was thinking (while walking to programming lecture) about how it's not as tiring as i thought it'll be to meet people and have lessons and meet people and have lessons consecutively when my body decided to warn me that i'm stretching it a little.
'heart is willing, but body is weak':S
i went to the toilet at 2.15pm, in the midst of programming lecture.. and returned back at 2.40pm (with an unresolved stomachache). then went to the toilet again at 2.50pm and came back at 3pm. hahaa. thank God by then it's much better:)
the last trip occurred after coming back to school from clementi :)
i was really quite zonked out after going to hq at 4+pm. just wanted to do up the surveys and ignore everyone. hahahaa.
was quite reluctant to go out to buy presents too :X hahaha.
was trying to do lab just now when i realised that trim() doesn't trim away whitespaces in between (how evil!) wellus.
'heart is willing, but body is weak':S
i went to the toilet at 2.15pm, in the midst of programming lecture.. and returned back at 2.40pm (with an unresolved stomachache). then went to the toilet again at 2.50pm and came back at 3pm. hahaa. thank God by then it's much better:)
the last trip occurred after coming back to school from clementi :)
i was really quite zonked out after going to hq at 4+pm. just wanted to do up the surveys and ignore everyone. hahahaa.
was quite reluctant to go out to buy presents too :X hahaha.
was trying to do lab just now when i realised that trim() doesn't trim away whitespaces in between (how evil!) wellus.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
I grew up with the notion of
吃得苦中苦，
方为人上人。
i think it's shaped the way i think and the way i view certain things:)
-----------
i like the verse that's printed on the DesperationBand CD pamphlet:
Revelations 12:11b:
'They did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death'
-----------
One big test tomorrow:)
the amount of time we spend on doing things that'll disappear soon with the wind, the effects of which but cause a gentle imprint on the skin of history and disappear as soon as it tries to make a mark.
------------
friends of the same page prayed and interceded together on a monday evening at the stairs. haha.
吃得苦中苦，
方为人上人。
i think it's shaped the way i think and the way i view certain things:)
-----------
i like the verse that's printed on the DesperationBand CD pamphlet:
Revelations 12:11b:
'They did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death'
-----------
One big test tomorrow:)
the amount of time we spend on doing things that'll disappear soon with the wind, the effects of which but cause a gentle imprint on the skin of history and disappear as soon as it tries to make a mark.
------------
friends of the same page prayed and interceded together on a monday evening at the stairs. haha.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Love Defined
- Matt Dubois -
What is love, but an emotion,
So strong and so pure,
That nurtured and shared with another
All tests it will endure?
What is love, but a force
To bring the mighty low,
With the strength to shame the mountains
And halt time’s ceaseless flow?
What is love, but a triumph,
A glorious goal attained,
The union of two souls, two hearts
A bond the angels have ordained?
What is love, but a champion,
To cast the tyrant from his throne,
And raise the flag of truth and peace,
And fear of death o’erthrow?
What is love, but a beacon,
To guide the wayward heart,
A blazing light upon the shoals
That dash cherished dreams apart?
And what is love, but forever,
Eternal and sincere,
A flame that through wax and wane
Will outlive life’s brief years?
So I’ll tell it on the mountaintops,
In all places high and low,
That love for you is my reason to be,
And will never break or bow.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Monday, March 10, 2008
I'm in a fight not physical
And I'm in a war
But not with this world
You are the light that's beautiful
And I want more
I want all that's Yours
Joy unspeakable that won't go away
And just enough strength
To live for today
So I never have to worry
What tomorrow will bring
'Cause my faith is on solid rock
I am counting on God
CHORUS
I am counting on
I am counting on God
Bridge:
The miracle of Christ in me
Is the mystery that sets me free
I'm nothing like I used to be
Open up your eyes you'll see
---------------
i like this song :)
Thursday, March 06, 2008
:)
got pictures from qing's facebook!
hahaa.
the 9 presents that they gave me :)
me with the cauliflower bouquet (wrapped by fungi!)
the cauliflower bouquet!:)
fungi loving the cauliflower bouquet she wrapped. lol
us :) those who turned up. hahaa. me, yileng, yingxin, fungi and qing :)
------------------
earlier in the year, we celebrated jingting's 21st birthday at the singapore recreation club :) haha. picture courtesy of jasmine low :)
here's us!
-----------
present #10 came from my own sister who gave a chomel starfish pendant:)
present #11 came from jiali who bought cheesecake for me:) hahaha!
present #12 came from jiayan who gave a very big paperclip(hahaha) and a box of meiji's meltykisses :) it's been shared. LOL
thank you lingyun for remembering my birthday!:) and to michelle who wished me happy birthday:)
thank you xavier who already asked me about my birthday 3 days in advance, and wanted to treat me to lunch. hahaa. but it's okay la :)
thank you michelle and weiling in advance for spending sunday with me as a celebration:) haha. so silly.
thank you joyce and yizhong and jalea in advance for planning tim's and my birthday! LOL.
:)
i have such silly people around me. hahaa.
got pictures from qing's facebook!
hahaa.
the 9 presents that they gave me :)
me with the cauliflower bouquet (wrapped by fungi!)
the cauliflower bouquet!:)
fungi loving the cauliflower bouquet she wrapped. lol
us :) those who turned up. hahaa. me, yileng, yingxin, fungi and qing :)
------------------
earlier in the year, we celebrated jingting's 21st birthday at the singapore recreation club :) haha. picture courtesy of jasmine low :)
here's us!
-----------
present #10 came from my own sister who gave a chomel starfish pendant:)
present #11 came from jiali who bought cheesecake for me:) hahaha!
present #12 came from jiayan who gave a very big paperclip(hahaha) and a box of meiji's meltykisses :) it's been shared. LOL
thank you lingyun for remembering my birthday!:) and to michelle who wished me happy birthday:)
thank you xavier who already asked me about my birthday 3 days in advance, and wanted to treat me to lunch. hahaa. but it's okay la :)
thank you michelle and weiling in advance for spending sunday with me as a celebration:) haha. so silly.
thank you joyce and yizhong and jalea in advance for planning tim's and my birthday! LOL.
:)
i have such silly people around me. hahaa.
Wednesday, March 05, 2008
Here's a review for Darren Hayes' 'newest' CD 'this delicate thing we've made'. hahaha. got the CD as one of the 9 gifts I received from the girls (fungi, qing, yileng, yingxin, guan, wanling and huiyuan). listening to it now :) hahaa
the reviewer doesn't like 'waking the monster', but i like! hahaa.
and now i can listen to 'neverland' without using imeem! hahaa.
thanks fungi for bringing it over from US =]
the reviewer doesn't like 'waking the monster', but i like! hahaa.
and now i can listen to 'neverland' without using imeem! hahaa.
thanks fungi for bringing it over from US =]
Tuesday, March 04, 2008
from the ball of undecipherable emotions, i managed to tease out two yesterday. dissonance and reminiscence:) think these 2 were the heavier emotions in the ball. now it feels lighter. haha.
had a good time praying to God yesterday:) had a good day thinking about things also. and had a good time at team appreciation night as well. haha.
ah. my social work lecture was at 10am. i refell asleep and woke up very peacefully at 10.26am. LOL.
had a good time praying to God yesterday:) had a good day thinking about things also. and had a good time at team appreciation night as well. haha.
ah. my social work lecture was at 10am. i refell asleep and woke up very peacefully at 10.26am. LOL.
I've got a trait in me, which is both a strength and a weakness. I like to look far into the future in terms of relationships and evaluate the outcomes of these relationships.
it's usually 3-6 months in advance. hahaa.
sometimes it allows me to see great hope in a situation which seemingly seems very bleak at that moment. it allows me to see further into how a person can become in the future. it allows me to envision the person i'll see 3-6 months later, the potential of the person, the potential of the relationship (e.g. friendship, kinship..).
it also, in a sense, buffers me against potential seperations by preparing my heart and mind for it first. so that when the time comes, it eases me more gently into the change that happens.
but in the midst of buffering, though i am eased more gently into that change, as the body does the buffering, i start to experience the emotions which i will otherwise experience 3-6 months later. i can visualise the various scenarios, and as such, it's like a trailer experience as to what is to come.
----------------
hahaa. a lot of things have been happening in my life.. and they're not properly registered in my memory as of yet :) pple leaving, pple coming, things to do, things that were done.
my son and my daughter in the infocounter ministry are both transferring to adults soon :) hahaa. robin and veronica. they self-claimed that they were my children:S
but really thank God for them in this ministry:) when the ministry was done and pple were leaving church and all, they stayed on. don't think they'll see this.. but..
thank God for robin.. seeing his growth in the ministry and spiritually was something which i thank God for:) he's very passionate about business stuff.. and i'm sure greater things lay in wait as he enters the adults group:) thank God that he's forever very regular and faithful in turning up for duty, and in serving God through this ministry:) thank God that he trusted me enough to share about certain things in his life. I thank God that i had the chance to give advice in certain areas.. and thanks for taking in my opinions when he didn't have to listen to me:)
and thank God for veronica too.. i thank God for the chance to be with you at the side through your ups and downs. i thank God for your continual service to God even as you rose up. i thank God for your dedication to God, me and the ministry despite studying and working at the same time. much enjoy your presence:)
ah. haha. i'll miss the two of them :) planning for their farewell=D
it's usually 3-6 months in advance. hahaa.
sometimes it allows me to see great hope in a situation which seemingly seems very bleak at that moment. it allows me to see further into how a person can become in the future. it allows me to envision the person i'll see 3-6 months later, the potential of the person, the potential of the relationship (e.g. friendship, kinship..).
it also, in a sense, buffers me against potential seperations by preparing my heart and mind for it first. so that when the time comes, it eases me more gently into the change that happens.
but in the midst of buffering, though i am eased more gently into that change, as the body does the buffering, i start to experience the emotions which i will otherwise experience 3-6 months later. i can visualise the various scenarios, and as such, it's like a trailer experience as to what is to come.
----------------
hahaa. a lot of things have been happening in my life.. and they're not properly registered in my memory as of yet :) pple leaving, pple coming, things to do, things that were done.
my son and my daughter in the infocounter ministry are both transferring to adults soon :) hahaa. robin and veronica. they self-claimed that they were my children:S
but really thank God for them in this ministry:) when the ministry was done and pple were leaving church and all, they stayed on. don't think they'll see this.. but..
thank God for robin.. seeing his growth in the ministry and spiritually was something which i thank God for:) he's very passionate about business stuff.. and i'm sure greater things lay in wait as he enters the adults group:) thank God that he's forever very regular and faithful in turning up for duty, and in serving God through this ministry:) thank God that he trusted me enough to share about certain things in his life. I thank God that i had the chance to give advice in certain areas.. and thanks for taking in my opinions when he didn't have to listen to me:)
and thank God for veronica too.. i thank God for the chance to be with you at the side through your ups and downs. i thank God for your continual service to God even as you rose up. i thank God for your dedication to God, me and the ministry despite studying and working at the same time. much enjoy your presence:)
ah. haha. i'll miss the two of them :) planning for their farewell=D
Monday, March 03, 2008
multilayered emotions. multifaceted refractions that shine forth.
there're things in me that i can't decipher.
think that's why God created different forms of expressions.
when i can't find the words for it,
there's still music.
when i can't find the tune for it,
there's still movement.
and when i can't find the movement for it,
i think.
and try to comprehend...
what is it that i am hiding?
what is it that i am denying?
what is it that i am lamenting for?
what is it that i am experiencing?
what is it that i am feeling?
there're things in me that i can't decipher.
think that's why God created different forms of expressions.
when i can't find the words for it,
there's still music.
when i can't find the tune for it,
there's still movement.
and when i can't find the movement for it,
i think.
and try to comprehend...
what is it that i am hiding?
what is it that i am denying?
what is it that i am lamenting for?
what is it that i am experiencing?
what is it that i am feeling?
ちょっと疲れいました
お休みなさい!
i like the piano pieces done by this guy. clicking on the link just now wld have brought you to one of his piano piece.. (not really his.. but he played the piece. lol)
お休みなさい!
i like the piano pieces done by this guy. clicking on the link just now wld have brought you to one of his piano piece.. (not really his.. but he played the piece. lol)
Sunday, March 02, 2008
Many a times, battles are won or lost in the mind. The thought that starts, builds, and manifests itself in the behavioural realm.
The choice starts in the mind as well. When we decide our hearts (subconsciously) and our minds (consciously) as to what we want to do/ where we want to go, we carry out that attitude or bring forth the behavioural manifestation of it in our actions and words.
so says the verse 'out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks'
i guess that's why joy is so important:) joy that comes from being secure, from knowing our purpose in life, from unconditional love. joy that flows from within.. 'cos it influences our thoughts, it influences our attitudes towards things, and as such, it influences our motivation to do things, which influence our actions ultimately.
so if we want to do something well (e.g. not succumbing to a particular temptation) , many a times it's not a matter of changing our behaviour per se, but rather, a change of our thought processes and our outlook towards it 'taking captive of our minds'.
something we know :) but not something we all apply XD
The choice starts in the mind as well. When we decide our hearts (subconsciously) and our minds (consciously) as to what we want to do/ where we want to go, we carry out that attitude or bring forth the behavioural manifestation of it in our actions and words.
so says the verse 'out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks'
i guess that's why joy is so important:) joy that comes from being secure, from knowing our purpose in life, from unconditional love. joy that flows from within.. 'cos it influences our thoughts, it influences our attitudes towards things, and as such, it influences our motivation to do things, which influence our actions ultimately.
so if we want to do something well (e.g. not succumbing to a particular temptation) , many a times it's not a matter of changing our behaviour per se, but rather, a change of our thought processes and our outlook towards it 'taking captive of our minds'.
something we know :) but not something we all apply XD